It was an ordinary day when this reporter walked into her local Toys 'R Us (TRU - better known as "The Toy Store that Swallowed Your Town!") I didn't realize it, but I was about to get the surprise of my life. Not only was the the Big Bland Store selling gundam models, but they were the mech from Gundam Wing! Thinking nothing could be better, I glanced up from the Epyon kit I was drooling over and found myself looking into ice-blue eyes surrounded by platinum-blond hair. "They don't have Tallgeese," the vision said with a frown. "I'll have to speak to the manager about this." With a flash of pale gold hair he was gone, but the fun was just beginning as I began to spot GW characters in every aisle...
Zechs had appeared to be in no mood for chit chat as he strode down the toy aisles to the customer service center. I watched him take hold of the night manager by that little blue vest all the employees wear and was about to cover my eyes when I heard a loud "whoooo hooo!!!" and was knocked to the floor by something flying past me. From my new vantage point on the floor all I could see of my attacker was a flash of rollerblades following a meter-long braid around the corner of the toy car aisle. Should of known it - that Maxwell kid is nothing but trouble.
"Out of the way, stupid onna!!" came the shrill command from behind me. I had just gotten up to a standing position after encountering hurricane Duo when I was sideswiped by a typhoon known as the Chinese Dragon. He was pedaling one of those fancy girls' bikes with clean white tires and pink-and-silver streamers off of each handlebar. He had a Star Wars Episode One Light Saber (the double-ended Sith kind) in the little basket up front and was hightailing after Duo for some unknown reason. (I didn't *even* want to know...)
I had just decided that the model aisle was too much of a combat zone and had begun to leave when I was pushed back into it by a mob of five of the ugliest men it has even been my misfortune to know. They all wore lab coats of one kind or another and each had a rather maniacal gleam in his eye. "Aha! There's Epyon!" screeched one of them, snatching the small box out of my hand with a steely claw. The other four huddled around him, peering down at the cover of the box and making appreciative "ooh" and "aah" noises.
"But wait!" cried one with a nose the size of the Washington Monument. He swept his gaze over the rows of model plans and space vehicles, causing two of his colleagues to dive to the ground lest they be decapitated. "Look at all these other designs! What if we borrowed a few of these ideas, eh?" The five of them were reaching greedily for a scale model of Annikan Skywalker's pod racer when I left them, backing away carefully so they wouldn't hear me leave. I made it to the end of the aisle and ran like the wind to what I believed to be the relative safety of the board games. Only then did I hear the low chuckle that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end...
"It couldn't be," I whispered to myself. "Surely not him..." I turned around and saw Treize Khushrenada sitting at a folding game table. He seemed to be challenging the store's customers to games of Risk, and had drawn quite a line of armchair megalomaniacs intent on showing him up with their skills. I asked one of the women in line what she was doing.
"Oh, it must be some kind of promotional event - they even have him dressed up in the right costume for the era!"
The man standing in front of her sneered and replied, "Sure he looks like a general, but what kind of experience does he have, huh?" If only you knew, I found myself thinking.
I strolled up to Treize and leaned down, whispering into his ear, "General, remember these are civilians - you will be kind won't you?"
He looked up, a smile of bemusement on his face. "My dear lady," he said graciously, patting my hand, "this is all about war and conquest. Why should we have need of kindness when there is such nobility and honor spread out before us!" He gestured elegantly at the game board before him, his smile a dazzling thing, then proceeded to annihilate the entire African contingent of his hapless opponent's army. I walked away, shaking my head, as the General said in his velvet tones, "Now, let's talk about the Indian Sub-continent, shall we?"
End of Part 1
(:./kumiko/toysrus1)
