12-Jul-2001
Title: Looney
Author: Tiercel
Warnings: It's a little... strange.
Pairing: 1+2
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, not makin' $ off 'em, don't sue me.
Oh dear... again with the shampoo!
[Curtain rises on a large set that gives the impression of jagged, bare mountains and rock formations in the background. Heero is standing in front of a hole in the meadow in the foreground. He is dressed in ill-fitting armor with a horned helmet. He is carrying a spear and looking decidedly disgruntled.]
Heero: Do I have to do this?
Tiercel: It's not my fault...
Heero: *glare* You can't keep using that shampoo excuse forever, you know.
Tiercel: *eep*
Duo's voice from somewhere offstage: Let's just get this over with!
Tiercel: Right. Act One, Scene Two! Put some feeling into it, boys!
[Heero lifts the spear over his head and begins jabbing it down into the hole]
Heero: [singing] Yo-o-toh-ho; yo-o-toh-ho!
[Another hole lies nearby. Duo emerges, dressed in a gray sweatsuit with a white ball of cotton sewn lopsidely over his butt. Large fake bunny ears are perched on his head. He is chewing on a carrot.]
Duo: [singing] Oh mighty warrior of great fighting stock - might I inquire to ask... eh, what's up, Doc?
Heero: [singing] I'm going to kill the baka!
Duo: O.o *gulp* [singing] Oh mighty warrior, 'twill be quite a task - how will you do it; might I inquire to ask?
Heero: [singing] I will do it with my spear and magic helmet!
Duo: [singing] Your spear and magic helmet?
Heero: [singing] Spear and magic helmet!
Duo: *smirk* Magic... helmet?
Heero: *mouth twitches* Magic helmet!
[Duo is unsuccessfully trying to stave off a fit of giggles. Heero's mouth is twitching uncontrollably.]
Duo: *giggling* Ma...gic... helmet...
[Heero grins evilly. Tiercel is frantically gesturing from the front row, since this is definitely not in the script...]
Heero: Yes, magic helmet. And I'll give you a ... sample.
[Heero hauls Duo out of the hole by the ears and drags him off behind some set bushes. The spear clatters to the floor. Bits of armor clang as they land all over the stage, not quite drowning out the other sounds emerging from behind the bushes. Grey sweatclothes go flying into the first row of seats, smacking Tiercel in the face.]
Heero [from behind bushes]: Leave the bunny ears on.
Tiercel: O.O Uh... that's all, folks.
The End
Why do these things always come to me in the shower? One of these days I'm going to drown when I laugh at the wrong moment...
Tiercel's got a brand new bag.
(:./tiercel/snippets4)
