April 2001
It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
Zechs sits frowning on the roof of his double-wide trailer, watching the flood-waters rise higher.
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
"Hey, Zechs. Ya'll alright over there?" A woman with garishly bright red hair waved from the roof of the next trailer over. Her Elvis tee-shirt did little to contain her enormous bosom. Near the side of the trailer roof a pack of small children were trying to see who could push the other off into the flood first.
"Just fine, Annabel!" Zechs called back.
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.
"Soon as this goes down ya'll can come over for some Chef Boyarde! My mama says she can keep the kids! Gotta show ya my new girdle!"
I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea:
"Ya kids stop that now! I knew I should have listened to mama. Don't go having yourself any young un's before 9th grade!"
But we loved with a love that was more than love--
I and my Annabel Lee;
"Ya'll look cute up there in them wet shorts, Zechs! Gotta run um through my Maytag when we get a chance though!"
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.
"Is your husband still in jail?" Zechs called out, picturing the large, hulking man with the winged viper tattooed on his arm.
"Yep. He went and punched him out a guard and they done turned down his parole again." Annabel replied.
And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
"Hope this water stops soon. I sure don't wanna miss Survivor tonight. That Colby feller can pop my RC anyday." Annabel glared down at the flood.
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
"I knew I shoulda brought my jacket up here. Hey, Zechy, ya'll swim over here and keep me warm, okay?"
So that her high-born kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
A boat rowed up to the front of the trailor. A small figure in a yellow pancho stood up and called out "Annabel, this is Mama. Ya'll get the kids and come on down here. We're gonna spend the night with yer Aunt Edith."
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.
"But Annabel! What about Survivor?" Zechs called out frantically.
The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went on envying her and me-
"Oh, sugarbutt, we'll do that next week. But Aunt Edith has one of them satellite dishes!"
Yes!--that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
"STUPID WATER!" It almost reached the windows now.
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.
"Bye Zechs. God, I need ta get dry soon. I swear this'll be the death of me if these kids aren't. Jebidiah, I done told you yer sister's head don't come off. Leave it be or I'll whup you."
But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
"Oh sure, blow me off for cable." Zechs pouted. "I hope your boat sinks, you old bag." He called out to Annabel's mother but she didn't hear.
Of many far wiser than we--
And neither the angels in heaven above,
It began to hail.
Nor the demons down under the sea,
A pitbull swam by, trying desperately to reach Zechs, teeth bared.
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.
Zechs laid back on the tin roof with a sigh, picturing those large, lumpy thighs wrapped around him.
For the moon never beams, without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
"Yes, Annabel, it's your turn to wear the Spam pants." Zechs moaned in his sleep.
And the stars never rise, but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
Zechs made a motion of sharing a cigarette with someone.
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling--my darling--my life and my bride,
Surprisingly, the phone and electricity were still working in Zechs' trailer. The answering machine beeped on. "This is Cobra. I swear if yer screwing around with my wife again you longhaired little freak I'm gonna rip you balls off and feed them to ya!"
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.
The waters continued to rise and Zechs awoke to see Annabel's trailer quietly floating away.
The End
(:./lasha/anabel)
