29-Jun-2000
Greetings to all! I'm posting this song fic for Truth and all the others who are enjoying her fic _It's the Pilot_.
I got the idea to write this based on some discussions with her about the pilots and their activities. I could really picture what she was describing in my head and I wanted a way to share those pictures with the rest of you.
And then I heard Don McLean's American Pie on the radio (the original version - _not_ Madonna's icky version) and that reminded me of several wonderful songs that are on that same album. I went back home and listened to the album and came across the one song that (to me) seemed to match up perfectly with the actions and thoughts of the characters in _It's the Pilot_, called "Crossroads".
For those of you who've never heard it, the song is basically Don McLean singing while playing the piano. It's a very quiet - almost romantic song.
The songfic is definitely shounen ai, but that's because Truth really does intend to have those leanings but without the "picture", it's sometimes hard to tell. I did occasional quote her fic exactly, but then added my own "picture". Anything from her fic is denoted by << >>.
I mean this to be an extension of her wonderful fic and it is dedicated to her. She has kindly given permission for me to use her fic this way.
I hope that everyone enjoys my representation of _It's the Pilot_. Enjoy!
Title: It's the Pilot - Crossroads
Author: Rhina
Archive: With permission
Warning: Shounen Ai. OC.
Rating: No rating
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing and never
Will. I get no profits from this.
_It's the Pilot_ by Truth
"Crossroads" is by Don McLean
I've got nothing on my mind
Nothing to remember
<<Feeling a bit unsettled, I decided that a cup of tea might help me think. I wandered off into the kitchen.>>
Quatre raises his rapt eyes from the computer's blinking screen. A thousand thoughts raced across his mind and his hands shook briefly before he regained his calm, almost passive, expression. He looked once more at the message flashing across the screen and then allowed his gaze to wander across to the kitchen.
Standing and stretching gracefully, he moved on silent feet into the kitchen. Humming, fairly tunelessly, he filled the kettle and set it on the stove to boil. At the sound of the whistle, he poured the steaming water into the teapot and set it to steep. Carefully, he gathered the sugar and milk he liked in his tea, as rumblings came from the direction of the living room.
In the living room, Heero crossed to the computer to glance at its flashing message. He quickly read it through once and had started reading it again when Trowa entered the room. Seeing Heero's face turn into a snarl, Trowa moved to stand next to Heero in order to see what he was reading better. The deepening of Trowa's frown was the only change in expression as the pair began to silently read the other documents open on the screen in an extremely methodical manner.
In the kitchen, Quatre finished one cup of tea and snuck a peek into the living room. Trowa and Heero never noticed as they are so engrossed in their reading. With a fleeting sly smile, Quatre returned to make a second cup of tea.
<< So maybe I am a manipulative little bastard. >>
Nothing to forget
I've got nothing to regret
An arrogant blonde boy knocks on the door of a small house.
The door is pulled open by Quatre. His blue eyes widen with surprise and a merciless smile crosses his lips. In the blink of an eye, his calm welcoming expression returns. He holds open the door for the younger boy and invites him in.
Heero comes around the corner at the same time Trowa descends the stairs to meet the newcomer. Heero's face hardens into his "game face" as he watches the boy through narrowed eyes. Trowa's face does not change expression in the slightest. Only his eyes go from the soft green of freshly cut grass to the hard emerald color of anger.
The boy introduces himself, seemingly assured that they will welcome him. His arrogance grates across the fresh wounds of the trio.
Within an instant of saying why he is there, Heero has pulled out his gun and grabbed the boy by the front of his shirt. Shoving him up against the wall, Heero presses the barrel of the gun into the soft underside of the boy's jaw.
Trowa has a knife in each hand and stands an arm length away from Heero and his captive. His posture is deceptively relaxed as he begins flipping first one knife and then the other.
