December 1999

Title: Lost Love
Author: Minky
Revised by: Puck aka Robin Goodfellow^^ (26th December 1999)

Lost Love by Minky

Duo ran all the way home excitedly. He couldn't wait to break the news to Heero as he patted his abdomen protectively. * Well, this is it... * A sense of overpowering joy filled his whole body. There were two things that he would never forget: The death of everyone at the Maxwell Church and the other was meeting Heero Yuy. Now, there was another unforgettable thing to be added--this... He smiled tenderly as he recalled the earlier episode:

(flashback)

"Are you sure about this?" A voice whispered uncertainly, it seemed doubtful of the news given. This was too good and miraculous to be true.

"Yes." Another voice confirmed the given news, allaying the fears of the other person.

"Honto ni?"

"Honto desu."

"Honto, honto, honto, honto, honto, honto ni?"

"Hai."

"Really, reall--"

"Duo! How many time must I repeat myself?" a high shrilly voice cried out with exasperation.

"sou desu ne... " Suddenly, Duo's face blushed and a pretty tinge of red spread across his cheek. It made him all the more radiant, like a budding flower blooming in Spring. He lowered his head and gazed at his tummy lovingly. A new life was waiting to be born and that new life was in him, right there...

"Sally, will he be happy about this too?" Duo whispered softly to himself, suddenly unsure about himself and about Heero's reaction to this news...

"I'm sure he will be happy... no, it should be 'ecstatic' about this... "

Duo's eyes lit up at the reassurances given. Sally Po smiled, noting the light shining in Duo's eyes. / Phew... after all these months of preparation, we've finally succeeded... /

"Honto ni?"

"Yes."

"Honto, honto, honto, honto, honto ni?"

A sigh was given, lined with a dash of vexation, "Duo, must we go through that again?"

Duo grinned sheepishly, too happy for words.

(End of flashback)

"This is too good to be true. Heero will be very surprised. Oh, I can't wait to tell him."

Back in their house, Heero Yuy dropped his duffel bag on the floor and sat down on the bed. He had already packed his belongings. He had to go... had to leave him... He hid his face in his hands, contemplating whether he was making the right choice or not. He didn't want to leave, but he did not have the courage to stay, did not have the confidence to make this final commitment, and did not have the nerve to be with him...

/Should I be doing this? Must I really leave? /

He was unsure about his decision, so he raised his head and looked around the little room he now shared with Duo. How many times had he made love to Duo in this room? All the happy times he had shared with Duo were here, here in this room... he got up and walked towards the wall opposite the king-sized bed that took up the center of the room. He knelt down and traced a faint stain at the bottom of the wall... He smiled fondly as he recalled the time they had made love standing up and slid down while they were at the height of their pleasure. At the time, they had been too poor to own a bed. All they had were two sleeping bags. He recalled how impatient they had been as they tore each other's clothes and how their tongues lashed out together as they explored each other's heated bodies...

/ Oh God... /

He could not stand it any longer; he got up and went back to sit on the bed as he shut out all those haunting memories. Now, he waited for Duo to be back.

Just then, the door burst open and the excited boy ran in.

"Heero! I have news for you. I... " Duo's sentence stopped mid-way when he noticed the duffel bag on the floor and the Japanese boy sitting on the bed in grim silence.

"Er... Heero, what's with the bag? You going somewhere?"

"I'm leaving."

"Huh? You are what?! Where to?!" Duo asked worriedly.

"Relena's."

"What?! Why?!" Duo was shocked that Heero was leaving him for Relena.

"Duo, we can't go on like this." Heero looked at Duo straight in the eye. "There is no future for us. It's better for us to part ways and lead our own lives." Heero ended calmly though he did not felt that calm.

"What do you mean by that? By going to Relena, there will be a future for you?" Duo asked, wide eyed at Heero's logic.

"No... I don't think so."

"Then why do you want to go to her? Why can't you just stay with me?"

