Title: Learning the Art of Love, 1/3
Author: tkmaxwell777
Category: Shonen Ai/Het
Pairings: 6x9 (implied), 9+1, 6+1, 1+2
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimers: I borrowed the characters from those Japanese guys. I promise I'll return them only 'slightly' tarnished... well, okay, really tarnished, but much happier :)
Warnings: Possible OOC, Slight Angst
Archived: Yep! Thanks Lev :)
Synopsis: Heero is still trying to find is way after the war. Can Zechs and Noin help him find a way to accept his feelings for a certain braided pilot?
Notes: This fic is dedicated to my wonderful husband who wanted a 6x9x1... it evolved into more than that, but hey, plot happens! I love you, Teddy Bear... you are my best friend and soul mate. SHMILY!
She watched him closely, his messy brown hair slightly damp from his exertion, his tee shirt wet from perspiration. He had been working for over ten hours, and she was once again reminded of his strength and persistence. In the past month, she'd grown to admire him even more than she had during the war. Although he was there for information systems programming, he seemed to find solace in menial labor as well. He had been running soil samples for the past two hours. She still didn't understand why he had shown up there, but when Heero Yuy walks in and asks to help you with a project, you don't turn him down. Noin smiled; it wasn't as if she could say 'no' to anything he'd ask of her anyway.
Although Noin was completely in love with Zechs, she had always felt a strong tie to the Japanese pilot. Heero was an enigma, a complex riddle to be solved. She had thought that he might stay with Relena, or at least with one of the other pilots, but six months after the end of the Mariemaia Incident found him working on the terra-farming project with them instead. Noin could sense sadness in Heero, a longing that needed to be fulfilled, but she didn't know what to do to help the boy. She had a feeling that it was going to require something a little out of the ordinary, but her heart couldn't let her just ignore the other boy's need. She decided to take the first step in what would probably be many. With resolve, she took a deep breath and walked over to the object of her musings.
"Heero, you can't finish this all by yourself. Why don't you let the rest of us do a little?" She smiled invitingly at him as his Prussian blue eyes fell on her.
"I'm almost done for the day."
Noin nodded, her thoughts from earlier reminding her of why she had spoken to him to begin with. "Why don't you get cleaned up and come to our place for dinner?"
Heero shook his head. "You and Zechs should have some time together alone."
Noin frowned. "Heero, I will not take 'no' for an answer. We've been meaning to have you over ever since you arrived, but with the condensers breaking down two weeks ago, then Zechs having to go to that planning commission meeting last week, our schedules went to hell."
"That's why you need time to yourselves," Heero countered, averting his eyes as he wiped his hands on his work jeans. The program he'd written wasn't working like he'd wanted it to. He'd have to fix that over the weekend before the other workers had to use it.
Noin would not be put off. She stepped closer to him and lifted his face so he had to look at her. She felt a slight shiver go through him at her touch, and she wondered if his reaction was due to him being so unused to simple human contact or just because of her. Her smile was tender and warm as she spoke.
"You spend entirely too much time alone, Heero. Please. We want to be your friends, but you have to let us. I wouldn't invite you if we didn't want your company." There was an almost imperceptible flash of emotion in his eyes before the guarded look returned, but she'd managed to see the loneliness he was trying to hide. She'd also seen the fear that made him bury it deep inside.
"You're sure I won't be in the way?" he asked, his voice conveying a little of the conflicting feelings she'd just barely managed to glimpse.
"I'm sure," Noin replied, her fingers releasing his chin with a slight caress. "See you around seven?"
Heero nodded, his look still searching to determine if she really meant what she said. "Hai. Seven."
Noin smiled again then turned from him and left the site to find Zechs. She needed to talk to him before Heero arrived. The Japanese boy's responses had planted the seeds of an idea in her mind as to what they could do to make Heero feel more wanted. If she was right, it could change his life. Noin laughed to herself. "Change is definitely a good thing."
