16-Jul-2000

Title: Ocean's Seduction by Draco (dracostella@hotmail.com)
Disclaimer: Not my characters. You will only get neko mimi if you sue me.
Rating: PG
Warnings: Hmmmm... well I guess lime, but hmmm, not really. Yaoi, angst
Notes: Short little piece on Heero and Duo and the ocean. This is the first time I wrote something like this...
Feedback: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!! All C&C welcome!

Ocean's Seduction by Draco

The ocean reached out longingly for the shore. For a brief moment, the two lovers embrace, only to be separated again. Forever caught in an unfulfilling dance, and trapped by star-crossed desires. They continue on. Sacrificing everything for that moment, when the ocean kisses the sand.

Time sweeps by them without meaning, yet an irony as great as their love was taking place near them. The cursed lovers watch as Angel's wrath and Death's instrument join in a tango against machines without souls. Orange fires flare from them as if they were trying to imitate the sunset. Out of the flames, only angel and death remain. The battle was but a second in the ocean's remembrance, but the allure of the ocean's peace becomes embedded in the angel's memory of war...

Peace. Heero had chanted it like a mantra during the war. Peace. He had fought and killed in her name. Peace. Peace is here. Yet Heero felt none of the sweetness that accompanied the word. He felt empty, drained, alone. Those eyes still haunt him. The kind voice, the crumpled flower. The screaming... everything remained. For a while, a soft face, and strong blue eyes had kept them away. For a short time, long blonde hair and a caring heart kept him sane. Yet, they were temporary blessings... the calm in the eye of the storm.

He was a soldier without a war. He had lost his way long ago, now he wanders through a darkness that can never be lifted. He was terribly tired, and the ocean was calling out to him. The ocean was welcoming him, offering him relief in its cool darkness. Heero gave himself to its enticing embrace. Heero approached his savior. Soon there would be nothing left of a shatter soul. Soon there will be euphonious release from the screams...

The water felt so cool against his feet, his calf, his legs, his waist...

Somewhere distant someone was calling his name. Heero ignored it and let the ocean take him, drowning in soft oblivion.

"DAMN, HEERO, BREATHE!" Duo demanded as he pushed against Heero's chest.

Duo lifted Heero's head, lending Heero his own breath.

With desperate hands, Duo pounded on Heero's chest.

Heero coughed. Water frantically escaping from his lungs. The sharp pain of living crept on to his consciousness before he allowed himself to drown once more in darkness.

Heero didn't know how long he was out. He only knew he failed his mission. He kept his eyes closed unwilling to face the reality of earth. Not far away he could still hear the call of the ocean. Still waiting for him.

"You are finally awake," a familiar voice said.

"Duo?" Heero whispered incredulously.

"Saved by the god of Death himself."

With a deep breath, Heero opened his eyes. A fire burnt silently by his side. The day was already consumed by the night. All that offered light was the small struggling flames. By the fire was all of Duo's clothing, and all of his clothing...

"Duo, why am I... "

"Because you-stupid-son-of-a-bitch, I didn't know someone planned to drown himself. We were both soaking wet and I didn't want to die of pneumonia," Duo's voice was raw with anger and bitterness.

"Why are you here?" Heero asked calmly ignoring Duo's emotions.

"Relena called all of us to ask us to find you. She was worried about you. I guess she was right," Duo's eyes were focused on the fire, unwilling or unable to look at Heero.

Heero allowed the silence to settle in. It didn't really matter. Duo could not watch Heero forever, and Relena certainly couldn't lock him up. Heero Yuy always finished his mission.

"You are a complete idiot, you know that?" Duo broke the silence.

Heero looked away.

"Why do you want to kill yourself? And don't you dare tell me you were out for a swim!" Duo threw two diving weights to Heero's side, "I found these on you. And you sure the hell weren't diving!"

In the darkness, Heero could still see the ocean. Every single part of his being longed to be a part of it... how he would love to melt into its gentle rhythms.

"Damn it Heero, it's peace time!" Duo's voice cracked a little, causing Heero to look his way. Duo's hand shook ever so slightly as he adjusted the wood in the fire.

"How did you find me?" Heero finally asked. Next time, he would have to make sure no one found him.

"I didn't think I would," Duo told the fire, "I thought for sure Quatre or Trowa, or even Wufei would find you, but not me. I didn't think... damn it I'm babbling... "

Duo shivered against the ocean breezes. His pale skin dyed with borrowed orange glow.

"This is where they buried the remnants of Wing Zero," Duo whispered so softly the wind strained to hear it.

"It seemed fitting."

Duo walked over to Heero and physically shook him, "WHY?! After all we been through, why now?"

"Because I have outlived my usefulness; there is no purpose in my continued being," Heero's cold eyes met with fiery violets.

Duo dropped the naked Heero into the sand. Slowly he walked toward the ocean, staring into its darkness. He seems to be searching for something in its unfathomable depth. Searching for the words...

"Everyone has some purpose in being here," Duo's voice floated towards the waves, "You saved earth itself. You, more than any one else deserve to live. What happened Heero? How did you end up here?"

The night was apathetic against Heero's exposed skin.