Heero too did not understand why he wanted to leave... wanted to go to Relena. He had no idea what there was at Relena's. All he knew was the need to be away, yet strangely, he also wanted so desperately to be with Duo...

"You just don't understand, Duo... " Heero cried out, wanting to convince Duo that he needed to leave... wanting to convince himself that he had to leave. "Commitment is something I can't give you." /Yes... that's it... / Heero thought as he continued his speech.

"With Relena, I am just keeping her company. I don't love her and I don't have to give her any commitment." / Yes!! That was it... I cannot give you this assurance and thus I have to go away... /

Duo began to tremble. He couldn't understand what Heero was trying to say... /I don't want commitment... I just want you, is that hard for you to understand? I just want you... / Duo cried out in his mind. He could not bring himself to say this. The words were all trapped in his throat. As he stared at Heero, he whispered brokenly, "You are... leaving me... because... you are... afraid... to be tied down?"

Heero did not reply to this. No... It was not that... it was because he did not know what to reply.

"I thought you loved me. Please Heero, don't leave me." Duo implored, hoping that Heero would change his mind...

Heero came up to him and pulled Duo close against him, his arms were like bands of steel around Duo's trembling body. He breathed deeply Duo's scent, trying to memorize his aroma.

/ Oh God... I'm going to miss him... / He thought to himself as he opened his mouth to deliver the ultimation.

"It's over, Duo. Good bye." Heero's voice was toneless.

Before he could get a breath to reply, Heero threw Duo away from him. The ex- Wing pilot had to get away from him. Any second longer, he would definitely take the ex-Deathscythe pilot into his arms and plummet into the dark depths of those violet eyes.

Duo fell against the bed and slipped onto the floor. He was too shocked at the way Heero had treated him.

/What have I done?? Haven't we lived together happily for quite some time?? What had I done to displease you?? What??/ He thought numbly as he tried to digest what had happened.

"Heero... please... listen to me." Duo forced the words between his lips, wanting to persuade Heero to stay but he was too late. Heero had left the room, slamming the door behind him.

For a few seconds, Duo stared after him, unable to even cry out, unable to do anything but feeling stunned and bewildered by what had happened.

/ Nani?? What had caused him to react in this manner? What had happened? What had happened?? / Duo stared at the door, unable to react...

Slowly he hugged his knees as the reality of what had just happened began to sink in. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he cried out, "Heero!! You baka baka baka baka!!!" He hid his face between his knees as he continued to sob, "Why didn't you hear me out? ...Why? Why does this have to happen now?"

Suddenly, Duo began to laugh hysterically, "Fate is playing a cruel joke on me."

Duo grabbed the alarm clock from the side table and threw it across the room in anger and it hit the mirror on the wall, shattering the glass.

Ping!! The broken pieces of the mirror scattered around the room. He picked up a shard of glass that landed at his feet and clutched it tightly, cutting his own palm. Pain spread from the wound while blood flowed out. It trickled down his arm and dripped onto the floor. God... he needed the physical pain, it was bliss because it took away the other pain that hurt more deeply. Duo stared at his bloodied hand and began to laugh hysterically again.

"Heero! You'll regret this!! I'll make you pay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Heero stared out of the window of the train, looking at the stars in the sky. He remembered how he used to stargaze with Duo, lying side by side on the grass of open fields. He smiled in rememberance of the first time he had stargazed with Duo...

"Passengers going to the terminal heading Earth, please alight here."

Heero was jolted out of his reverie when the announcement was made. When the doors opened, he alighted there for this was his designated stop. After a few minutes, the doors began to close automatically, and the train began to leave the station for its next destination. Heero stared at the retreating train, watching it become smaller and smaller. It gave him a sense of loss and disorientation. Now, he had to face his future alone... Duo was no longer by his side... Somehow, that made him felt even worse than before.

