05-Jan-2002
Title: Behind the Scenes of 'Here There Be Dragons'
Author: Lasha Lee
Email: anakerie@cinci.rr.com
Warnings: VERY weird. Bad words.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing.
Jazz's fist flew toward Duo's head, but was caught neatly before it could connect. In spite of his larger size, his arm was twisted around against his back and he found himself face down on the floor, his father straddling him.
"Come on, man. I'm the one who taught you how to fight, remember? Is that the best you can do?" Duo released his son and bounced back on the balls of his feet.
Jazz regained his own feet, warily circling his father. To his increasing rage, Duo was laughing at him. "Come on, big guy." Duo taunted. "Bring it on."
Jazz swung again, this time at his chest. One of Duo's legs snaked out and whipped Jazz's from underneath him, knocking him on his butt. Before the boy could move, a foot was against his throat.
"We could do this all night." Duo shrugged. "You're bigger, but I've got more experience, and I've spent a good part of my life taking down big guys. Now you have one more advantage. That's the fact that you can hit me all you want and I won't do anything in return except knock you down and embarrass you. Because I've never hit you and I'm not going to start now, no matter how much you want me to."
"AND CUT!" The director yelled. "Take five folks."
"Oh thank gawd." Bruce/Jazz sighed. "My rear is SO sore. Did we really have to do that so many times. "And my hair..."
He whipped out a cellphone. "Renaldo, this is Brucie..."
On the other side of the set, Allison/Linra was busy berating her assistant. "EXCUSE me." She held up a bottle of water. "I ASKED for Evian. THIS is Perrier! I do NOT drink Perrier."
"I'm sorry, Ma'am. It won't happen again."
"It better not. You CAN be replaced you know. My daddy can have your spot filled before you get to your car!" She shoved the water back in her assistant's hand. "Now, go get me Evian, if you can remember that!"
Brucie's voice carried over. "Look, Renaldo. I don't care HOW busy you are. My hair is just a mess of frizzies from this heat, and you ARE going to fit me in tonight."
Rick/Duo was stomping around the set, in a very bad mood. One of the toddlers playing the twins barely missed his foot. "Damn kids!" Rick yelled. "GOD I HATE KIDS!" He ripped off the fake braid. "And I hate this damn queer hair!"
"Has anyone seen Steven?" Someone was asking. "We need him to go over a few things for Wufei's next scene."
"He's probably in his trailer having a liquid lunch." Rick snapped. "Where else would he be?"
"Could you go get him?"
"ME? Go get him yourself, asshole. I'm the star, not some damn errand boy!"
"Listen, Renaldo!" Brucie was yelling now. "I SAID WE'RE GOING TO MY MOTHER'S FOR CHRISTMAS! Oh, don't get smart with me, little mister..."
Meanwhile, Hank/Heero was huddled up in a small ball, whimpering. His assistant was stroking his hand.
"You are too good enough." The woman was saying gently. "Everyone loves you."
"I just feel like such a phony at times." Hank sobbed. "I know a lot of other guys wanted this role. Sometimes I feel like I just don't deserve it."
Allison was yelling at her assistant again. "Do these look like fat-free cookies to you???"
"Oh, like that was MY fault, Renaldo! I told you to double-check with the airline!"
"Hey... *hic* issit my turn yet?" Steven/Wufei staggered onto the set, a bottle in his hand. "Less roll."
"Do you think they really like me? Or are they just pretending. Rick says they're only interested in watching him!"
"Damn movie! I swear, the next movie better be all Americans! I'm sick of this diversity crap!" Rick was stuffing donuts into his mouth.
"Okay, places everyone. We're ready to go."
The End
(:./lasha/dragons35)
