Date: July 14
Flames to: anakerie@cinci.rr.com
Warning: Rather off the beaten path
Pairings: 2xH implied.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. Or anyone in the camp. (except Stewart)
This is a brief follow-up to Morning Sickness.
Hilde yawned and entered the kitchen, her Scrappy Doo slippers pad-padding on the linoleum floor. She paused to see Heero Yuy sitting at the breakfast table, pouring Cocoa Pops into his mouth directly from the box. Every few seconds he would pause to grab the gallon of milk and take a swing. Her morning paper had been scattered about on the floor and table, and she noticed that the crossword puzzle had all been filled in in Japanese characters.
When Duo awoke, his first thought was that he had been hit by a train.
A few minutes later, he remembered it had been a bowling ball.
It had been a normal enough morning. He had woken up before Hilde and decided to go outside and get the morning paper. Just as he had entered the living room, he saw Heero Yuy standing outside of the window, his arm pulled back as he ran toward it.
Then a large bowling ball had crashed through the glass and right into Duo's head. He barely remembered Heero's gleeful cry of "PERFECT GAME!" before the world faded to black.
He glanced around at his surroundings, and blinked. He appeared to be in a straw hut of sorts. It was very small and contained nothing but a feather cot and a wooden chest. Maybe he was still unconscious and dreaming. Duo felt the bump on his head. No, he was definitely awake. No dream could hurt that bad.
Muttering something about pressing charges, Duo rose shakily to his feet and exited the hut. Well, this was bizarre.
He seemed to be on an island. There were many huts like his own set up, scattered here and there, with a very large hut in the center. He could see numerous other young and even old men strolling about, chatting with each other. Several of them waved to him and he waved back hesitantly. One of the men broke away to approach him. "Greetings." He chirped. "Welcome to the 'Heero's our Hero Re-Education camp."
"Excuse me?" Duo blinked.
"You have been chosen to come here and learn to worship our master, Heero Yuy. You are very lucky to have been picked to join us. Master Heero is very picky about who he chooses to be re-educated."
Duo glared at them man. "He threw a freaking bowling ball at my head, kidnapped me, and brought me to god knows where, and I'm LUCKY? Sorry, my copy of Webster's defines that word a little differently!"
"Many of our students feel that way at first." The man soothed. "But soon they learn to love and adore our master. When he comes to visit, they all argue over who will shower him with the most affection."
"This is NOT happening! You let me go!"
"No one leaves the Heero is our Hero Re-Education Camp."
Duo would see about that. He wanted to go home; he wanted Hilde and Fluffykins. And he wanted to cut Heero into bite-size chunks and feed him to barracudas. He was not in a mood to "shower him with the most affection."
"Come. I'll introduce you to the other students. My name is Stewart, by the way. I was Master Heero's first student; he saw me doing an informerical for hair-removal cream and decided that he simply had to have me."
"Damn it man, your aren't a Precious Moments figurine!"
Stewart was summoning the other men over. Some were naked; others wore loin-cloths. Still others wore black spandex shorts and green tank tops. Duo fought down the urge to either laugh or cry for his mother.
"Good day, Duo." One of the men bowed. "My name is Dave Thomas. I founded Wendy's fast food restaurants. Master Heero fell in love with my Chicken Cordon Bleu, and then with me." Duo averted his eyes; Dave Thomas was not wearing any pants.
"Hello, Duo. I am Jon Arbuckle." A skinny man waved. "Master Heero realized that I was being tortured senselessly by my cat Garfield and rescued me."
"Hi there, Duo. I'm Space Ghost!"
"I am Lt. Worf!"
"I am He-Man."
"I'm Gilligan! Nice to meet you."
"Hey, sugar. I'm RuPaul. Master Heero likes my..."
"Like, hi there. I'm Shaggy!"
"ENOUGH!" Duo yelled. "What is WRONG with you guys? Can't you see you've been brainwashed by a guy with no morals and really, really bizarre tastes?" He spotted Fred Flintstone in the background. "REALLY bizarre tastes?"
"I think Duo needs some time in the Teaching Hut." Stewart commented, and there were nods around him.
"No, let me go!" Duo struggled as he was dragged toward the large hut. "Get your hands off me, you filthy ape!"
Stewart did not respond but shoved Duo into the hut and slammed the door behind him, and lit a wall torch. "Now we begin."
"What is your name?"
"Duo Maxwell!"
*slap*
"WRONG! Your name is 'Heero's Little Love Bunny'!"
"That is NOT my name!"
*slap*
"And hurting yourself isn't going to make me admit that it is, either!"
*slap*
"We're going to be here a while."
Duo blinked as he was led out of the hut toward a long table. "Now it's dinner time." Stewart told him. "I've laid out all of Master Heero's favorites. Seaweed, sushi, and chocolate sardines."
Duo turned green. "I'll pass."
"But how can you love Master Heero if you don't eat like him?" Dave Thomas asked.
"I don't WANT to love Heero! And you said he liked Wendy's!" Duo replied. "I want Wendy's, then."
"Master Heero has given up fast food and we must do the same." Jon intoned. "Eat the seaweed, Duo. Eat what our master has provided for us."
Duo figured that starvation wouldn't help him escape so he nibbled at the weeds the others seemed to relish. He avoided all offers of the chocolate sardines, but did accept a tall glass of Himalayan goat's milk, another of "Master Heero's" personal favorites.
That night, Duo laid back in his cot and stared up at the ceiling of his hut. Outside, he could hear the other prisoners chanting and praying to Heero. Well, not him. Someday he would find a way out of here.
Someday, he would go home again.
End Part 1
(:./lasha/morning02)