/Why oh why have I made that decision to leave him? Can someone tell why??!!/

Yes, the perfect soldier was confused. He had realized he had no purpose in life except to carry out missions. He had thought he would lead a normal life again after the war but it was not so... He had felt insecure when the war had ended. He had thought that feeling was temporary and that it would go away after he had settled down someplace with Duo. Instead, the feeling just kept on growing stronger and stronger until it gagged him. Being with Duo did not lessen this feeling, in fact, it only made it stronger. He did not understand why, but he felt controlled by this sense of insecurity. After another few weeks of living with it, he realized he couldn't deal with it. He needed to be alone...

"Duo, I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you. But I had to let you go. I can't commit myself to you. Emotion is something that I don't possess no matter how hard I try." He called out to the retreating train, as if that train he was on earlier had been Duo. After the train had disappeared from his line of vision, he turned away to take the space shuttle to Earth, to Relena.

(On earth, at Relena's estate). A few days later...

Knock knock

Heero sighed dejectedly -- He knew who was at the door. The days he spent at Relena's had not lessened the feelings he was having. He had thought that the feelings of insecurity would vanish when he arrived there, or at the very least, lessen a little but they did not. He opened the door to see Relena Peacecraft smiling at him.

"Heero, you look so handsome." Relena exclaimed. She still could not believe it. Heero had come to her!! After all this time of her chasing Heero and him not responding. Heero had finally made the first move to locate her... What had happened between Duo and him? She had wondered briefly at times but she dismissed it as she observed him. Heero, dressed in a white tuxedo suit looked simply gorgeous.

/ Yes... white complements the blueness of his eyes... / she thought dreamily as she asked politely,

"Are you ready? Most of the guests are here."

Heero nodded and offered his arm to her. Relena linked her arm through his and walked towards the ballroom looking blissful.

Heero looked around the ballroom full of guests and wondered again why he was there. He hated crowds and he didn't feel obliged to entertain them.

"Heero?"

Heero turned at the mention of his name and saw Sally Po standing nearby.

"It's really you. What a surprise to see you here... " Sally Po said in a quiet voice, "Oh, I almost forgot to congratulate you."

Heero gave her a puzzled look. He did not comprehend why she had to congratulate him. / Was it an insult?/

Sally frowned a little, not understanding the expression on Heero's face. "You still don't know? Duo didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Heero looked baffled.

"You are going to be a father! Duo is pregnant, conceiving your child. It seems that the implant we placed in him is reacting to your sperm though the results came so much later than we expected. Duo was feeling nausea and was rather unwell, so he came to me. I ran a test on him and found it positive. He... " Sally paused when she noticed Heero had gone pale.

"Heero, are you all right? Hey, Heero!"

Relena turned in time to see Heero running out of the ballroom.

"Heero!" she chased after him. She did not want to lose him again, not after he had came to her of his own accord.

/Why is he leaving?? Doshite?/

Heero had reached the main door. He saw a car, and immediately pushed the parking valet away to jump into the car. He then started the car, driving away immediately, leaving a trail of smoke and dust behind.

Relena stared after him in astonishment.

"Heero... "

Heero drove the car through the evening heavy traffic impatiently, charging like a mad bull. He just wanted to get back to Duo immediately.

/ But... but will he still be there??/ he shook that nasty thought away, hoping against all hope that Duo would still be there...

/ But he couldn't be there... He would have gone by now... No, I mustn't think such thoughts... He will still be there... He has to be, I will it... Oh what have I done?? Duo... please... Please be there... onegai!!!... /

He felt very angry with himself, angry over what he said to Duo. If only he had let Duo talk...

"Oh Duo, I'm sorry. I am such a fool. Please forgive me." Heero pleaded in his heart.

He slammed at the brakes and ran into the terminal, then purchased a ticket back to L2.

/ Please gods... Please let him still be there... I beg of you, please let him be there... / He beseeched to any gods out there who might be listening...

A few hours later...

"Duo!" he threw the door open.

The room was empty and cold.

/ No... / He then saw the shattered glass and the blood stains on the floor.

/It cannot be... / Heero slumped against the wall, all strength vanished as he stared at the empty room.