Heero hurried to his apartment. He had left his work area soon after Noin. He was tired and sweaty and just plain irritable. 'Why did I agree to have dinner with them?' he asked himself angrily. He just wanted to be left alone. The little voice inside his head told him that he wanted no such thing, and that he was secretly glad to be leaving the confines of his lonely living space for the evening. If Heero could have, he would have given himself a glare.
The decision to join Zechs and Noin on the colony had been an easy one. Once Relena had explained the project to him, Heero had known he could do something important by working on it. He had thought it would also give him a chance to step away from everything that reminded him of the war so he could finally be rid of the soldier he used to be; unfortunately, the soldier wouldn't let him go that easily.
Heero struggled with the simplest of emotions, still trying to break free of the restraint that had held him a prisoner within his own heart for so long. The touch Noin had graced him with had evoked in him a series of confusing and exhilarating feelings; pleasure, happiness, need and desire had all coursed through him, but fear was the one that overshadowed the others. It wasn't that he was afraid of Noin. Heero had come to respect Noin a great deal. She had always been a strong and admirable woman, and Heero felt that Zechs was truly a lucky bastard to have her. No, the fear Heero felt was one that stemmed from the idea of rejection. Even though he knew that Noin belonged to Zechs, that there was nothing but friendship between them, he was afraid to let himself feel too warmly towards her. His emotions might be indiscriminate from lack of freedom, and he didn't want to risk them getting out of control before he could do anything about it. He didn't want Zechs to have to kill him.
Heero smiled ruefully to himself. Not that Zechs could best him, but Heero felt a bond with the man that he never wanted to lose. He should be glad that they wanted him around after the cold way he had been treating them since he'd arrived. Heero shook his head and headed for the bathroom to shower. For once, he was going to try to enjoy himself, in spite of his fears. Zechs and Noin were trying to make him feel accepted; the least he could do was let them. He might actually find what he was looking for if he did.
"So, what do you think, Zechs?"
Zechs looked at his soul mate in shock. Of all the things she could have proposed, this was certainly in the 'I never would have dreamed she would want that' category. Noin had been outlining her plans for the evening for the past hour. He understood her reasoning, even agreed with it, but Heero...
"Do you think he'll go along with it?" he asked seriously.
Noin laughed. "I think he will once he realizes why, but he'll need a lot of coaxing and probably a written statement from you insuring his life," she replied, her dark eyes twinkling with humor.
Zechs chuckled. "You're probably right about that, Noin."
They sat in amiable silence while Zechs pondered the complexities of the offer they were going to make to the other boy. There were certainly many variables that could spell disaster rather quickly, but Zechs found himself dismissing them when he thought about doing something to actually make Heero Yuy happy. He owed the pilot a great deal, for things even he couldn't explain to himself, so it wasn't really a hard decision to make.
"If he will let us, then I am willing."
"Oh, Zechs," Noin said as she threw her arms around the man that held her heart. She'd known she could depend on him to see past what anyone else would see and be open to her ideas. "Thank you. It means so much to me, and I know that Heero will never be able to express his gratitude."
Zechs could think of one way, but it would be up to Heero to decide whether he would or not. Zechs didn't know how the other pilot would respond even if everything went according to their plans. He knew that Noin had always been fond of Heero, and Zechs could never deny Noin the pleasure of doing something so important for someone she cared about. He smiled as he thought of her generosity. A buzz at the door brought him out of his thoughts as Noin went to answer it. He watched as Heero Yuy walked into their living room, with a dark blue tee shirt and dark blue jeans on, his hair as wild as ever.
"I'm glad you could make it, Heero. I'm looking forward to an interesting evening."
Heero blinked at the odd greeting. He noticed an unfamiliar look in the blonde's eyes, and although it wasn't unpleasant, he felt his face flush for some reason. The other man was wearing a pair of khaki pants and a light blue button down shirt; Heero thought that Zechs definitely looked more at home in casual attire than all of those uniforms he'd worn while with Oz, White Fang, or the Preventers.
