03-Jan-2000
This fic has lots of Sarah history in it, but that is important for what will happen in later parts. If you can't deal, then don't read.
Her bedroom was a mess. That was the first rational thought the girl could muster. Sarah sat in the middle of her bed and stared around her. Clothes were everywhere, papers were scattered in the same manner, and various items littered the floor. All because of the sobbing young man who lay at the foot of her bed. He wasn’t even a real guy. Duo Maxwell was dead and obviously in a bad mood. Still, the way he was crying set off every maternal instinct Sarah had.
She tried to touch his shoulder only to find her hand moving right through him. The ghost gave a shudder and looked up at her. Slowly, he took in the devastation he had caused.
"I-I’m sorry," he sniffled. "I didn’t mean to wreck your room." He looked so sincere; Sarah didn’t have the heart to be angry with him.
"What happened? I mean. What the hell was that?"
"When I get upset sometimes things happen." Duo shrugged. "I’ve never been that upset before. It was just a shock."
Then it hit Sarah. Duo had said Relena was his killer.
"You said Queen Relena..."
"Well not technically. She had someone else do it, but she was here. I can still hear her laughing." The ghost shuddered. "She just watched the guy beat me to death. I remember her telling me I had no business with Heero. She kept ranting about how I turned him against her. Mostly, I remember how much it hurt."
Duo grew calmer as he told Sarah about his death. It seemed to give him a focus. Something to take his mind of the news of Heero’s marriage. Sarah, however, felt like blowing up by the time Duo finished.
Queen Relena, the great pacifist, the great leader of her age, the woman who showed by example how everyone else should live, was a fake. She had hired someone to beat a young boy to death. As if having someone else do it kept her hands clean. Sarah was fairly shaking with anger.
"Hey, calm down." Duo almost laughed. The girl was all set to go out and fight the Queen of the World over a dead guy she had just met. "There’s nothing you can do."
"Oh, yeah! Who says?" Sarah was already getting dressed. Her uniform had been in the closet and was spared the worst of the damage. It was her first day anyway, so no one would notice if she was a little messy. After loading her gun and finding her shoes, Sarah was ready. Duo, however, stood directly between her and the door.
"I said calm down."
"She has to pay for what she did." Sarah tried to walk around the ghost, but he wouldn’t let her.
"How? Where’s your proof? Witnesses? No one else can see or hear me. You’ll look like a raving lunatic. Hell, I don’t even know where my body is." That got her attention.
Did this girl have a Wufei ‘justice’ complex or what? "After...after I was dead, they took my body and all of my stuff. I tired to follow but couldn’t. Seems like I can’t leave the apartment. Trust me. I’ve tried."
Sarah looked at the floor. "She still has to pay."
"Why? Why is this so important to you? You don’t even know me."
For several moments Sarah said nothing. Duo was sure she was going to ignore the question, but finally the young Preventer faced him.
"I’ve spent most of my life on the streets. Everyday I saw people use the power they had to hurt others. They would have this kind and caring public image and then come down to where I lived so they could indulge themselves. Bastards took what they wanted and no one could do anything. Power has its advantages. " Old pain filled her eyes. "I lost lots of friends before I learned not to trust or
care. It was easier that way. Then Relena came along. She seemed real. Like she really was trying to make things better. I thought maybe, just maybe, this time it would be real. I let myself believe again. Should have known better."
The bitterness in her voice shocked Duo, but he understood. Been there, done that. He’d had his share of loss and betrayal. Still, he couldn’t let her run off and destroy whatever chance she had for happiness. She wouldn’t stand a chance against Relena’s bodyguards. I.E. Heero, Wufei, and Trowa. They’d kill her before she got anywhere near the bitch.
"You won’t stand a chance. Let it go. I have."
"It’s not just about you. I’m not helpless anymore. For the first time in my life I can do something. Maybe I won’t succeed, but I can at least start something." She ran a shaking hand through her hair. "Duo, I have spent my entire life hurting. I closed myself off to stop that. For her and her ideals, I believed. Do you have any idea how hard that was? How painful it was to try? But I did. And look what happened. I ended up working for the bad guys. I swore, with every death I couldn’t stop, that I would never help the powerful, the rich, or those who just plain had it good. God damn it, Duo, I broke that oath for her. Do you understand? I went back on everything I believe for her. Betrayed all my friends, alive or dead, and for what? To find out she’s just like the rest! It was all for nothing! Do you really think I can forgive that? Ever?"
By the time Sarah finished, she was yelling in a strained and harsh voice. Her expression held pain Duo knew only those who have lost everything feel. There was no way he could stop her. He was the same way. But he couldn’t let her go either. ‘Rock and a hard place. Again.’ he thought. ‘Even in death I can’t get away from problems.’