"Duo... "

Heero stepped out of the cafeteria and looked up at the night sky. Thunder was roaring and droplets of rain were beginning to fall, splattering on the pavement. Heero pulled the hood of his windbreaker over his head and headed back to the hotel he was currently staying at. He had arrived in this far away colony a day ago, still in search of Duo.

Stopping at the traffic lights, the rain became heavier. Heero clutched his windbreaker hood firmly over his head and bowed his head down to avoid getting wet. He crossed the road when the traffic light turned green. Pedestrians from both sides who were rushing to cross the road quickly to seek shelter from the rain were jostling one another. Heero brushed past a person briefly and he stopped for a moment.

/ Could it be?... /

He thought he saw someone with a long braid of chestnut hair. He turned back quickly to get a better look but that person was already lost in the crowd.

"I must be hallucinating again. Every time I see someone with a braid, I think it's him." Heero heaved a sigh and resumed his journey back to the hotel.

Meanwhile, Duo who was struggling with his umbrella and his groceries was muttering a curse under his breath at the person who had brushed past him abruptly at the crossroad, nearly upsetting his bag of groceries.

"Damn! This rain really comes at the wrong time. I've got to get home fast. I'm all drenched."

Heero slammed his laptop down in frustration. Again his search had ended in futility. Heero had tried every means of tracing Duo's possible whereabouts but all came up to a negative result. Heero had hacked into hospital medical records, banking account systems and even immigration records but there was absolutely nothing on Duo. In a moment of despair, he even tried the death registry and was relieved when the search came up as negative as well.

It had been five years since that fateful day, five years since Duo left him and disappeared. Heero had never given up searching for him. His search took him to various colonies but he had always ended up meeting with disappointment.

The anguish and agony he was feeling during these years were tearing his heart and mind apart. The only thing that kept him sane was an old battered photo of Duo and himself taken during one of their school infiltrations as students. There were moments when he missed Duo so much that he just wanted to pick Duo from his dreams and hug him for real.

Clutching the photo possessively, Heero got up from the chair.

"I need some fresh air."

After raining the whole night, the morning air was refreshing and the weather was cooling. Walking aimlessly around the park, Heero found an empty bench and sat down to rest his feet. He looked across the park at some children playing in the playground.

Looking at the children, Heero couldn't help but wondered what his child was like, wondering if Duo had kept the baby or if he had aborted it. Pangs of guilt shot through his heart when he thought of how an innocent life could have been destroyed because of his moment of foolishness.

"Excuse me, sir." a voice broke his train of thoughts.

Heero turned and saw a little boy standing nearby. He got a rude shock when his eyes fell on this boy. The boy's deep violet eyes and honey brown hair reminded him so much of Duo... / Could this be? No... It cannot be... But he looks so much like... No I must stop assuming that every boy that happens to have his features is our son... But he resembles so much... no... /

"Sir, can I please have my ball back?" the boy interrupted those wild thoughts running rampant in Heero's mind as he pointed to a ball caught in between the legs of the bench.

Heero grabbed the ball from under the bench and handed it to the boy.

"Thank you!" the boy squeaked happily.

"What is your name, little one?"

"My name is Darrell and I am four years old." the boy said proudly, showing Heero his four little fingers to indicate his age. Heero couldn't help but smile.

/ Could our child be this adorable??... /

"Are you here alone?" Heero asked, ruffling the boy's soft hair. He loved the way the boy's hair felt... soft and luxurious... It reminded him of Duo's...

"No, I came with Auntie Hilde."

"Darrell!"

The boy whirled around immediately and waved excitedly as a young woman came running towards them.

"Darrell, I thought I told you not to run around?" the woman reprimanded the boy as she embraced the little creature fiercely, relieved to find him safe and sound.

"You shouldn't be running around like... Oh God... you almost frightened me to death... Oh God!! You are so... "

"I was just running after my ball, Auntie Hilde." The impish boy replied cheerfully.

"Oh you rascal!! Wait till your papa comes... and then... "

Heero stared at the woman and found her strangely familiar.

