15 Jun 2000
DISCLAIMER: All Gundam Wing characters are property of Sunrise, Bandai Visuals, Sotsu Agency, and Asahi TV. This work is not written for profit, but for entertainment purposes only.
WARNINGS: heavy shonen-ai (kissing); angst; some sap (my fault, not Tzi's); serious flirtation
Pairing: 6x5/5x6 (Implied 13x6, 13x5)
After the first several bites of salad (carefully poking the artichoke hearts out of the way and trying not to be *too* obvious about it) and a bite of Zechs's pasta, as well, Wufei spoke up. "I think we could have done worse," he said with a little smile, looking down at it. / Much worse!/ His own remembered first attempts at cooking anything belied that he'd helped with this at all.
Zechs smiled briefly, then hid it, pretending to be wounded. "Ah! Damning with faint praise... a culinary tragedy..." Dropping his head to his hand, he mourned for a few seconds before peeking up at Wufei through his fingers.
The expression he caught was almost laughter, an action Wufei had not committed in longer than he cared to consider. Finally unable to resist any longer, he *did* laugh, a sound that seemed almost rusted. "It's very good!" the ex-pilot said with a little release of breath, continuing to smile at the blond.
Zechs dropped his hand away from his face and smiled broadly at the boy "You *can* smile. And your face didn't even break. I find myself pleasantly surprised..." He picked up the bottle of wine and poured a small amount into one of the glasses on the table. Setting it in front of Wufei, he then held up his hands as if warding off an impending protest. "Now, I know, I know - you don't drink. But you simply *can't* eat northern Italian pasta without having just a taste of northern Italian white wine. It's off- dry, a hint of sweetness. Makes the sauce come alive on your tongue." He poured some for himself and took a drink. "Really," he added, waving a fork in Wufei's direction, "trust me. It does."
It was a bit of a problem. Wufei wasn't accustomed to even drinking the plum wine that had been a favorite on his home colony and the one time he *had* indulged, he'd been so sick the day after he'd sworn never to touch so much as a drop of alcohol again for the rest of his life. However....
The light shone just right and it was impossible for him, somehow, to tell Zechs Marquise that he would not drink it. And one glass wouldn't hurt so bad, surely! Maybe it would even calm the nervous fluttering that was driving him to distraction!
"...all right."
"Good man," Zechs said, nodding his approval. "So - after dinner why don't you read me a little from one of those books you found today. They seemed to have you completely enthralled."
Ebony eyes widened frantically as Wufei looked down at his plate. He couldn't read... *THAT*... to ~anybody~!!! "Mmmm....." To hide his momentary indecision, he drank, the funny taste of the wine on his palette a momentary distraction. "Maybe." He could feel the frantic color creeping into his ears and down into his cheeks. /Oh, please, let him forget that when it comes time!/
The blond chewed his pasta and regarded Wufei thoughtfully. Noting the boy's heightened color, he frowned and then put a hand to his face before doing a quick visual inspection of himself. "Look - do I have pasta hanging from my chin or something? Because I do believe you're blushing, so I must be doing *something* embarrassing. Out with it, now!" He frowned again, deeper this time and started batting (carefully) at his hair.
"No!" Wufei said quickly. "No pasta or... I mean... but... well, the books I have, they're..." The rest of the sentence was mumbled out so fast Zechs almost missed them as they came tumbling out in a rush that was barely louder than a whisper. "...twentiethcenturyerotica." The color deepened as Wufei ducked his head and stared into his pasta carefully.
Zechs was truly speechless. But the single, platinum eyebrow he raised was eloquence itself. "Wufei," he said at last, voice low and resonant, "I didn't know you had it in you..."
/Oh, I've definitely had it in me,/ came the unbidden thought, /and I'd like it again!/
The embarrassed heat in his face rose further and he rubbed a suddenly damp palm against his pants. "Have you ever walked into a bookstore and seen something that called your name before you ever even knew what it was?" he blurted.
Zechs put an elbow on the table and let his chin fall into it, eyes still locked onto Wufei's. "Yes... on more than one occasion, actually. It's an amazing feeling, don't you think?"
Either the wine wasn't helping or he hadn't drunk enough because that look almost sent him reeling. "Yes," he whispered hoarsely, picking up his glass again, still fiddling with the pasta. He cleared his throat. "Yes, it is."