When she began to move again, Duo held his ground. Neither knew what would happen when they collided, but neither would give up. As Sarah touched Duo a surprising thing happened. Duo suddenly knew everything about her. It was as if he lived her life. Sarah went through the same thing. In one instant, she lived Duo’s life.
Everything about the young man was known to her. His battles, training, and his love. Each was drowning in the other; so much so, that it soon became hard to distinguish which memories belonged to whom.
Sarah and Duo panicked. They denied the new memories, trying to force them out of their minds and succeeded with surprising violence. Both were thrown across the room. Duo landed softly, while Sarah hit the living room wall with a loud thud.
The air knocked out of her, the girl lay in a stunned, crumpled heap for several minutes. If she didn’t have bruises in the morning it would be nothing short of a miracle.
"Oi, you OK?" She looked up to see a concerned ghost.
"Shit." Sarah scrambled, crab like, across the floor until she collided with the couch. What ever happened before, a repeat was not in her plans. "Stay the hell away from me."
"I wasn’t going to touch you." Duo grumped. "I just wanted to make sure you were OK. Don’t need two ghosts haunting this place. Crowded enough as it is."
It was a small joke, but it lightened the mood. The two stared at each other for a long time. Each lost in their own thoughts. Finally, the Preventer stood. Her face set. Determination etched in every line. Duo’s jaw hit the floor as she marched right at him.
"Now hold on a minute," he stammered, backing away. Just what did she think she was doing?
"Don’t worry. I just want to try something." She stretched out a hand tentatively. This time she was ready for it. As the memories threatened to overwhelm her, Sarah closed her eyes and used an old concentration technique. In her mind, a wall formed. Solid. Between what was her and what was Duo. Finally, there existed a barrier around the two personalities. Protecting and limiting their interactions, but not preventing it. When she opened her eyes, Duo was
gone.
"Duo?" Worry flashed across her face. What had she done to him? Was he dead? OK stupid question. Had she destroyed his soul? Was that even possible? Where had he gone? The questions raced around her head only to be interrupted by a laughing voice.
"Man this is cool."
"Duo?"
"Yeah. Who else would be in your head?"
In her head? What the? What had she done?
"This is neat. I can see everything you can see. Might want to do some spring cleaning in here though. It’s kind of dusty."
"Duo!" The startled girl squeaked. Laughter was his response. It turned out they could share the same body, but Sarah seemed to be in control. The fact that Duo wasn’t interested in trying to manage a female form helped. As he put it: "I’d have no idea how anything worked. What if you got PMS? I have enough problems without being bitchy. Can you imagine?" For once, the two young people laughed in unison. This was weird but not sinister. As dawn crept over the horizon, the two became more comfortable with the situation.
"Hey. Why didn’t this happen before when you touched me?" Duo wanted to know.
"I think it has something to do with what we were feeling when we touched the second time. We both felt the same thing. I think it gave us a bridge. The third time, I deliberately opened myself up."
"So what do we do now?"
"How about this?" Sarah went to the door.
"Hey! Wait a minute!" The Preventer ignored the protest. Without hesitating, she walked outside. Nothing happened. No pain. No flash of light. Nothing.
"It worked," she breathed.
"What worked?" Duo was shrieking. Talk about a headache. "Do you have ANY idea how much that scared me? I thought I was going to die!"
"Duo," Sarah began reasonably. "You are dead."
"Oh yeah."
"Looks like my theory was right."
"THEORY!" Duo was not taking this well.
"Ouch. Tone it down." Sarah took a deep breath. "When I was a kid, I had this obsession with ghosts. Read every book I could get my hands on. Over time, I came up with lots of theories about how ghosts work. For example, as long as you are in a body, Duo, you can go anywhere. The technical name is possession."
"I don’t think I like that. Makes me sound like some sort of evil demon or something."
"Well you’re not. So chill." Sarah went back to the apartment, grabbed a jacket, and a set of keys.
"What are you up to?" Duo asked.
"Thought we’d go see someone."
"Who?" Suspicion dripped from his voice.
"Well, you wanted to know how King Heero is doing, so I thought we’d start there. We can see how that goes and talk about what needs to be done later. Sound good?"
Duo had to admit that it did. Seeing Heero again would be heaven. Part of him hoped he was happy; yet another part was afraid he was. The inner turmoil came to a screeching halt when he saw Sarah’s mode of transportation. A black motorcycle. This girl just had to be related to Wufei somehow.
Sarah threw on a helmet and gunned the bike to life. She silently explained that the King and Queen lived in the city only about twenty miles from her apartment building. The King had refused to leave the city until he knew what happened to his friend Duo. Some thought he was holding on to the hope that the young pilot would someday come back.
