29-Sep-2004
Title: I Dream Of Houdini
Author: Muffie
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, its characters, its quotations, or its plotlines. They belong to the Sotsu Agency who owns their trademark, Bandai who licenses their use, and, of course, the guy who created them. I am neither receiving payment for this work, nor will I accept any. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warnings: Fluffy! And Moonies. And chaps. Post EW.
Spoilers: None
Rating: R (for nudity and Heero's ninmu-in-progress smile)
Pairing: 2+6 (pick your derivation), 1x5 (or maybe 5x1?)
Archives: www.gwaddiction.com,
Notes: Sequel to "Moonie Cult Recruiting Pamphlet" and a slightlier hentai entry into the Fluff contest.
Duo smirked, dropped to his knees, and surrendered both of his arms to Wufei. "Don't be such a girl about it, pookie bear."
"Wrong again."
"Sugarlips?"
Wufei snorted and did something behind Duo that covered both of his arms from the heels of his palms to his elbows in stiff leather. Buckles jingled merrily while Wufei locked the leather restraints in place and hooked them together.
"Oh come on, studpuppy, you can do better than this."
"Studpuppy? I don't think so, Maxwell."
Heero grunted from across the room. "Baka."
"You can't call him that, Heero, that's your pet name for me." He frowned into his blindfold. "Do I hear a laptop?"
"Baka," Heero said again.
Wufei removed his shoes and socks for him and settled thick, leather shackles onto his ankles.
He rolled his eyes. "Please, don't insult me, here, precious."
"Try again," Wufei said mildly, kicking his feet apart. A solid, metallic thunk preceded the sounds of his ankles getting chained to a spreader bar.
"Ooh, kinky. Lemme guess, your pet name is slave?"
Wufei didn't reply.
"No way! Don't tell me Heero is the slave?"
"Baka," Wufei growled. "You're wrong. On both counts."
Huh. "Then why do you got this stuff in your hotel room, beautiful?"
"Ever hear of variety, baka? And it's not beautiful." Wufei used something, probably rope or leather since it didn't sound metallic, to bind his armcuffs to the shackles on his ankles. "Finished."
Heero grunted. "Clear here. Target sighted."
Duo frowned. "Clear? Target?"
"Thirty minutes, Maxwell?"
Duo tested the bonds. "Yeah, if that much."
He could practically hear Wufei smirking at his back. "Very well, then. Once you've been gagged, you will have forty minutes to meet us in the hotel dining room, Houdini. If you fail, you must perform the forfeit of my choice. If you win, you will--"
"Video! At least thirty minutes of quality Perfect Soldier and his Wuffles porn!" He grinned and would have rubbed his hands together if he'd been able. "Ooh, I can't wait to see you guys in action!"
"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," Heero growled.
"Don't worry, Heero. Maxwell will lose."
"Do bet on that, Wuffers, please do." His grin turned positively lascivious.
"You are such a pervert, Duo," Heero said. Right, like Bondage King Wu's lover wasn't a perv? "We're at ten."
"Roger." Wufei slipped a ball gag into his mouth, but he really wasn't paying attention. Ten? Wha--?
"We should have stripped him first," Heero groused. He was probably pout-- Wait a minute. Stripped?!
Wufei snorted. "It was far simpler to bind him with his cooperation." There was a soft snick, kind of like the sound a pocket knife makes when it's opened up. Something really thin and really cold touched his collarbone.
"Mmmm!" he yelled, flailing enough to fall on his face if Heero hadn't caught him.
"Hurry up, count is at nine," Heero said flatly.
"I'm working on it, Yuy." A few precise and economical movements of that thin, cold knife accompanied the sound of splitting cotton. His shirt sagged and then drooped off of him. Holy shit! Those kinky bastards! Wufei was still hacking at his shirt with the knife, the hands undoing his slacks must be Heero's. One seam ripped open clear down his left leg. Yep, definitely Heero's. The other seam ripped and the knife made short work of his waistband. Maybe it was a good thing he went commando today.
"He needs a left front pocket," Heero said out of the blue. What? A pocket?
"I have planned for that contingency." He could hear the smirk in Wufei's voice just as plain as day. Wufei's cat-like footsteps retreated, and then returned, along with the sound of more jingling buckles.
Heero grunted. "Good idea. We're at seven. Stand up, Duo." And just how in the heck was he supposed to do that? Heero bodily lifted him to his feet where he stood swaying. "What are those for?"