Quatre looks at Trowa and smiles wryly as he shakes his head. His blue eyes don't sparkle like usual and are now as dark and rough as stormy seas. He no longer spares a friendly look for the captive
But I'm all tied up on the inside
No-one knows quite what I've got
Wufei is dressed in black pants with a traditional Chinese top, done in black and emblazoned with red dragons. He has a bag in his hand and is pulling things from a closet and stuffing them inside. His movements are quick and efficient, done automatically and without the need for thought.
He searches each part of his side of the room, taking only what is important or needed. Some books are tossed in on top of the clothes. The bag is almost full as he turns toward Duo's side of the room.
He rapidly goes through the closet and the desk, only adding Duo's laptop to his bag. He seems to be looking for something. He tries every place in the room and then turns to go.
Before he leaves the room, he suddenly turns around and heads back toward Duo's bed. Reaching out, he flips over the pillow. Laying on the top of the sheets, having been protected by the pillow, is a coiled 3 foot length of braided hair. It's chestnut brown color gleams in the room, a ray of hope and faith in the darkness around.
Wufei reaches out and almost reverently picks up the braid. The slippery hair slides against his rough fingers like a lover's caress. Time stands still as Wufei stares at the braid, a thousand thoughts crossing his mind, emotions high and tightly strung. Gingerly, so as not to hurt it, Wufei lays the braid on top of the items in his bag and closes it.
Shutting off his emotions, Wufei stands, hefts the bad and leaves the room.
And I know that on the outside
What I used to be - I'm not
Anymore
A crowd of students streams down a corridor, they pass each other with happy greetings and quick snatches of conversation as they move from class to class. Some students are in military uniform and others are in the fine clothing typical of their class and station in life.
Walking through their midst is a solitary figure in military uniform. His arms are full of various texts and notebooks. He moves purposefully through them, never touching anyone, never making eye contact. Behind him boys and girls alike swoon and whisper to each other. He is totally oblivious to them. His eyes are arrogantly unconcerned and seem to be concentrated on nothing at all. His hair is short and shaved close to his head, in typical military fashion. His steps are quick and sure as he heads in the direction of a classroom.
He turns and moves down a side corridor, empty of student traffic and pauses for a moment. With a quiet sigh, he moves to run his hand through hair long shorn off. For a moment, his large amethyst eyes glisten with the hint of tears, before the mask of arrogance returns.
You know I've heard about people like me
But I never made the connection
Wufei is sits quietly at a desk, wearing a flowing scarlet shirt and pants of the deepest black. His dark hair is loose and rests gently on the tops of his shoulders. He is half-turned, in order to partially face the person who has thrown open the room's door.
Standing in the door is a tall youth. He is backlit, throwing shadows across his face, mostly concealing the sneering lips and eyes. His cadet's uniform is visible as light flashes off the golden trim and then sinks into its deep blue fabric. His arrogant posture and expression are only heightened by the pose he adopts. It was almost as if he knew just how to lean against the door frame in order to accent the custom-tailoring of his uniform and help you realize who was in charge here.
The figure smirks and reaches in and carelessly flicks on the light, revealing his features to Wufei.
Wufei turns to fully face the figure in the doorway as the light goes on. The slight widening of his eyes gives away how the figure has startled him.
The arrogance melts away from Lt. Maxwell, leaving a relieved Duo in his wake.
They walk one road to set them free
And find they've gone the wrong direction
<< We. As in Maxwell and myself. >>
Wufei lays on his side on his bed. He is dressed for sleeping and the lights are out, but he does not close his eyes. He merely watches a slumbering Duo.
Duo lays on his stomach, one hand under his pillow and the other throw out towards Wufei. His mask is gone and he seems to sleep in peace, despite the tangled covers.
Dark eyes follow the rise and fall of Duo's chest. The only sign of Wufei's inner tension is the hand clenched into a fist on top of the covers.
