27 August 2000
Thank you Hervé-san for the help getting the lyrics... Here is a fic!
Category: Angst, a little sap
Rating: G
Pairings: 2+1/1+2
Warnings: Depressing... angsty...
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: I own nothing... Song credit to Wynonna Judd... G-boy's to their
owners.
Feedback: Please.
NOTES: I think it sucks, cause I didn't follow the story of the lyrics, but
I wanted it to be kinda happy... I was told that that would help keep my
depression at bay... so I try for happy... ^_^
[1] This is a terribly incorrect following of the lyrics, so hence probably not as good as some of my other stuff... so sue me! Not really, please...
[2] This is a very old song... I don't listen to country anymore, so the
fact that I know and love this song is proof of the song's age... Ack! and mine... well, sorta.. On with the fic...
[Tell me when I can open my eyes
I don't want to watch you walk out that door
There's no easy way to get through goodbye
I'd probably try and talk you into staying once more]
He's leaving. It hurts to watch and know that that is his choice. I-- my heart is breaking thinking I might never see him again...
I sit on the couch that Quatre has in the living room. I can't watch him leave. He's going on a mission... I might never see him again...
The worst part is I haven't told him how I feel about him... that I love him... that he means life to me... That I'd rather die, than live without him.
Oh God does it hurt to know he's leaving... I want to run to him and ask him to stay... to not leave to take that guard mission for Relena... but... but I know he has to... so I sit here... pretending that I don't care...
[Or I'd lie and say it's all for the best
Wish you luck and say I have no regrets
But I'm not up to being strong
So I'll wait until you're gone
Is it over yet, is it over yet?]
I pretend so I don't have to face him and be strong... I couldn't even get my voice to work... I would break and beg him to stay I know it... I know too that he doesn't love me, but oh god do I love him...
Yeah, all I am to him is a body to seek release from, but.. but he is something more to me... he is my life... I don't know when I let myself get that attached to him, but I did and that is that.
'It's all for the best...'
'Nope, no regrets...'
The phrases ring hollowly in my mind as I think of what I'd have to say if I did walk him out...
'I love you... please stay...' one phrase begged.
/No! No, I can't! It's a mission... the mission is the most important thing right now! ... right?/ I scream at myself.
Is he gone? Is it over... can I run to my room and cry?
[A taxi's waiting in the driveway for you
You call my name, I guess your ready to leave
I'd like to help you with a suitcase or two
But I'm afraid I'm gonna wind up down on my knees]
Trowa honks the horn, drawing him out and to the vehicle... I guess Quatre's gonna be alone for a while too... demo, he knows Tro loves him... that's the difference, ne? Do you love me, Heero?
He stops at the living room door. I look up... I can't avoid it... his eyes lock with mine... I stammer out a 'good luck' then force my gaze down. He snorts. I want to watch him leave... but I feel weak... my heart can't take it... I don't want his leaving view of me to be of weakness... for I know if I try to help I'll wind up on the sidewalk bawling my eyes out...
'I love you... please stay...' my mind pleads, but I never let the thought get to my mouth... it gets me in enough trouble as it is.
[I should tell you that I want you to go
I really need to spend some time on my own
Smile and say goodbye
So you don't see me dying inside
Is it over yet, is it over yet?]
I smile at him as he glares icily at me, turning to leave...
"G-good-bye, Heero..." I say still smiling... that sounded pathetic... even to me... I smile broader to hide the dying light in my eyes...
He nods and lifts his carasack... then turns to me... Why? I don't know, but he did... "Good-bye, Duo..."
With that he turns to leave...
"Heero!" I cry.
[I should lie and say it's all for the best
Wish you luck and say I have no regrets
But I'm not up to being strong
So I'll wait until your gone
Is it over yet, is it over yet?]
He turns to me again...
I know I shouldn't do it... I know I should just let him go... just let him leave... but... but I can't... I can't be that strong... no...
"I love you..." I whisper, barely audible. "Please don't leave me..." I say as tears begin to stream down my cheeks.
I look at the floor, not wanting to see the disgust that I know is written all over his face.
I hear the thunk of a bag, then light foot steps coming towards me... Then strong arms are wrapped around me and I feel a thrumming heartbeat against my cheek.
"I love you too, Duo..." he whispers into my hair.
He loves me!! HE LOVES ME!!!!!!!!! I wrap my arms around him and sob helplessly. He really loves me... but then I sober... "But you still have to leave..."
He shakes his head... "Quatre can go... I'm sure Trowa would enjoy that..." he smirks against my ear...
Is it over yet?
Yes, he isn't leaving... yes, he loves me... it's over... he'll stay with me... I know I shouldn't have done it... but I did... and I am glad... cause I couldn't have lived without him...
-finis-
(:./willow/isover)
