01-Jun-2001
<delurks, dragging herself by the scruff of the neck>
Hi guys. ^_^; This trippy little fic is dedicated to Pixy Misa, the 100,000th visitor to my page at GWAddiction... she requested, and I tried to fulfill. I think I may have failed...
Title: Always Found Wanting
Author: Em
Category: Drama...?
Warnings/Labels: Trippy. Angsty. Weird. Not my usual voice(s)
Feedback: Please, please, please, send me feedback offlist--I barely have time
to sleep these days, let alone check the archives...
I am rarely proud of the things I did during the wars. They were things that needed to be done in order that Operation Meteor--both versions of it--might be accomplished, but they were things I did because they were needful, not because I wanted to do them.
--that's not true--
My service to Mariemeia...
--was a mistake--
...was a miscalculation.
--you were shortsighted--
I thought that hers was the only way for a warrior to survive.
--you were blind--
I was...
--foolish--
...disoriented during the days that followed the destruction of the Libra. I was young, and turned to what I thought was a new mission to busy myself.
--you were stupid--
Maybe it was a mistake. But it was a mistake I corrected.
--nearly at the cost of someone's life--
Yuy was the strongest of us all. I had confidence in him.
--you were faithless. in everything. to everyone--
I would not have challenged him if some part of me hadn't known he would stop me.
--you were arrogant--
He understood. He stopped me. He saved the world. He always does.
--you were jealous--
No! I have no need of jealousy. I am stronger than that.
--you're weak--
I was trying to do the best I could.
--you failed--
I...
--failed--
never was what you wanted me to be, Meiran.
~owari~
Um... please? Send me feedback? Please?
(:./lys/wanting)
