22-Apr-2002
Title: Dear Heero
Author: Itsupikiookami (aka Siberian Tiger, aka jon)
Archive: GW Addiction and http://www.geocities.com/siberiant_o/
Notes: Don't know what came over me, ya'know, not having written *anything* except weblogs for the past six months... Maybe it's the music I'm listening to, maybe it's 'cause Koi isn't here to hold me and tell me he loves me...
Warnings: None, angst? Oh, and not beta'd.
Disclaimer: Heero, Duo and Quatre all belong to somebody else. A large corporation who doesn't use them at all the way they should... Namely boinking each other... ^_^
Dear Heero,
I have a lot that I want to say to you, I mean, in person, but I can't work up the nerve to get the words out. Do you remember the first time we saw each other? When I thought you were going to kill Relena and I shot you? Several times? And then later I rescued you from that "hospital"?
Well, you grew on me. A lot. Wherever you went, I followed. Checking into the same schools, sharing dorm rooms, even following you (fortunately without your knowledge... I bet if you'd known then you wouldn't have hesitated to kill me!). I helped show you how to be more "normal" and less stoic. To have friends. To enjoy the little things in life that most people pass over without a second thought.
Then the war was over. We had won. All our hard work and suffering had finally paid off. We lived in the same apartment building for a while. Then you left suddenly (probably had nothing to do with the fact that I told you I was gay, right?). By the time I found you, another war was brewing. And once again, we teamed up to crush it and restore peace and freedom.
And just as before, you disappeared without a trace.
Quatre helped me track you down this time, found out where you were living and what you were doing. So I sent you an e-mail... I hope I'm being weird or anything, at least not any weirder than usual...
Anyways, that e-mail asking you to come meet "a familiar place" by the docks is from me, though by now I think you would've guessed that, what with your phenomenal computer skills and all... Yeah, so, I wanted to see you again. To get everything that's been building up inside me out in the open.
You see, Heero, the more we talked, the more we stayed together, the closer we (or at least so I thought) we became. And by the time I realized that I had become attracted to you, my pitiful sense of timing made me "come out" to you. And you just being gone so suddenly made me feel a great sense of loss.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I realized I love you.
There, said it.
What I want most is for you to love me back, but I know that will never happen, and I would've gladly settled for your friendship, but it seems even that is beyond my reach.
Ai,
Duo Maxwell
Heero folded the piece of paper and replaced it in the red envelope he had found on the table. He sat down abrubtly, as if his legs had given out. He looked out to the sea and watched the sun disappear over the horizon.
"I love you, too."
-= owari =-