/ Who is she?? Where have I met her?/

Feeling the weight of a gaze on her, the woman looked up and found a pair of cobalt blue eyes watching her intensely.

"Hilde. Hilde Schbeiker." the name finally came to Heero's mind.

"Heero Yuy?!" the woman gasped as recognition sank in. "Why are you--"

"Darrell! Hilde! Where are you guys?" a voice interrupted what Hilde had wanted to say to Heero.

/That voice!/

Heero's every sense became alert. He got up immediately and focused his attention on the approaching figure. He began to tremble, slightly, as that figure came nearer and nearer... That face which he missed kissing, that braid which he missed fondling . His Duo... His lost love.

" Darrell, You little imp!! Wait till I get my hands on ya and I'll-" Duo stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes came upon the stranger standing by his son.

"Heero."

Hilde took Darrell back to the playground, leaving Heero and Duo alone. Both of them were only a few feet away from each other but the gap between them was like a thousand miles. This unexpected meeting had somehow left Heero speechless. He had so much to tell Duo, he had conjured up many scenes of how he should approach Duo, how he could make Duo forgive him... But now, with Duo standing right in front of him, he had suddenly become tongue-tied.

The silence between them was death-like, almost unbearable... He wished that Duo could say something... Heero tried to look into Duo's violet eyes that captivated him so much but Duo refused to look at him, instead opting to stare out at the playground, at his son. Heero studied Duo quietly. He still looked very much the same but there were some subtle, visible changes. He was thinner now, though he still looked so beautiful. However, his radiant smile, the cheeky grins and the sparkle in his eyes were missing. Heero felt a keen urge to hug Duo, to kiss the stony anger away and restore those captivating smiles with his touch...

"How have you been all these years?" Heero broke the silence.

"Fine, still very much alive and kicking." Duo's voice was dripping with sarcasm.

Heero tried to ignore the disdain in his estranged lover's voice.

"Duo, is that...is that our son? He is such a lively boy." Heero asked hesitantly, looking at the cheerful little boy running around the playground.

Duo turned to Heero with anger flashing menacingly in his eyes.

"What do you want, Heero?!" He cried out bitterly at Heero, "If it's about Darrell, you better get this straight. Darrell is my son."

"Duo, I'm not trying to take Darrell away from you. I missed you. I have been searching everywhere for you all these years."

"What for? You chose to walk out on me five years ago. Why should you be looking for me?" Duo snapped.

"I am truly sorry for what happened back then. I was wrong, I was such a fool to leave you. I understand that no amount of apology can atone for what I have done to you, for hurting your feelings. But I just want a chance to make it up to you... and Darrell."

Duo gave a bitter laugh.

"Make it up to me and Darrell? What makes you think that I need you to do that now? Where were you when I needed you most? Where were you when Darrell took his first step? Where were you when he spoke his first word?" Duo challenged, feeling the long suppressed anger rising in him.

Heero remained silent. Duo had every right to be angry with him, to hate him, to scream and yell at him. After all, he had let him down.

Duo took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down.

"Forget it, Heero. I didn't need you five years ago and I definitely don't need you now. Just stay away from our lives." He ended with finality ringing in his voice. "Darrell! Come on, let's go home." Duo called out to his son.

Darrell came running into his father's arms. Duo picked the boy up and walked away. Darrell peeked from Duo's shoulder and gave Heero and Hilde a little wave.

"Papa, who is he?" Darrell was heard asking.

Hilde watched Heero doubtfully. She was still stunned by his sudden re-appearance. She looked Heero over, and noticed the faint fatigue lines running across his forehead, saw the tiredness in his eyes. She knew instinctively that Heero was having a hard time too...

"You can't really blame Duo for being so contemptuous. He went through a lot of hardship over the years." Hilde said gently, breaking the silence between them.

Heero turned his attention to the young woman.

"Can you tell me what happened to him these years?"

Hilde walked to the empty bench and sat down and Heero followed suit.