The blush covering Wufei's cheeks and the state he seemed to be getting in were too delicious not to cultivate, so Zechs continued to gaze, rather suggestively, at the boy across the table. /Treize? You win./
"So tell me, Wufei. What kind of erotica do you like to read?"
/STARS!/ There was no way he could answer that! He... he just couldn't *answer* that! "The ones we bought today are a re-telling of a classic fairy tale... the one about the sleeping beauty... except the prince does more than kiss her." He conveniently left out the fact that all three novels were heavily spiced with BDSM and more than a little homosexuality, a hand coming up to stroke limp black strands of hair behind an ear.
Zechs smiled softly at the boy. "Ah, well - you know princes. They're likely to do *anything.*"
Almond eyes widened frantically as Wufei's tongue darted out to touch his lower lip. He... knew that Zechs was Mirialdo Peacecraft and... that made him a prince... "Oh. Oh, MY!" he said, a breath catching in his chest before releasing quickly.
Another sultry smile from the blond and then, "Well, I'm finished. Are you? C'mon and help me with the dishes." Zechs stood up and carried his plate and the salad bowl into the kitchen, tossing his hair back over his shoulder as he went.
Picking up his own half-finished plate, Wufei paused long enough to drink the rest of the wine (which HAD turned out to be as nice as Zechs had promised) and brought his plate, salad bowl and glass to the counter, laying them beside the sink. He picked up the dishtowel and stood as the water was turned on and soap bubbles filled the sink, the realization of Zechs's closeness almost radiating from the other man as he stood there silently.
They worked in silence until the kitchen was clean. Wiping his hands on a nearby dishtowel, Zechs put Wufei out of his misery. "Don't worry," he said tossing the towel to Wufei whose hands were still damp. "I won't make you read your stories to me. But I would like to do some reading. I'm going to get my book." With that he walked past Wufei, arm just brushing the boy as he passed, and walked off to the bedroom.
If the honest truth were to be told, Wufei would have had to admit that he was greatly disappointed that he wasn't going to be reading to Zechs even as he was simultaneously relieved. Carefully spreading the towel over the edge of the sink to dry, Wufei moved to the living room and his small pallet and cache of clothing, changing quickly into the boxers and t- shirt that had become his the day of his arrival.
The sound of Zechs's footsteps sounded in the hall as Wufei found his own book and settled down on the couch, pulling both feet up under himself slightly as he awaited the other man with baited breath.
Zechs came into the room and slid into his favorite chair, a low-slung number covered with butter soft black leather. He kicked its footstool near to him and stretched his legs out. With the book on his belly, he hooked long arms over the back of the chair and arched his back a bit in a comfortable stretch, eyes closed, sighing softly. The he turned on the floor lamp that stood next to the chair, opened his book, and began to read.
Wufei, for the most part, was glad that it was so easy for *him*. With Zechs in the room, it was patently impossible to read and so he kept reading the same paragraph over and over and over again.
'Squire Felix drew near to Prince Alexi and putting his arms around his hips, he covered Prince Alexi's organ with his mouth and began sucking it.'
The imagery was overwhelming, the notion of doing the same invading his thoughts, and it drew a deep sigh from him as he read the words once more.
The small sound caught Zechs's attention. Peering over the top of his tall book, he watched the boy across the room. Ebony eyes were riveted to the pages, breath coming just a bit ragged, and his cheeks... /Mmmm... such a lovely blush... I might have to borrow that book from him after he's done... it's certainly having an effect.../ His mental monologue was broken off then by the image of brushing his lips across that lovely blush and his body gave a tiny shudder of delight, much as he tried to suppress it. / Read Zechs. You were on the paragraph about military interventions.../
Black eyes, bright and warm from the words they'd caressed over and over, peeked over the edge of Wufei's book to look at the Prince that resided in the room with him. /I could do that,/ he thought, biting on his lower lip as his eyes almost closed, the image of Zechs reading across the way becoming hazy in the fringe of lash and glow of lamplight. /Mmm, kneel down and unzip him and take him in my mo.../The image almost overcame him entirely before he realized what he was thinking and buried himself in his book, almost mortified by the excitement that he felt.
Almost.
An hour went by - an hour in which Zechs read about foreign coup attempts what must have been seven or eight times. They had never seemed a particularly arousing topic before, but now, as he stood, he carefully held the book in front of him, glad for its overall size.
