13-Dec-2000
This came about because I wanted to write something, but was at a (temporary, I hope!) dead end in everything else, and, lo and behold, 'Freak on a Leash' comes on! I was thinking about the lyrics, and how they would make a really songfic. So, here it is. I decided not to do a traditional songfic, but a series of one-shots (That's something of a contradiction, ne?) using a few lines at a time. Mainly centering around Heero, with a bit of Duo and Relena thrown in on the side. Each should be one and a half or two pages.
May I first say, despite appearances, this is NOT a Heero x Relena fic!
My beta-reader *glomps her* suggested using more thoughts, but I went back over decided that would probably seem obviously inserted, so I'm not doing that for this part. But I may later, cause it makes sense! ^^;;
I don't know much about KoRn, but I believe the lead singer writes the lyrics? (Going by the stereotype) If someone knows otherwise, please email me! Anyway, whoever it is that writes the lyrics is very talented... Enabling me to write evil things like this. Good way for me to take out my own unhappy feelings. PILOT TORTURE!!!
Warnings: General unhappiness, ANGST!!!! Heero being not nice, Oz soldiers being not nice, Duo being not nice...
Pairings: 1xR, slight implications of 1+2 (but not here specifically)
Spoilers: I really don't know
Archive: GW Addiction (Just the song lyrics in italics!)
[Something takes a part of me
Something lost and never seen]
Heero Yuy took the beating silently, ignoring the grunts of the soldiers as they lashed out at him as he ignored the irregular rhythm of his head, back, limbs beating against the unyielding metal supporting him. Sparks flashed in his vision as one struck too hard at his head, the rapid follow up of the blow echoed by the slam of his head against the wall.
He wasn't even sure what they wanted any more, what had started as a simple interrogation session had become a cruel mockery of a game, the soldiers taking out their anger on their restrained victim.
First blood was taken as one soldier opened a knife, the sharp sound of a switchblade echoing in the small room, spattered with dried blood and vomit from previous victims. The metal chair Heero had long since been pulled from was kicked aside, crashing too loudly against the nearest wall.
He rolled dead eyes to the soldier's face as the knife point was pressed to the bass of his neck, the small pit at the center of his clavicle. His face didn't flicker as the soldier's face distorted with macabre glee, the other soldiers watching in morbid fascination as the blood beaded then flowed in a single ribbon down his bruised chest and broken ribs.
Those same eyes, blank and remote as always, stared into the gloom, the small light streaming through the crack under the door lighting them eerily. Heero Yuy had been tossed into an ungainly heap on the now bloody floor of his cell, and there he stayed, not even blinking as his mind dully processed what was happening, both body and brain still too shaken to be strong as he was meant to be. His thoughts slowly traced the previous events, looping over and over every failure, every time he should have done something but didn't.
Fleetingly he realized that there really wasn't anything he could have done, he had been outnumbered and outgunned, his ammunition gone and nothing but a knife left to defend himself with.
However, that thought was quelled immediately, any chance of self forgiveness subdued before it could take a real hold on his slowed conscious. Drilled-in, trained responses kicked in, exiling anything but the customary nothing, taking over in a coup he wasn't even aware of. He was a soldier again, and a damn good one at that, because he could lock himself up so tightly that pieces chipped away every time he turned the key, repress anything human instantly. Unconsciously.
As he was now, lying in an awkward lump, bleeding onto the cold metal of an Oz cell, ignoring all pretenses of self pity, concentrating on nothing, and thinking the same.
He didn't move as the shadows lengthened, disappeared, and reemerged short and indistinct, though all was out of his perception, deep in the bowels of a fortress manned by those who hated him. Never once did he speak, never did he think anything that wasn't self-incriminating.
Tsuzuku...
I know it ends weird, but, well. That's how this scene ends!
Ryan Harbin
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