<Here's the start of another fict. Yes, again I have reverted back to my fav. yaoi pairing, 1x2/2x1. Since I'm typing it now before I drop off to sleep, it'll probably be finished in my next session (like, when I'm not working, so that'll be sometime on the weekend or when I drop by again). Well it's yet another dark one. I tried to make it happy, but five sentances into it, I gave up. Are ppls sick of my ficts yet? (Like, do you find them repetitive?)>
‘If you want to, I will. Do you really want me to leave?’
The tapping of the keyboard ceased.
‘Go to bed Duo, I’m busy.’
‘No, you listen to me Heero, I’m sick of your doing that to me. Sooner or later, you have to answer me. You just can’t just leave it like that.’ Duo stormed up to Heero and grasped his shoulders. ‘Just answer me damnit, I need to know where I stand with you.’
Blue eyes surveyed him distantly as Heero faced Duo. ‘It will not affect the mission.’
‘That’s bull, and you know it! I can’t work like this.’
‘Then stay behind.’
The monosyllable cut into his heart.
‘Heero, you really are the perfect soldier aren’t you? You couldn’t give a damn about us. You or me.’
‘Is it really important that I answer your question?’
Duo’s mouth suddenly dried. ‘Yes’, he whispered. ‘I need to know if you mean it. About me getting out of your way. About us being finished.’
‘I do. I can’t stand you around me.’
Duo head jerked up, his cobalt blue eyes filled with pain. For once he was unable to speak, his vocal chords frozen. Heero studied his reaction without any emotion. Seconds passed.
‘Why?’ he finally choked out. ‘Then why did you...’
‘A moment of human weakness Duo, it meant nothing. I did not know that you would get so weak over this, otherwise I would have taken my desires elsewhere.’
‘Human weakness? You? You don’t know the meaning of the word!’
‘Then you know it too well.’
His lips twisted in a semblance of a smile. ‘Well now, if I didn’t before, I sure as hell know it now. Sorry for bothering you Heero’, he spat out the brown-haired boy’s name with hatred, ‘but I will be now removing my offensive presence. Thanks for the lesson, I’ll be sure to remember it.’
The swishing of the electronic door announced Duo’s departure. Heero resumed typing. Then he stopped and swore softly. The screen was filled again with nonsensical words. It was lucky Duo had not read the screen, otherwise he would have seen straight through the lies Heero had told. The repeated phrase stared at him from the blue screen. He whispered the words once, tasting the feel of them on his tongue, then pressed the delete button once more. Stupid, He’d never get his report finished on time before that mission if he kept going off track.
Heero was dead. Somehow it didn’t seem real. Despite Heero’s order to leave for the colony, Duo knew he should have stayed and fought alongside the idiot. Even with their differences. They were after all, comrades and also, however briefly, they had gone beyond that. The pain was tearing him up inside and he did not know where to run. If he could run, as somehow the news had frozen him, rendering incapable of doing anything beside feel. He now totally understood what human weakness was. It was not just giving away oneself to a hopelessly inhuman person, but being unable to cope without him.
Being foolishly ruled by emotions. Even if he was far away, Duo would have been content knowing that Heero was somewhere, except now he wasn’t. He wasn’t anywhere, at least, not anywhere Duo could reach him. Idiot, he couldn’t reach Heero anyway when they were together. What made him being dead all the more distant? It did however. Death was an impenetrable barrier. Duo knew that very well, after all, didn’t he deal in death as the Death God? An ironic chuckle rose up. Hello Heero, I’ve finally gotten you, didn’t I? Not the way I wanted though, but I still did.
‘Duo...’
He felt a hand being placed on his back. He knew it was Quatre attempting to console him, but he shook it off.
He’d take a page out of Heero’s book, and deal with it alone. As he had always done before he met Heero. Before he opened up to the other boy. Before he found out the hard way why he was better off being alone. Giving himself to Heero had left the door to his soul wide open, and he found he couldn’t close it properly anymore. Heero, you idiot. You just had to die on me, didn’t you? It wasn’t enough for me to be gone from your side physically, you wanted to get away from me out of this world too. The chuckle became a laugh.
Ignoring Quatre’s concerned look, Duo marched towards the edge of the cliff where they had landed in their respective mechas.