"Here we stand naked Heero," Duo faced his once comrade once more, "There are no more barriers Heero. No more secrets. Tell me, Heero."

"I already told you. I have already done my duty. There is nothing left for me... "

"Bullshit, Heero," Duo moved closer, "What do you think you are doing? Atoning for your sins?"

Heero hid his face in the darkness. Yes. He was receiving a just reward for his sins.

"That is it, isn't it?" Duo advanced slightly, "For all the innocents whose blood is on our hands. We all have stained our hands Heero. If you are going to take yourself out, why don't you take the rest of us with you?"

Abruptly, Duo stormed towards the ocean. He picked up a small rock and recklessly threw it into the ocean. In the darkness, he could not see where it landed, but he heard its plunge when the water protested at the intrusion.

"You think you are the only one, Heero?" the wind shuddered at the edge in Duo's voice, "You think none of us thought about our guilt? You think it's easy for the rest of us to look at an orphan and wonder if we made them that way? You think the rest of us don't have skeletons in the closet? I have got the world's worst case of survivor guilt Heero. Did you know that? Don't you know that Quatre still wakes himself up screaming with nightmares about the colonies he destroyed... "

"Where is Trowa?" Heero remained unaffected by Duo's rage.

Duo's eyes narrowed slightly, "What?"

"He's with Quatre, isn't he." It was a statement, not a question, "and you live with Hilde."

"And you are alone," Duo walked back towards Heero, "Is that why Heero? Because you are lonely? Damn it Heero, if you just said so, you can come and live with any of us! You have Relena! She loves you!"

"No, she admires me. I am her hero," Heero's voice was not unkind, "To her I am the symbol of hope. I appeared when her father died, and somehow I gave her hope. She believes in me, but she does not love me."

"Everyone believed in you," Duo's voice lowered, "Everyone put their hope in you. You were everyone's one chance for life. Even when they first met you, they believed in you. Quatre, Relena, Sally... they all did... "

Duo edged closer to Heero. The air between them fled to bring them closer together.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better Heero," Duo's callused hands pulled Heero's head to face him, "I never had such faith in you. You are human like the rest of us. You make mistakes too. You are not infallible no matter how many seemingly impossible the things you do. You are not the god everyone thinks you are, so stop punishing yourself for being imperfect!"

The touch, the honesty was too much, and Heero had to close his eyes.

"Theirs not to make reply; theirs not to reason why; theirs but to do and die," Duo recited as he pulled Heero into a chaste embrace.

Their skins burning against each other, "That's a line from a poem by some famous old guy. He's talking about soldiers, Heero. He's talking about us. We fought so the weaker wouldn't have to. We are not the saviors everyone is making us to be. Stop punishing yourself Heero for not being the perfect soldier, the perfect man that everyone seems to think you are. You are not. You are a giant idiot. Trust me. I know you better than they do."

"I tried," Heero muttered into Duo's chest, his voice drained of emotion still, "I tried living. For a year after White Fang, I tried to live a normal life. Then came more fighting. And for a brief moment, I was useful again. In peace, I have no existence Duo. Let me die."

"I will never let you die, Heero," Duo jerked Heero up so they are face to face, "I swear to God, as long as I live I will never let you die."

The wind stilled himself to watch the two friends. The ocean advanced closer to see what would happen next. The air held its breath waiting for...

Duo kissed Heero. Heero suddenly felt powerless as Duo's mouth poured over his. Heero felt himself drowning again. He felt the same pain when he was able to breathe again.

"To me you have never been the perfect soldier, the hope for humanity! Just Heero... just you. Ai shiteru, Heero," Duo whispered, "don't ask me when or how or why, because I don't know. I just decided that after I thought you were fish food. And I will be damned if I let someone else I love die again."

The wind sighed in relief.

Heero's entire body was limp against Duo's hold. Duo held him, "I'm so tired of being the Shinigami." Duo talked into Heero's soft brown hair. "You are tired of being the perfect soldier, the fallen angel."

Duo's hand slid down Heero's back, caressing it with the gentleness of the sea breezes. "Let's unmake each other... ne?"

Carefully, Duo laid Heero back into the sand, "Onegai?"

Heero stared into Duo's dark blue violet eyes, calling out to him... like the ocean... a promise of silence... a promise of...

Heero slowly nodded. Duo smiled slightly and kissed him again. Less desperate this time, more gentle. Their naked flesh pressed against each other with heated friction.

The ocean rose with passion. With each tide, its cool waters thrust deeper into the shore. With each thrust the ocean washed away the scars of the shore. The fervent waters drowned the past marks on the sand's surface.

The ocean brushed closer and closer until it engulfed them and extinguished the fire. Sand greedily poured over them. But neither boy cared. The heat from Duo's body kept Heero warm against the cold water. But sea was persistent as it tried to tempt and seduce the boy to join them once more, to become one with ocean... he had come so close before... but they were too late... another had already claimed the boy.

"I love you, Heero Yuy," the other whispered to the ocean's lost prize.

Heero smiled, his body half submerged in the water. The ocean had drowned the soldier, and the boy was baptized for a new chance to live.

-owari

Ne, ne? What do you think? My first pseudo-poetic piece...

(:./draco/ocean)