<< He no longer wears the laughing mask or plays the fool. Much as he would deny it, I do believe that Lt. Maxwell is much closer to the real Duo Maxwell than the one that I knew. Don't misunderstand me, the jester is real. But the smiling fool is only part of the whole. Before this episode, I thought I knew who he was.
Now I know that he is a stranger. And as long as I am rooming with Lt. Maxwell, I will probably never meet the real Duo. >>
And I believe I'll walk them all
No matter what I may have planned
Duo sits at a desk in a neat and tidy room. Books line the shelf up above the desk and all the drawers are closed, all items carefully filed away. The only exceptions being the book he is reading and the paper he is writing on. He is wearing in his uniform, a concession to relaxation is having the top two buttons undone. His short hair gleams in the low light. The only noise in the room is the scratch of Duo's pen across the paper.
Duo stops writing for a moment in order to flip through the book at his elbow. His other hand unconsciously reaches back behind his head. He moves as if to grab a thick braid of hair before realizing what he is doing. Duo stiffens his spine, picks up his pen and once more begins writing.
Watching all of this is Wufei. Wearing a black tank top and flame red silk pants, he too is sitting at a desk. He is sitting sideways on his chair, legs crossed on the seat. Books are in a neat stack at his elbow and an open one lays in his lap. His dark brown eyes watch Duo reach for the non-existent braid. Pain shadows Wufei's eyes, turning them a blacker color, for a moment before he too returns to his studies.
<< "All the Cadets get a haircut," he told me. And that's all he would say. I've seen him reach for his missing braid though. >>
But there's no need for turning back
'cause all roads lead to where I stand
Quatre is dressed in a pair of pressed dark brown pants and a light tan colored cotton dress shirt. He looks almost totally respectable except for the battered leather jacket he has in his arms.
He stands in the doorway of a nearly empty house, surrounded by a couple of various sized bags. As his blue eyes gaze up into the bluer than blue sky, he unconsciously clenches his arms around the jacket, as if he could bring it's owner closer.
<< I kept the leather coat. Somehow, I just couldn't leave it behind. >>
Can you remember who I was
Can you still feel it
Wufei, dressed in a scarlet top and black flowing trousers, watches a sobbing Duo, who is still dressed in Lt. Maxwell's uniform. Duo's face is hidden, buried in his hands. His shoulders shake with repressed sobs and he is curled around himself in a protective posture.
Wufei's face, no longer with it's mask of determination and ruthlessness, is full of concern. His brown eyes radiate both compassion and worry as he stares at the curled up figure on the floor. Gracefully he stands and crosses to the figure of Duo. He kneels and gently pulls the young man into strong, comforting arms.
Duo looks up at Wufei with glistening, tear-filled amethyst eyes and without further urging, wraps both arms around his friend. More tears fall from his eyes as he begins to tell his story and Wufei struggles to comfort the distraught young man and learn what has happened since his capture.
Wufei stares down at the shorn head with such concern and gentleness as the words pour out of Duo and flow over Wufei. Wufei's hands begin to move up and down Duo's back without conscious though, simply the urge to reduce the pain. Duo seems to relax and come back to himself as he talks and Wufei listens.
Can you find my pain
Can you heal it
Duo sits quietly at his desk. He is dressed in a borrowed black shirt and pants. He looks relaxed and comfortable, more than he ever had before. He is watching Wufei study.
Wufei is dressed all in red and his hair is blacker and longer than before. It hangs, framing his face as he stares down at his reading. With an impatient gesture and a slight scowl, he reaches up and pushes it out of his way. Duo smiles slightly at the un-Wufei like gesture.
Several more minutes pass and Wufei sighs and stops reading. Placing a marker in the book, he closes it and looks up. His dark gaze meets Duo's solemn one.
<< "Wufei," he began slowly, "there wasn't any white in your closet." >>
Wufei's brown eyes deepen to nearly black as he struggles to contain his emotions. Carefully he removes the book from his lap and stands to place it back on it's proper shelf. Tense hands grip the edge of the shelf so tight that his knuckles turn white. Wufei fights within himself to answer Duo's explosive question.