"You really want to know how he lived these years? Well, after you left him, he became directionless." She halted, frowning at Heero. But she continued, "He was totally lost. He didn't know what to do and he was pregnant with a child. He harbored thoughts of aborting the child and committing suicide. Luckily he came to his senses. He began to lead a wandering life, going from one colony to another until he was so near his full term of pregnancy that he had to find a place to settle down. That's how he came to be here. All this while, Duo was suffering from severe depression. I guess he has never gotten over the fact that you left him for Relena." She ended with a resigned tone. She took a deep breath, studying the surroundings. Heero just waited patiently beside her.

"Duo was overjoyed when Darrell was born. You should have seen his expression... " She added, chuckling softly. She turned to Heero and looked straight into his blue cobalt eyes, "Darrell is his pride and joy. He worked very hard to provide the best for Darrell. But Duo was still very much a child himself. It was very stressful for him to have to juggle between his job and taking care of a small baby. There were times when he just broke down emotionally."

Heero listened to Hilde's account of Duo's life in grim silence. Leaning his head against the back of the bench, Heero closed his eyes as regret and shame flooded through him. The fact that he had wounded Duo in countless ways made him wince... His heart tore when he realized Duo had endured so much suffering... He blamed himself for all of Duo's misery and agony.

Hilde knew how hurt Heero was feeling right then, and consoled him, "But not all is gone now... He... he still loves you... "

Heero's eyes snapped open and he fixed his eyes on Hilde, "Honto ni? But... but... " Heero stopped, his face suddenly wiped clean of expression as he continued, "All these years, I have never stopped searching for him... I know he is very good at hiding but this time, he was too good. He has outdone me."

Hilde gave a small laugh.

"He is known as 'Max' over here. I believe he changed his name on purpose, to hide his identity as an ex-gundam pilot. But mostly it was to hide himself from you."

"I see... ." Heero whispered, reflecting on Hilde's words... He knew that Hilde had always carried a torch for Duo. Suddenly, he wanted to know something about them...

Are you two..."

"Are we married? No. I met Duo by chance two years ago when I came to this colony to take up a teaching post. I offered to take care of Darrell for him."

"You still love Duo, don't you?" Heero asked in a matter of fact tone.

Hilde's head snapped up in surprise at that question,her face beginning to flush a little.

"Yes, I still love him. But we can never be together like that. I'm not the one..." Hilde looked at Heero sadly.

"It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return... I may have been with him all this while but... " she broke off as she turned her face away from Heero. "However, what is more painful is to love someone but never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. You love him, Heero. Let him know." Hilde encouraged quietly.

"What should I do? Duo doesn't seem likely to forgive me." Heero cried out in anguish, unwittingly allowing despair to creep into his voice. He recalled Duo's earlier reaction towards him, the blatant contempt and intense hatred displayed in his large lilac eyes.

"You will have to talk to him. Try to convince him with your sincerity. Never say goodbye if you still want to try. Give Duo some time to sort out his feelings. Both of you have wasted five years. All this unnecessary suffering should end."

Heero looked at Hilde curiously. This young woman who used to fight with him for Duo's affections was now trying to help them make up. She had really matured.

"Thank you for your advice, Hilde. I will try to talk to him again." Heero gave her a sincere smile.

"Please do. I want Duo to be happy again."

The phone was ringing in the hall. Duo put down his papers and went to answer it.

"Hello?" Silence.

"Hello?" After a moment "Duo, it's me."

Duo frowned and was about to slam down the phone when Heero spoke again.

"Duo, I would like to talk to you."

"We have nothing to talk about." Duo replied scornfully, his voice dripping with disdain.

Silence at the other end.

"I know, I have let you down... I've tried to fool myself... I thought that I could live with no one else... But I was wrong... I need you... Please listen to me, just this once... "

Still, no answer from the other end. Heero was getting desperate. The words just keep tumbling out from his mouth as he tried to convince Duo to give him a second chance. "Duo, if you think you can forgive me and accept me into your life again, please come and meet me tonight at eight at the pier."

"And if I don't?" Duo asked spitefully. At long last, Duo opened his mouth. A long pause.