For several minutes, Duo simply reveled in the sensations he could now re-experience. The wind, the new sights, and his heart beat faster knowing he would see Heero again. It had been so long. He was so caught up in what he was feeling, he never noticed the effect it had on Sarah. About ten miles from the apartment, Sarah lost control of the bike just past an intersection. Luckily for both mortal and ghost, it was too early for most people to be up.
The bike skidded about fifteen feet and the rider collided solidly with it. Both were scuffed up, but not seriously damaged. There was no danger of being run over due to the lack of traffic and only a few people even witnessed the crash.
"Damn it, Duo. Will you please control yourself? It’s hard enough driving with my own thoughts as they are, but throw in your problems and I can’t keep it together." In her pain and frustration, she didn’t notice she was speaking out loud. The people around her did though.
A quick check revealed little damage to the bike and a few scrapes to Sarah. Her uniform was a mess, but nothing too bad. Preventer uniforms were made really tough. Finally, she got her bike upright and started. Neither Duo nor she noticed the Preventer who had witnessed the entire scene and was even then making a phone call.
Sarah reached the Royal Palace at about 7 a.m. As usual, the Queen was already out and about. The young Preventer knew, however, that the King would be in his office. Wufei had complained long and loud about the amount of time the King spent locked in the small room. Said it wasn’t healthy. Now all they needed to do was get past his bodyguards.
Thinking quickly, Sarah ran over the schedule in her mind. Quatre would be in an economic meeting with the Queen downtown until noon. Trowa was her bodyguard for the day. That left Wufei, but he would be at the training center waiting for her. Would he ever be surprised. The King never used bodyguards. The Queen left at least ten people with him at all times, however. Sarah remembered thinking once that it was like the Queen feared losing the King.
Today, the head of the retinue would be James Holand. He owed Sarah from a while back. He’d once needed to get his kid sister off the planet. Something about an abusive husband. He would at least take Heero a message. But what should the message be?
"Just tell him about me," Duo said cheerfully.
‘I can just see that now. Do you have a fondness for tight white jackets?’ she thought to him.
"Oh yeah." It wasn’t a bad idea; if you thought about it. She could mention that she had information on Duo. That should get her in. From there she could lie.
"Lie! I don’t lie!"
‘You’re not lying. I am. There’s a difference. Besides, you got a better idea?"
"No."
James stopped her at the door as anticipated. One look at her uniform and the man ushered her inside. His first thought was that she had been attacked. Sarah explained about the accident and the need to speak with King Yuy. Uncertainty clouded the older man’s face until she said the magic words. "Duo Maxwell."
James took her to a small den, pointedly told her to sit, and went to find the King. The King, however, was aware of everything that had passed. As usual. There were video cameras in every room in the house. Every room. Heero was the only one who knew where the cameras were or where to find the control room. Well, Wufei knew, but then he installed them. The minute the girl entered the house, Heero tracked her.
As James came to notify him of the arrival, Heero stared at the figure in the den. The uniform was a disaster, but other than that, she fit her profile. This was definitely the Preventer Wufei recruited. So what had she discovered about Duo? Was this some sort of trick?
Suddenly, the girl turned her head and looked straight into the camera. That was enough to surprise Heero. What sent ice crawling through his blood, however, was the color of her eyes. They were a very familiar shade of violet. Warm, expressive, and smiling. Always smiling. Even her expression was his.
Heero found himself very happy to be already sitting down. It would have been very embarrassing for the King of the World to fall flat on his butt. Then the girl looked away. He quickly typed in the code for the second camera in the room. It revealed nothing unusual about the girl. Her eyes were the color they were supposed to be and her expression was tired. Nothing strange. Had it been a trick of the light? Of his mind? Then it happened again.
The girl was seated in a plush chair. At first, the young Preventer just sat. However, as Heero watched she flung one leg over the side of the chair and leaned back. As if the position was the most comfortable one in the world. It just wasn’t possible. How could she know so much about Duo? Time to call Wufei and get him down here.
Sarah, meanwhile, was lost in silent conversation.
‘What are you doing, Duo?’
‘Just making sure Heero will see us.’
‘Fine, but you’re eroding the wall I put between us. If you keep it up, it’ll break and we’ll have a repeat of the apartment. Why don’t you just tell me what to do?’
‘Because it has to look natural. If I tell you, it would look stilted and Heero would know something’s up. I’ll ease up OK?’
‘Fine. I’m not even going to ask how you knew about the cameras.’ Laughter filled her mind.