Duo watches Wufei's struggle with concern. He had not meant to upset Wufei. Duo stands and crosses the room on silent feet. Without making a sound, he lays a gentle hand on Wufei's tense shoulder.
Wufei whips around and stares at Duo with wide eyes. Duo smiles, a devil-may-care Shinigami smile. Wufei can't resist the something in him that urges him to smile back. A gentle smile flits across Wufei's face and he visibly relaxes and begins to speak.
Duo accepts the simple explanation and the two quietly go off to their beds. Duo falls asleep quickly while Wufei lays awake. Quietly he rolls onto his side in order to see the other young man better.
<< I wear white to signify that I am mourning. I had a wife, once. She died. The story is more complicated than that, but you don't really need to know any more. >>
And lay your hands upon me now
And cast this darkness from my soul
Duo dressed in white t-shirt and navy blue slacks stands, unsteadily, in the middle of a small lounge. The lounge is filled with several small tables, a couch and a couple of chairs, all tilted at different angles, as though there had been a fight in the room. Laying on the floor are three dead guards, which are ignored by the living occupants to the room. Duo's temple is beginning to swell and is turning an interesting shade of purple. He is staring at the person across from him whose hands are clenched on his shoulders. Duo amethyst eyes grow wide with remembered pain and compounded stress.
Wufei stands across from Duo. His brown eyes are black with rage and he is breathing heavily in his anger. Careful anxious eyes roam over Duo's face looking for a sign of Duo's return to sanity.
Duo's eyes widen even further as stress upon stress is added from his memories. With an agonized groan, his knees give way. Sinking to the floor, sobs begin to rack his body as tears flow freely - releasing the pain Lt. Maxwell had wrought on Duo's sensitive soul.
With a sigh of relief and a sob of his own, Wufei too sinks to the floor. Strong supportive arms wrap around the sobbing form of his friend. Wufei's tears join Duo's as they struggle to cleanse the pain from their souls.
<< When had I learned to feel again?
And I had Maxwell. He understood me far better than he had ever let on.
And he was trusting me with his life.
I will not wear white for Duo Maxwell. It will not come to that.
I swear it. >>
Feeling safer than he had in weeks, months, perhaps even years, Duo lets go of his pain. Safe within the arms of the one who cares, he fights and finds sanity. Wufei clutches Duo closer to the warmth of his body, longing to ease not only Duo's pain, but his own.
Long hair brushes against Wufei's cheeks and he buries his face in Duo's neck as Duo continues to sob.
Wufei's own silent tears fall onto Duo's warm skin. And together their pain eases, safe in the shelter of strong arms and sleep claims them.
You alone can light my way
You alone can make me whole
Once again
Wufei is dressed in blackest black. His tank top and black pants are slightly dusty and his hair hangs loose, brushing against his face. His is lurking in a small room.
The only light is from a computer screen which has Wufei's complete attention. He is staring at the screen, scrolling through it slowly. He comes to one passage and the screen stopped moving altogether.
<< Lt. Maxwell is a pain, but he's got the whole 'proper decorum' thing down cold. I think I'll take him out and assassinate him when this is all over. The guy gives me the willies.
Yeah yeah. Same to you! I'm not nuts. I've just been pretending to be someone else for too damn long. I'll be glad when I can get rid of this stupid uniform. I'll be glad when they stop cutting my hair once a week... >>
Wufei's eyes darken with pain and anger on Duo's behalf. Long sensitive fingers stroked across the screen, wishing to erase the pain from the writer. Wufei's hand then leaves the computer screen and clenches into a fist. The light from the computer screen reflects his grimly determined expression.