‘Are you happy now Heero?’ he lifted up his hands and cupped them to his mouth, forming a cone. ‘Are you far enough away from me?!’
Duo did not hear the soft footsteps behind him, but he felt the blow the person dealt him and saw the darkness that came after it.
Quatre winced as Trowa hit the braided boy from behind and grabbed hold of him before he could fall off the ledge.
‘Will he be okay?’
‘Besides a sore head tomorrow, he’ll be fine as much as he can be without Heero.’ Trowa lifted up Duo easily in his arms. ‘Let’s go now, there’s no reason to wait for anyone now.’
Heero was gone. And all of them knew it.
‘What about Wufei?’
‘He’s gone after the ship that released the mobile dolls. He won’t be back until he’s destroyed them all.’
Quatre sighed and held out a hand. He placed it on the unconscious Duo’s head as they walked together towards the hideout.
‘I guess I’ll make dinner for two then.’
‘If you want, I’ll let you touch me here... and here. And in return, you have to let me touch you... there.’
‘What the hell are you-?’ he forgot the words he was going to say.
‘What you wanted all these years.’
A gasp. Then a moan. ‘How did...’
‘I know? I’ve seen you watch me. I watched you too.’ Warm air brushed across his lips as he leaned forward to kiss the other, pausing slightly before contact.
‘I don’t...’
‘You know and I know, let’s not pretend anymore. We’re both mature enough to handle... this.’
A harsh exclamation. A chuckle arose from brown-haired boy.
‘Damnit, if you are going to be like that, don’t-’, thud, ‘complain to me in the morning. Do you really want me to do this? Do you?’
A hint of satisfaction rested in the blue depths that reflected his image. Like a mirror.
‘Just for tonight Duo... we’ll leave the morning for the future.’
And what future was that? He could no longer believe that somehow Heero would be back for him. Duo had no home to return to.
Quatre took out the keys and unlocked the room using one hand. In the other he held a large size container of food and a drink. They were for Duo. Quatre worried about him. The long-haired boy did not remember to eat at all if he did not remind him. Seven months had passed since Heero had gone, and the boy was functioning like a robot. It was even worse than the weeks that had followed after their breakup. At least Duo had been defiant then, with some emotion still. However...
Quatre turned the handle. Why the two had broken up still eluded him. The normally talkative Duo did not speak a word about it. As if they had never been.
He walked into total chaos.
It was pure destruction. Nothing was recognizable. Pieces of splintered wood laid everywhere, with metal objects thrown into corners. Strangely deformed by some force. Window glass lay shattered on the ground. The tiny fragments glittering in the rapidly fading sun. Splashes of water dampened the floor, mingled with a diluted reddish substance. A broken vase rested in the center of the room, the single rose in it crippled and bruised.
‘Oh my...’
He stared around incredulously. It was as if a hurricane had struck. Who could have- Duo!
Bang.
Quatre’s eyes widened at the echoed noise. No, Duo wouldn’t have... He did not even feel the packages he held drop from his hands as he raced towards the source of the sound. It was his entire fault, if he had kept a closer eye on him, Duo would not have... never had... He yanked open the bedroom door.
‘Duo!’
Then his breath caught.
‘Duo...’
‘Huh?’ Duo looked up from his position on the floor. A hammer was held upraised in his hand, positioned to bang a nail into the wooden post before him. He was fixing his bed, the single bunk more than a little lopsided with make shift corrections. He blinked at Quatre’s entrance. ‘Quatre, what’s wrong? You’ve got a weird look on your face.’
‘Duo, you...’ weak with relief, Quatre had to lean against the door frame, ‘you’re okay.’
Duo grinned sheepishly. ‘Uh, yeah. Sorry about the mess. I thought I had enough time to clean it up before you came.’
‘Duo..’, Quatre moved towards Duo. ‘I...’
‘I guess you won’t be getting your deposit back after all-’
To his surprise, Duo was enveloped in a strong hug. ‘I don’t care about that. I’m just glad you didn’t... follow Heero.’
‘Now why would I do that?’
‘Duo. Don’t.’
The arms around Duo tightened. Duo lowered his eyes. Sometimes, the blond was too perceptive.
‘So. He’s alive.’
‘We don’t know if he still is, though.’ The long-haired woman warned, her face looking into Trowa’s from the monitor. ‘There is no telling where he is.’
