14-Nov-1999
last part of the Dorothy-Heero-Relena story
It's a lie, it's a lie, it's a lie, thought Relena. How can he choose her over me? I'm so much more beautiful. She held her breath, trying to stop herself from hyperventilating. Violent thoughts about what she wanted to do to Dorothy filled her skull. She imagined chasing Dorothy down the hall with a chainsaw, shoving her down the stairs and acts so hideous that they could not be told to the innocent reader. Relena then kneaded her temples. No, no, no violence. Absolute pacifism, absolute pacifism. She opened the door and said, "Dorothy!"
Dorothy looked up to see Relena standing at the door of the fencing room. "Yes, Relena-sama." Hmmm, judging from her pale color of her face, the way her jaw muscles are working and her clenched fists, she must've heard from her circle of friends that I mentioned in passing the fact that Heero and I are an item. Oh, my, this is such fun, she thought.
"Is it true?"
"Is what true, Relena-sama?"
"That you are in love with my Heero."
Dorothy mockingly gasped. "He's yours? He didn't say anything of the sort to me. I'm shocked, I'm absolutely shocked."
Relena walked over to her and said, "Yes, he's mine. I'm in love with him and I'd like it if you were to stop spreading lies about you being his sweetheart."
"Let's ask him, shall we?" said Dorothy. She smiled and turned to the door of the boy's changing room.
As Heero walked out, Dorothy said, "My dear Heero, are we not an item?"
"Yes."
"Now let's go and study together."
Heero grunted and followed Dorothy out of the door. The vein in Relena's right temple began to pulse to a frightening beat and the temperature of the room rose as steam issued from her ears. Her vision was starting to taken a most peculiar crimson shade. She thought, I must talk with Quatre.
Meanwhile, Heero turned to Dorothy and said, "Do you think she believes it?"
"Oh, undoubtedly."
"Quatre," said Relena.
"Yes, Relena," said Quatre, as he was looking at the sheet music for "The Sunlit Garden" while sitting at the piano.
"What does Heero think of me?"
"Think?" said Quatre. He put down his sheet music and looked at Relena standing over him. He began to sweatdrop from the serious, furious look on her face.
"Yes. And when did Heero and Dorothy become a couple?"
"Couple?" squeaked Quatre, whose head then promptly hit the keys of the piano.
Relena promptly shook him awake. "Quatre, I'm asking you a question. Please pay attention."
"What was the question again?"
"What does Heero think about me?"
"Well, I guess he's fond of you but he's... " Quatre then paused. Oh, I knoooooow she doesn't want to hear about Heero and Duo.
"I see he's involved with Dorothy."
Quatre facevaulted. "Dorothy? When did this happen?"
Relena ignored him. "Quatre, you know how much I like, no, love Heero. I was wondering if you could help me win him over away from Dorothy."
"And how could I do that?" said Quatre, concentrating very hard to keep control of his bladder.
"How about I set you up with Dorothy on a blind date?"
Quatre filled his lungs and let out a scream louder than a sonic boom. Meanwhile, several miles away, Trowa suddenly opened his eyes in his bed at the circus and gasped, "Someone is calling out to me!!!!"
"Heero, is it true?" said Quatre as they both ate lunch.
"Is what true?"
"That you and Dorothy... "
Heero looked irritated and said, "I'm just trying to get Relena to stop bothering me. So far, she hasn't bothered me recently. Now I have to wonder what she's got planned. Why? Did you want to date Dorothy?"
Quatre nearly choked on his food.
"How flattering to be wanted by two Gundam pilots, not just one," said Dorothy as she sat at their table. Her smile was a bit more ironic than usual.
"That's enough, Dorothy."
"You're getting off lightly, Heero Yuy. Some girls would insist on seeing us kiss before they'd believe it."
Heero glared at her. Dorothy smiled back. "Do not worry, Relena seems to have... "
"Heero, I need to talk to you," said Relena. "Alone."
Dorothy mentally rubbed her hands with glee.
Heero said, "I'm sorry, but right now I'm with Dorothy, my... " He paused, knowing he was going to regret this. "Koibito."
Quatre pushed his food away from him. Relena shook with fury. "K-Koibito? You've never said anything like that to me."
"Well, Relena-sama, you should hear what he says when he... " said Dorothy.
"Dorothy Catalonia!"
"Yes, Relena-sama."
"I challenge you to a duel! The winner gets Heeeeero."
"I choose fencing as the method of dueling as is my right as the person being challenged."
Heero began to seethe. "Omae o... "
"Yes, yes," said Relena, waving his words away. She then turned to Dorothy and said in her most imperious manner, "Tomorrow at noon, you and I will go to the fencing room to do combat. Arrive promptly." With that, she stormed off.
Quatre turned to Dorothy and said, "You're enjoying every minute of this, aren't you?"
"Immensely."
The usually empty fencing room was filled with Relena's fan club, a few Dorothy supporters, Quatre and some of his friends, and guys who just enjoyed watching two girls fighting. Heero was there, but he had turned on his computer.
Relena and Dorothy came out of the changing room, both dressed in fencing uniforms. Both walked to the center of the fencing room and faced each other.
"Go, Relena-sama," said one of the girls in the audience.
Dorothy's supporters were quiet as they believed cheering was inelegant. Quatre and his friends sweatdropped.
The guys who enjoyed two girls fighting hooted. Heero just watched the screensaver he'd made that showed various pictures of Duo in several seductive poses, wearing or not wearing...
Both girls put on their masks and got into position. They circled each other. Surprisingly, the fight lasted longer than three strokes. But as Relena was Relena...
Her fencing foil flew threw the air towards the audience. The girls tried to scatter as much as they could. The foil ended up bouncing off the wall, flying through the air and landing at Heero's feet. Heero kept watching the screensaver.
"Why? Why didn't I win?" wailed Relena.
"Oh, Relena-sama, you've been watching too much Utena."
2 ½ weeks later
Dorothy closed her textbook and sighed.
Heero said, "What is wrong?"
"Relena's been challenging me every three days in order to win you back. I'm so tired of fighting her. I'm thinking of losing on purpose, no matter how inelegant that is."
"Sorry to have inconvenienced you." And he was genuinely sorry. With Relena bothering Dorothy instead, he managed to get a lot of work done.
"No, it was really quite amusing, but I think I'll have to let Relena pursue you again."
"Dorothy."
"Yes, Heero."
Heero frowned. "You are a very strange girl."
Dorothy laughed. "No doubt about it."
The End
(:./mk/tease2)