We've walked both sides of ev'ry street
Through all kinds of windy weather
<< Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action. >>
Heero is busy typing on a computer keyboard. He stares intently at the computer screen as different images and text fly by. He seems to be searching for something, flicking through things quickly, barely glancing at each one. Passwords are asked for and promptly entered as levels of security diminish beneath flying fingers. His eyes coolly reflect the screen as he continues the hunt.
Long strong fingers hit the keys with determination and force. Blue eyes widen as the piece of information he has been searching for crosses his screen. A small smile of triumph crosses his lips before retreating under the serious deadpan mask he commonly wears.
Transferring what he discovers to a small easily concealable disk, he exits the computer's programs back through the security, carefully removing traces of his presence.
Gathering his things, he leaves the room and retreats to the safe house he shares with Quatre and Trowa. He carefully lays out his information to his companions.
<< The second was that we were now completely on our own, able only to trust each other. >>
But that was never our defeat
As long as we could walk together
<< He shouldna risked it! Not for me. >>
A superior Wufei stands before Duo who is seated on the bed. Any remains of tears and stress have been wiped away as Duo lectures Wufei on all the reasons why he shouldn't have traveled here to rescue him. He is using the arrogance and charm that usually gets him what he wants.
With an impatient gesture and a smirk, Wufei slices through Duo's words, refusing to listen to any more. With a fluid grace, he begins to stalk Duo, listing reasons why he is here to help him and how his plan _will_ work. His tone and posture become condescending, lecturing and decidedly superior.
When he finishes, his arms crossed across his chest, Wufei looks more arrogant than Lt. Maxwell. Duo simply stares in disbelief before shaking his head and smiling wryly.
<< I hate it when he gets all superior. I _really_ hate it, 'cause it's when he lectures. I call it his uber killjoy mode. >>
So there's no need for turning back
'cause all roads lead to where we stand
Wufei lies beneath a bed, staring out at shining black boots near the head of the bed. His hands are clenched close to his side and his legs are quivering from tensing them.
<< I couldn't leave him. He needed to know that I wasn't going to abandon him. >>
Duo kneels on the ground, assisting a tense Wufei from the hiding place beneath the bed. He helps Wufei sit on the edge of the bed as Duo kneels before him. With tender, gentle hands, he slowly begins rubbing Wufei's legs. Duo continues to sit on the floor, rubbing slowly to bring back circulation as he gazed up at Wufei with solemn eyes.
Wufei leans down and begins to whisper into Duo's ear. His eyes continually stray from Duo's ear to the view of his profile, to his neck, to the strong hands which continue to rub his legs. His thoughts strayed....
<< Just when did I start caring so much about Duo? When did I lose my objectivity? >>
Duo whispers something in return and smirks at the look on Wufei's face.
<< So, I now have a new project to amuse myself with. Who is the real Chang Wufei? Why is he so determined to keep me around, yet won't willingly make eye contact with me? Like I can't figure it out.... I'm not _completely_ clueless, you know, previous rack record aside. The only question I have, is...
....what should I do about it?>>
And I believe we'll walk them all
No matter what we may have planned
It is a small house, set out in the countryside, away from prying eyes. The windows are open and a breeze gently pushed back the curtains. Upstairs are five bedrooms, each quite small but yet returning a spark of personality reflected from it's inhabitant. The common areas are fairly tidy, with just enough clutter to show that people live there. The furniture is well worn and slightly shabby.
Seated around the table are five young men. The are eating what appears to be an evening meal and talking and laughing and teasing.
Quatre is urging Trowa to have seconds and a longer haired Duo is busy telling a long involved tale to smiling Wufei, who is muttering evil side comments under his breath, and a smirking Heero.
<< Home means something very different to me than it used to. It was a very painful thing to realize. When did the word home become synonymous with the faces of my fellow pilots, I wonder? >>
End
Well, it turned out to be quite a bit longer than I intended.
Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are encouraged and can be sent to myself, Rhina or to Truth.
Rhina
Please send comments to: rhinahime@mail.com