"I thought they might look cute on him." Fuck, Fei's voice was sexy when he was all evil sounding like that. Other than Wufei's evil little chuckling, they silently worked to dress his lower half in something that felt rough and heavy, if supple. It snapped, zipped, and jingled until it clung to his legs from shackles to hips. And left his butt and his, uh, front parts, dangling out in the wind. Kind of like Wufei's uber-sexy motorcycle chaps. He squealed and jerked when someone's hand grabbed a hold of his favorite dangly part. Something wrapped around the base and snapped. What the hell? Something else wrapped around his neck and buckled shut.
Okay, he was as perverted as the next guy, but this was a little fucking much. "Mmm!"
Heero ignored him in favor of saying, "Four."
"The key?"
"Laptop."
Key? Laptop? What the--? "Mmm?" Heero didn't bother to answer him, just slung him over his shoulder and started walking. The door, the one to the hotel hallway, the main hotel hallway where any number of people that knew him could at that very moment be marching around just waiting to see his naked ass draped over Heero fucking Yuy's shoulder, opened up. "Mmmm! Mmmmm!" No fucking way! He hadn't agreed to this!
Heero smacked him on the ass. "Quiet, baka, before someone hears you."
He shut up.
A lock clicked and another door was opened. The room was warmer than the hall and smelled faintly of a familiar sandalwood, musk, and conditioner. Familiar enough to parade images of tall, blonde, and gorgeous through his brain. Shit, he was starting to get a semi. Oh, he was so going to get even over this. Heero dropped him to the carpet and pushed him down to his knees. One of them messed with his hair.
"Two," Heero said.
Wufei giggled from what sounded like another room. That insane Chinese dickhead fucking giggled. "Remember Maxwell, forty minutes or you lose." And then the door quietly clicked shut.
He listened intently for a few moments, long enough to determine that he was completely alone. First, free his arms, then his legs, then hunt down those two bastards and get all Shinigami on their perverted asses. Scratch that, get dressed, then hunt down those two bastards and get all Shinigami on their perverted asses. He'd just about worried the first buckle open on his arm restraints when the door clicked again. Wufei coming to gloat some more. Bastard!
" ...Unification Church?" someone muttered. Zechs!
Duo froze and desperately hoped that he would be missed. Maybe if he didn't move, he'd look like a coffee table and the walking wet dream wouldn't notice him in this completely mortifying position. Oh, man, Wufei was going down for this! The door quietly clicked shut and there were a few ordinary sounds, a coat tossed over a chair, keys dropped on a table, footsteps coming closer. Fuck!
"Why would someone tape a Moonie cult recruiting pamphlet to my door?" Was there someone with Zechs? Duo strained to hear, but couldn't pick up anything but Sex--Zechs, dammit, Zechs. Wait. A Moonie cult recruiting pamphlet?! Oh fuck! The paper rustled a bit. "Oh my," Zechs chuckled. "I may have to look into the Moonies."
Down south, a certain part of his anatomy wasn't the least bit shy about agreeing with Zechs. Perfect, beautiful Zechs. Duo squeezed his eyes shut and forced himself to think about Dr. G in a tutu. Little Scythe didn't go down. Funny, even Dr. G in a labcoat was usually enough to--snap. Cockring. Wufei, you prick!
"Seven. Left front pocket?" The footsteps padded into the room with him. They came to a shocked halt and the blonde fantasy sucked in a sharp breath. "D-Duo?"
He let his head drop since there really wasn't anything else he could do. Maybe Zechs wouldn't really notice. Maybe Zechs wouldn't laugh at him. Of course not. He was too polite. Zechs would just pat him on the head and send him on his way. Then he would laugh at him.
"Hmm. Left front pocket." The dip in that throaty voice sent tingles down his spine. Not that Zechs yodeling La Cucaracha wasn't enough to send tingles down his spine, but still. Zechs touched him, to the left of his boner, on the leather, tugging at something.
"Mmm!" His eyes popped open behind the blindfold and he squirmed.
"For-Play personal lubricant." Zechs sounded amused and, and, oooh. Long fingers traced a line of pure fire from his collarbones, down his belly, to hook into the waistband of the leather and tug him forward. "Let's see if you can recruit me into the Moonies, hm?"
Oh hell yeah!
Down in the hotel's dining room, Wufei leaned back into his chair and smirked at Heero. Revenge, oh, such utterly perfect revenge. Not only was that braided idiot properly humiliated, but now he would also have to perform a forfeit of Wufei's choosing. Video was an interesting idea. "I love it when a plan comes together."
The End
(:./muffie/moonie2)