"If you don't, I... I shall never bother you again. Duo, please come." The line went dead.

Duo stared at the phone in silence.

"Who is that?" Hilde asked, coming out of the kitchen.

"Heero. He wants to meet me at the pier tonight."

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"You know what I mean, Duo. Are you going or what? What are you going to do now that Heero is back?"

"Nothing."

Hilde was exasperated. "What do you mean nothing? Aren't you going to tell Darrell who he is?"

"I don't think that is necessary. Darrell is my son."

"He is Heero's too. Duo, it has been five years. Aren't you going to forgive him and accept him again?"

"Why should I?!" Duo lashed out angrily, "All these years, he was never by my side, never there when I needed him most, never there when I was mired in desolation and pain... Where has he been?!! At Relena's side!!! He is the one who done me wrong." Duo retorted irately, consumed by jealousy and resentment. "Besides, I don't love him anymore."

"Duo, never say you don't love a person anymore if you can't let go. I know you still love him. I know you have been feeling very miserable these years. But you can't continue to dwell on the past. The brightest future will always be based on forgotting the past. You can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches."

"Hilde, please don't try to start this with me. I don't wish to talk about him anymore. Just let it rest." Duo insisted stubbornly.

Hilde felt too tired to argue with him.

"Fine. But I am telling you, if you let him go this time, you will never see him again."

The old grandfather clock rang again. Seven-thirty. Duo was still deliberating if he should go and meet Heero. Though he had stubbornly denied it, he actually missed Heero very badly. He wanted very badly for Heero to come back to him again but his pride was stopping him from reaching out to Heero. Duo was having mixed feelings.

"You are such a stubborn idiot, Duo Maxwell!" He remembered Hilde scolding. "Don't let your pride rule your heart."

"Perhaps I should just go and listen to what he has to say." Duo decided.

A scream and a loud crash came from the kitchen, startling Duo. Rushing into the kitchen, he saw Darrell unconscious on the floor with an overturned stool and a broken cookie jar beside him. Blood was oozing out of the gash on the side of his head.

"Darrell!"

"Duo!"

Duo looked up as Hilde reached his side.

"I rushed here as soon as I received your message. How is Darrell?" Hilde was panting slightly.

Duo shook his head in distress. "I don't know. He is still inside. Oh God... "

Hilde grasped Duo's trembling hands and held them tightly, silently offering him her comfort.

A doctor came out of the emergency room. Duo and Hilde went up to him immediately.

"Doctor, how is my son?"

"Don't worry, your son is all right now. He has a few stitches on the head and a slight concussion. Other than that, he is fine." the doctor assured him.

Duo let out his breath. "Thank God."

Duo and Hilde followed as the nurses pushed Darrell to his ward.

Sitting on the hospital bed, Duo looked sadly at his injured son.

"Duo!" Hilde suddenly exclaimed. "Aren't you supposed to meet Heero tonight?"

Duo blinked at her for a moment. In the midst of panic and worry, Duo had completely forgotten about the meeting with Heero.

"Oh shit." Duo glanced at his watch. It was already eleven.

"Duo, go see him now." Hilde urged.

"But Darrell... "

"Don't worry, I will look after him. Go now."

Duo gave her a tired smile. "Thanks Hilde."

Heero gulped the last drop of the beer down his throat, his eighth can for the night. He had been standing near the waterfront for the past three hours, waiting for Duo to turn up. Pairs and pairs of lovers who were at the waterfront, whispering words of love to each other, were all gone, leaving Heero to wait stonily alone for his love.

Heero crushed the can in his hand. "Duo, do you really hate me so much that you can't even give me another chance?" No, he simply could not believe that his Duo would treated him in this manner... But his Duo had not arrived yet...

Heero hurled the crushed can into the sea, watching it hit the surface of the sea with a loud splash. He thought back to what Hilde had said to him ' He still loves you... '

/Blah!! What a load of rubbish!! How can he still love me???/ He thought angrily to himself. / How could he still love me? ...after all that I have done... / He straightened his back, and with one last searching look for his Duo but to no avail, he left the pier dejectedly.