Heero turned his attention back to Noin and saw the brightness of her eyes at his presence. It made him feel good to know that they seemed to really want him to be there. She was wearing a pair of light blue jeans and a white v-neck tee shirt. Heero tried not to notice how tight and low cut the shirt was as she greeted him.
"Thank you for coming, Heero." She tried not to laugh at her choice of words, but failed to hide a smile.
"Thank you for inviting me," he said simply, giving Noin a small smile in return before looking at Zechs.
Zechs motioned for him to sit down in the chair opposite him on the couch as Noin went into the kitchen to check on the food. Zechs was glad to have a moment alone with Heero to make his own observations of the boy to compare them with what Noin had told him she'd noticed.
"Noin and I want you to feel at home here. I have to say that you've been doing an extraordinary job. We're even a few days ahead of schedule because of your efforts."
"You have good people working here with you, Zechs," Heero commented, uncomfortable with the praise.
Zechs didn't miss the other boy's unease. 'So he can't take a compliment any more than he can accept failure.' He watched as Heero tensed under his scrutiny. Zechs' crystal blue eyes took in the other boy's features; beautiful deep blue eyes, finely arched eyebrows, tanned skin, and full lips completed a face that anyone would define as handsome. Heero's body had filled out some in the last few months too. He was taller, his muscles more defined, even though he kept his lean build, and his long legs were well shaped and contoured. For the life of him, Zechs couldn't figure out what kept Heero from being chased all over the colony by throngs of admirers, guys and girls alike. Looking into those fierce eyes solved that mystery; Heero didn't let anyone get close enough. Noin was right about what the boy needed.
"No one has worked as hard as you have, Heero."
Heero didn't like being patted on the back for something that was just his job to do. He didn't understand why the other man was acknowledging him so much. It wasn't that he didn't want to be known for doing something well; he just didn't want to be overly noticed. It made him feel as if people felt they owed him something, and he didn't want that at all. He didn't want someone responding to him out of gratitude. It always made him feel so empty inside.
"You and Noin have worked ten times as hard as I have, Zechs. If anyone should be given credit, it's you. You took this project and made it work. That was a daunting task, and I don't know if anyone else could have completed it."
Zechs laughed. "You've helped us so much along the way, Heero. I don't mean to continue to compliment you, but your ideas and continued ingenuity have been invaluable. You should be proud of the work you've done here with us, and I'm not just saying that to flatter you. I mean every word of it. It's nice to know that we have a friend we can count on. I just hope things continue to go well. We haven't completed it yet."
Heero felt a little of the tension melt at the other's words. Zechs saw him as a friend, not just a fellow worker; it made the praise easier to accept. "Yes, but you will. You always accomplish what you put your mind to, or have you forgotten Siberia?"
Zechs gave the former Wing pilot an affectionate grin. "No. I could never forget that."
Heero smiled back at him. They had fought each other out of respect and honor. It seemed like such a long time ago, but Heero could still taste the crisp air, hear the whirring sounds of Heavyarms as he'd battled, and feel the intensity of being locked in a fighting embrace; he had never felt so alive. Heero knew a kind of loss as he realized those heightened senses would never claim him again. There were no more battles to fight, and he was left with bland senses that held no joy.
"Dinner's ready," Noin announced as she came back into the room.
Heero followed them into the dining room and took in the elaborate setting. There was roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, rolls and butter, and a bottle of wine on the cherry wood table. "You shouldn't have gone to this much trouble, Noin." He wanted to say more, but didn't know the right words.
"Heero, it was no trouble. Believe it or not, I love to cook." When she saw the Japanese boy raise an eyebrow, she added, "I know, I know. I've been domesticated." She flashed a wide smile at Zechs who chuckled openly.