‘What is his mental status? How far did Enhance penetrate?’
Sally’s face clouded. ‘From what we can gather from the scientists, the system has worse side effects than the Zero system.’
‘You mean to say-’
‘That he is completely taken over by it. If we do find him, the chances of him becoming sane are completely nil. Trowa...’ Sally paused, he left behind a message for you. He told me it was very important that you get it. I’m putting it on screen now.’
The screen flickered once, and Trowa found himself looking at Heero.
‘Trowa. If I survive this mission, find me and kill me. I don’t want Duo to see me in that state.’ The brown haired boy looked up at the camera. ‘Please.’ The screen flickered again, and then went blank.
A boy wandered through the dark alleyways of the urban sprawl, his blue eyes strangely dull and blank. A rat scurried across the path of the boy. It squealed as the sneaker clad foot tread hard on its head. The boy continued on, leaving behind a small, twitching body behind, its brains squished out of its crushed skull. The death cry did not register on the boy’s senses.
Indeed, his eyes were empty, without any memories of humanity. Blood seeped from a wound on his head, trailing a thick path of red down his forehead and past his glazed eyes. He had no purpose in his stride or any direction in his movements. All he knew was to go forward. To go forward to some forgotten mission.
A lone figure stood waiting for him at the end of the alleyway. The dull-eyed boy walked towards him, his eyes clinically surveying the possible enemy.
‘Heero.’
The name was unfamiliar to him, yet clearly the boy before him was addressing him. His eyes narrowed and automatically he brought up the gun in his hand.
‘Who are you?’ He inquired emotionlessly.
‘Lower the gun Heero.’ Green eyes clashed with blue. ‘The Enhance system is confusing you.’
He looked at the other boy before him, noting the calm in his face and his peaceful stance. The boy posed no threat. Still, he was in his way, and seemed uninclined to move out of his way. A bullet would solve the problem.
‘Heero...’, the boy’s hand lifted. ‘Remember yourself. There’s someone waiting for you Heero.’
A brief memory of laughter danced in his head. The warmth of a muscular body against his own. And the wetness of tears.
‘No, you’re wrong...’
No one was waiting for him. He had... The gun in his hand wavered as he felt his limbs began to grow heavy. He wasn’t...
Trowa made it to Heero’s side as the boy collapsed. He held Heero’s limp body to his chest, supporting the other’s weight. Heero had fallen unconscious. The extensive loss of blood from his wounds had finally taken effect. Trowa smiled slightly as he looked down at the peaceful face of the dark-haired boy.
‘You’re wrong Heero. Someone is waiting for you, even if he doesn’t know it yet.’
He heard a soft rustle to the side of him. Trowa looked up as the Chinese pilot approached him.
‘Do you need help carrying him?’
‘No, but he needs immediate medical attention.’
Wufei nodded.
‘Should we tell Duo yet?’
‘Later, when Heero is ready for him.’
Duo glared at the wooden door, the note in his trembling hand crushed tightly into a ball. He would kill the bastard. He would definitely kill the bastard who sent him that note. Heero was dead, he knew, and there was no way in hell that the note addressed to him was from his ex-lover. He would send the person who decided to play a sick joke straight to the arms of death himself. Nobody messed with him.
With a violent twist of the door knob, he slammed open the hotel room door. A wave of perfume drifted from the luxurious interior. Despite his anger, the sight that was revealed surprised Duo. The whole interior was decorated with white roses, the perfect buds offset beautifully by leafy green foliage.
‘What the...’
‘Duo.’
At the sound of his name, Duo froze. The rough husky tone. It was so familiar... No, it couldn’t be... could it? Slowly Duo turned towards the sound of the voice. Gentle blue eyes met his own shocked ones.
‘Heero.’ The treasured name slipped unconsciously from his tongue. In disbelief, he reached towards the brown-haired boy before him, as if to clutch at the fantastic vision before him. The boy moved towards him and grasped his hand, pulling Duo towards him. Duo collided with Heero’s chest. Hard, rock solid flesh. ‘It is you. I... you...’ He could not continue. With a muffled sob, he flung his arms around the other boy and hugged him tightly. Duo felt Heero’s arms go around him and tighten.
‘Sorry I lied, Duo. It was for your sake that I did.’
‘Heero... you jerk.’
Test One