Moments later, Duo arrived at the pier, looking around for Heero but there wasn't a soul in sight.

"Heero. Heero! Why didn't you wait for me?!" Duo shouted out to the open sea, tears of anger and disappointment stinging his eyes.

Duo walked into Darrell's ward, physically and emotionally weary.

"Duo, where is Heero?" Hilde was surprised to see Duo come back alone.

"How is Darrell?"

"He is not awake yet. The doctor just came to check up on him. Duo, where is Heero?" Hilde asked again.

"I didn't see him."

"Huh? You mean he had left? Oh Duo."

Duo sighed sadly. "Forget it, Hilde. Heero and I are not meant to be together. Fate is just making a sport out of us."

Hilde was at a loss for words, not knowing how to comfort Duo.

At the airport, an announcement was heard. "Passengers of flight RZ-259, please proceed to departure hall 3 for boarding. The flight will take off in ten minutes."

Glancing up, Heero saw his flight number on the information screen with the words 'Last Call' flashing beside it.

Picking up his bag from the floor reluctantly, Heero made his way to the departure hall. Stopping for a while, Heero looked back, hoping for someone to turn up, to stop him from leaving. Seeing no one, Heero proceeded to the departure hall with a resigned look.

Duo caressed his sleeping son's face gently, looking very despondent. The thought of Heero gone forever was traumatizing him... no... the thought of Heero not being with him haunted him... He could not believe what he had done -- he had let Heero go again without even trying to stop him...

"Son, I'm sorry that you didn't have the chance to get to know your daddy. My stupid stubbornness has chased your daddy away. Now we will probably never see him again." Duo whispered, tears forming at the corners of his eyes.

Duo lowered his head onto his arms and sobbed uncontrollably.

"Heero, I'm sorry. Please come back to me. Don't leave me alone here. I can't take all this by myself." He whispered brokenly, hoping that perhaps, somehow Heero could heard this cry... this plea...

"You won't be alone anymore, Duo. I will be here for you."

Startled, Duo jerked his head up and his eyes widened in surprise. Standing quietly at the doorway was Heero.

"He... Heero!" Duo exclaimed, rushing forward.

Heero discarded his bag onto the floor to catch Duo who flung himself into his arms, hugging him tightly.

"I thought you were gone, gone for good." Tears were staining Heero's shirt.

"I was going to leave but something kept holding me back, telling me to come back to you. Then I realized it was my heart. My heart has always been with you, no matter where I was or where I went. You are the keeper of my heart, Duo. So I turned back and went to your place. I met Hilde and she told me what happened. I'm sorry that you had to face these all by yourself." Heero said in a gentle tone, trying to soothe his sobbing lover.

"I'm sorry too, Heero. I have been such an idiot."

Heero tilted Duo's chin up and looked into his eyes.

"From now on, there will be no more 'sorry' between us. I will be here with you always. We will face whatever problems or difficulties together. You will never be alone again, I promise."

"Heero... " Heero lowered his lips to Duo's and kissed him tenderly, their first kiss in five years.

"Papa... "

They pulled away and turned to see Darrell had woken up.

"Yes Darrell, Papa is here." Duo said, going over to his side.

Darrell looked at Heero for a while and smiled in recognition.

"Hello sir." the boy greeted.

"Hello Darrell."

Duo pushed Heero towards the bed and said, "Darrell, this is your Daddy... "

Hilde closed the door softly, smiling at their happy reunion. "You have finally found your happiness, Duo. Cherish it always, don't ever let it go again."

Heero and Duo smiled as Darrell waved to them excitedly from the merry-go-round.

"He is such an active boy." Heero observed.

Duo laughed. "He is just like me, can never sit still."

Heero smiled at that remark.

"Duo?"

"Hmm?" Duo was sipping at his drink.

"You know, I think I like kids very much. Now that we have Darrell, do you think you want to try for a girl?"

Duo nearly choked on his drink.

The End

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