"The day you're domesticated is the day my little sister becomes a Preventer."
Even Heero had to snort at that. He watched a knowing glance pass between the two lovers as they sat down, and he felt a longing inside. It must be wonderful to feel so connected with someone, to know what the other person is thinking. There was only one person he knew kind of like that, and that boy was on L2 right now. Heero thought about bright violet eyes, chestnut hair, and a wide grin; suddenly he wished the braided baka was there with them.
Noin took in the emotions flitting across Heero's face unaware. 'I wonder what he's thinking about.' She then reminded herself that conversation was needed. "So, Heero, have you heard from the guys recently?"
Heero flushed as he realized he had just been thinking about one of them in a slightly more than friendly way. "Not recently, no." He then added as an afterthought, "I spoke with Quatre the day I left Relena's."
"What about Duo?" Noin asked, watching, as Heero's face seemed to flush more. She smiled to herself. So it was like that, was it? She was beginning to piece this puzzle together, if only the outside border.
"No. He went back to scrap yard."
If there was one thing Noin prided herself on, it was sensing the underlying meanings in other people's words. She knew immediately that Heero meant, "No. He went back to Hilde". She could hear the tinge of jealousy in those words and the feeling of some implied rejection; herein lay Heero's problem.
"I ran into him while I was on L2 for the conference," Zechs said conversationally, completely unaware of the separate little reveries going on in Heero and Noin's heads regarding the former Deathscythe pilot.
"Really?" Noin breathed, trying to get Zechs to look at her so he could see the importance of this little tidbit of information. When his gaze met hers, she gave him a look that conveyed as much.
Zechs raised an eyebrow but nodded. "Yes."
Heero felt his breath catch, but kept his voice impassive. "How was he?"
Zechs turned his attention back to the dark haired boy and noticed the tense posture despite the uncaring tone of his question. Zechs then realized what Noin had; Heero was interested in the other boy, and not just as a friend either. That revelation made Zechs feel a little better about his involvement in what was to take place later that night if all went well. He also knew he had some very good news for Heero.
"He was doing well. He said he was living alone in a two-bedroom apartment near the yard. He was glad to hear that you were okay, but he seemed a little surprised that you and Relena weren't together. He told me that Hilde was about to get engaged to one of the men who worked for them." Zechs watched as Heero's head shot up to look at him, the shock evident on his face. The other boy didn't know what to say.
Noin wanted to drag her blonde lover into the other room and ravish him until he couldn't breathe. She hadn't known about this development with Hilde, but it would certainly make it easier to get Heero to admit to his feelings for Duo, and allow the two of them to help Heero give into them. She had an even more definite idea of what Heero needed now.
Dinner progressed, more conversation mixed with reminiscing. Heero's heart soon calmed, and he allowed himself to relax and enjoy the couple's company. His mind would bring up the information Zechs had told him about Duo every now and then, and Heero would force it away so he could concentrate on important things like not knocking over his glass, not getting his napkin in the gravy, or generally not embarrassing himself while he ate; clumsiness seemed to follow him into social situations where a mission wasn't a concern. He could attend a state dinner and never falter, but place him in someone's home, as a regular guest, and he suddenly became a two-year-old.
When dinner was over, they retired to the living room for coffee. Heero found himself sitting in the chair again, across from Zechs and Noin, who were on the couch. He sipped the hazelnut liquid and felt the warmth fill his soul. Even though he had been nervous, he had enjoyed dinner immensely.
"The food was wonderful, Noin," Heero commented as he set his cup down on the table next to him. Talking with them about the past had made Heero feel like they had more in common, and it was comforting. He felt like they understood him, and it was nice just be wanted because you were you. He realized that he felt that way with the other pilots too; he'd just never allowed himself to admit it before. Maybe he should visit them. Thoughts of Duo hugging the breath out of him made him smile.