Sarah wasn’t really scared, but she was worried. The wall had developed serious cracks and no matter how many times she mended them, they still broke open again. Everything she’d ever read told her that was impossible, but it was happening. Something was wrong. But what? The sound of the den door opening caused Sarah to jump.
Standing slowly, the young woman turned to face the King of the World.
After talking to Wufei, Heero still didn’t know what was going on. The Asian Preventer had received a very confusing phone call about fifteen minutes earlier. An off-duty Preventer had witnessed a crash involving the girl and she had been talking to someone named Duo, however, she was the only one there. Could she have a small mic in her ear? Heero wondered. Such a simple explanation.
Except for the eyes. And the smile. And the way she moved. How to explain those things? Wufei couldn’t. With a promise to be at the Palace in five minutes, Wufei hung-up.
Five minutes gave Heero enough time to talk to the girl alone. More than he needed. Quickly leaving his office, he brushed off James. The older man’s loyalties were firmly with Relena. One too many times, James had followed Heero when the former pilot only wanted to be alone. Now, as far as Heero was concerned, James was simply another annoying part of Relena’s life.
Once Heero reached the den, he discovered a sudden unwillingness to open the door. What if he didn’t like the answers he got? What if Duo sent the girl to tell him to stop searching? What if? What if? What if? So many of those. Years of doubt weighed him down as he grasped the doorknob to the den. Straightening his shoulders, Heero reminded himself that the answers couldn’t be any worse than all these years of not knowing. No matter what he learned, at least he
would know. With all the authority of a true ruler, Heero entered the room.
At first, everything looked normal. The young woman turned to face him. She looked tired, scruffed up, but not sinister. Then things got weird. Her eyes, normally a pretty shade of blue, suddenly shifted to violet. When the change occurred, Sarah placed on hand on her right temple and whimper in pain. Suddenly, the eyes were again blue and then one was blue and the other violet. Shocked, Heero could only stand and watch the remarkable transformation take place.
Sarah had faced King Heero not really knowing what to expect. The man was taller than her and very handsome, in cold sort of way. Duo, however, was not so unaffected. Seeing Heero again removed any restraints he’d held and his consciousness rushed into control. Only when he heard Sarah whimper did he understand what he’d done. The barrier, weak as it was, could not stand the
additional weight Duo placed on it. Shattering with startling violence, it allowed the two personalities to once again mix.
Both minds howled in agony far beyond anything they’d experienced before. Sarah struggled to get the barrier back up, but the pain drown out almost all coherent thought. Desperately, the young Preventer searched for a reason behind the barrier’s lack of success.
With each passing second, she and Duo became more and more one person instead of two. That was it! It had to be! Praying to anyone who was listening, Sarah found a part of herself she’d kept hidden for years and wedged it firmly between Duo and her.
The maelstrom ended. Not just tapered off, but ended so suddenly the silence was like violence. Gasping for breath, Sarah could barely focus. Dimly, she saw Heero looking at her. His normally stoic face held fear and more than a little concern. Some deep instinct told her consciousness was about to become a memory and reacting on another deep instinct, the young woman reached out to the King of World.
"Heero," she whispered. The tone held desperation, fear, pain, trust, and faith. He would help them. He would. Those thoughts faded with her into the darkness. A fleeting feeling followed those thoughts.
It was the feeling of being caught and held in strong, gentle arms. ‘I’m safe,’ echoed in Sarah’s mind and she wasn’t sure if it came from her or Duo or even if there was a separation of the two anymore. Finally, the darkness completely robbed her of anything but numbness.
Heero had watched the battle being fought inside the young woman. Eventually, what ever was going on ended. Her eyes were now a mixture of violet and blue. Not really one or the other. The pain on her face, however, only got worse. With a single word, the girl began to collapse. Not a fake collapse meant to lure the King near but a real boneless fall. Those two things forced Heero Yuy into action. She’d called his name as if it was a lifeline. Only one other person ever gave him that kind of importance. Just as his arms circled her, the den door opened. Wufei stood in the doorway, a stunned expression on his face. Heero didn’t have time for this, so he went into King mode.
"Call Trowa and Quatre. Tell them to meet us at your and Zechs’ house. Tell Sally that’s were you will be for the rest of today and maybe tomorrow. She is not to tell Relena. Same goes for Trowa and Quatre."
"Heero, what..." Wufei began only to be cut off.
"If I knew that I’d wouldn’t feel the need for privacy, now would I?" Heero sighed. He shouldn’t be snapping at Wufei. "Please Wufei, just do as I ask and I will explain everything when we get there. Also, I’m going to need you to distract the guards while I sneak out. OK?"
Wufei nodded. It had been a long time since Heero exhibited this much energy and interest in life. Whatever was going on, might just be worth it to have the old Heero back. Just maybe.