"All right," Noin said when she noticed that Heero had zoned out again. "There's another smile. You've been thinking about something every so often all evening, and I want to know what is causing such a beautiful expression on that normally stoic face of yours."
Heero started at her comment. Since he couldn't admit that he was envisioning his former partner showing him affection, he returned to his original thought. "I've really enjoyed tonight," he replied softly, then decided to share with them how much the evening had really meant to him. "I didn't knock over my wine, break any dishes, or get any food on my clothes. It truly was a success for me."
Zechs chuckled. "Don't tell me that Mr. 'I saved the world twice' is afraid of disgracing himself socially."
Heero flushed slightly, but found himself smirking at Zechs' statement at the same time. It was rather amusing to think that he was so afraid of being around people like this. "Disgracing? No. Making it so no one invites me back again, well, that's a possibility. People only possess so many china plates, ne?"
They all laughed at that, and Heero felt himself relax even further. He could really get used to this. They made him feel like he was allowed to be awkward, that they would still respect him regardless.
"Heero, I will gladly let you break every piece I own if you will keep coming back," Noin said softly, her eyes softening as she took in his almost vulnerable expression at her words.
Heero felt his heart flutter a little at that. No one had ever wanted him around that much... well, except Duo, maybe. 'Why can't I quit thinking about him tonight?' Heero thought to himself, a little disgruntled that he couldn't bring his emotions under control where the other boy was concerned. His expression changed from amused to frustrated in a moment.
Noin could see that Heero was fighting with his feelings again. 'Well, it's now or never, it seems,' she thought as she decided to move towards the next phase of the evening.
"Heero, we didn't just invite you here for dinner. Zechs and I want to do something for you."
Heero went on the defensive automatically. "What do you mean?"
Zechs took Noin's lead, leaning forward as he spoke, his body language open and relaxed. "We know that you've been struggling with finding your place since the end of the war, Heero. You seem to be trapped within yourself, and no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to break free. We'd like to help you do that, if you'll let us."
Heero looked from Zechs to Noin. "I don't quite understand," he said, trying to keep himself calm. He had actually been enjoying himself, and now... well, he was on guard again.
Noin moved to where she was on her knees in front of Heero as he sat in the chair. His eyes riveted to her, and she felt a surge of anticipation as she spoke. "We want to help you let go of the restraints that keep you from getting close to people, Heero. Zechs and I want to teach you how to touch and be touched without fear of being hurt."
Heero's gaze locked with Noin's. This couldn't be happening, could it? He looked back at Zechs and saw the blonde nod his head, his eyes full of just as much affection as Noin's held. "Touch?"
Noin rested a hand on Heero's thigh, feeling him tense immediately. "Touch, Heero. We want to show you how it feels to be wanted. We want you to see what it's like when two people are in love. We also want you to experience the feeling of being satisfied by someone who cares for you."
"Do you mean, sexually?" Heero's voice broke uncharacteristically, his upset apparent. It wasn't that he was angry, or even unwilling; he was just shocked as hell.
"We both want to do this, Heero," Zechs reassured him, seeing behind Heero's mask for the first time. It was amazing, and he couldn't wait to see the boy stripped of it completely.
Heero swallowed hard. This was unbelievable! He'd never thought that they would want to do something like this, that they cared so much about him to include him in their intimacy. He had to admit that if he could see them make love to each other, it might help him overcome his inability to express himself like that. He could watch how they responded to each other. It might even help him identify those emotions in someone else more easily. And if they could teach him how to...
"Will you let us help you, Heero?" Noin asked, her hand rubbing Heero's thigh in soft circles.
Heero felt himself respond to the slow motions. He closed his eyes, and immediately the image of a longhaired violet-eyed boy filled his mind. If they could help him, then maybe he could go to Duo and see if there was a chance with him. Heero opened his eyes to look into those of Lucrezia Noin, and smiled.
"Mission accepted."
End Part 1
(:./tk/arts1)