"I'm going to bed," he said to Wufei, still huddled on his makeshift bed, deep in his own reading. "Let me know if there's anything you... need." He turned quickly, heading for the bedroom and rolling his eyes at his own comment.
"Good night," Wufei said, eyes latched onto the rear end heading so temptingly out the door. It sounded... oh, it sounded like an offer. Almost. Just about... but what if it wasn't...?
With a silent groan, he put down his own book and pulled his pillow over his head, body in overdrive and mind right beside it. /Zechs... you're driving me crazy, if I wasn't already there... ah, Treize, Nataku, what should I do?/
Zechs stood in front of the mirror in his bathroom, giving himself a good talking to. "Now look here," he said to his reflection in a stern voice, "This is Chang Wufei. Remember him? And Treize? What the hell do you think you're doing getting all worked up over *him?*" The golden face that looked back at him had flushed cheeks and groaned inwardly. /Did Wufei see that? Oh, God - what if he thinks... Damn!/ He gave up lecturing, stripped down, brushed his teeth and got into bed. When the lights were out, he found himself on his back, staring up at the ceiling, willing himself to think about anything but the boy in the next room.
Silence reigned for some time, darkness having taken over the little house with the last click of a lamp being turned off. It was just as Zechs reached the edge of sleep that a strangely tentative voice whispered from the doorway, "Zechs?" /Oh, let this be the right thing to do.../
"Mmmnpf?" Zechs pulled himself back from edge reluctantly. "Mmm -Wufei?" he said sitting up, peering across the room. His hair was tumbling into his eyes and he was trying in vain to brush it away. "'s that you? Something wrong?"
What little light there was set Wufei's heart to pounding as he stepped further into the room, edging forward. "I, uh... was having problems sleeping and I thought, maybe if I came and l..laid with you for a while...?"
To his credit, Zechs did a fine job of covering up the stunned gasp that halfway escaped his lips. /I've been lying here, naked, fighting with myself to stop thinking about him, and now he wants to come sleep with me. This is bad, Zechs. This is very, very bad. You definately do *not* want to do this. It's completely unwise and could lead to potentially embarassing and uncomfortable situtations. Absolutely NOT./
"Sure," he heard himself say. "Sure, I don't mind."
That brought Wufei steps closer to the bed, careful and slow in the dark. He climbed in on the same side he'd begun on earlier in the day and laid down, once more careful not to touch the other man. "I didn't think I could sleep by myself," he whispered soft and low in the manner of persons laying in bed and talking.
Painfully aware now of his habit of not wearing pajamas, Zechs eased himself down keeping as far away from the boy as possible without looking as if he was actively *trying* to. "Oh?" he said. "I suppose I just assumed that you'd *been* sleeping alone."
"Yes," Wufei answered softly. "But I never really got used to it. I was the oldest of several children and the youngest ones always wanted someone to sleep with them. And I was married for a while, so I got used to that, too." /And there was Treize, but I don't think we ever slept./
>"Ah," Zechs replied, feeling sad for some reason. "Well I was always a >loner I guess." /Until I was 13, that is.../ "I... I didn't know you had >been married. That must have been difficult, being so young."
"It was arranged," Wufei murmured, turning on his side towards Zechs. "We were children, but heirs of her clan always wed at fourteen. I was a little younger than that, but it didn't matter. There were only two clans left in power with the proper bloodlines and the heir to the Amazon tribe was forty and had killed two wives already when we were betrothed... 186, I think it was." He shrugged lightly. "We didn't get along well, but still. There are expectations to fulfill... WERE... expections to fulfill..."
Zechs could feel Wufei's eyes on him, and he wasn't sure if it was a bad thing. "You sound like royalty. I remember my father talking about how the Peacecraft monarchs used to marry. The same thing - they didn't get a choice of *whether* they would marry, they didn't get to choose * who* to marry, and everybody held their breath until an heir had been produced. Barbaric..."
"Did they paraded the sheets the day after the wedding?" Wufei asked, grimace visible even in the dark. "Nailed to boards, proof that it had been done." He sighed.
A tired little laugh from Zechs - "My father said that the girls' mothers used to give them little vials of ox blood to use... Amazing that it was so pervasive a custom."
Wufei frowned slightly. "No, the blood was all hers. It was all over me and her and the sheets and it was... unpleasant," he confessed. God, he'd wanted to talk about it for years, wanted to get the anger and guilt over with and out of him...
He just couldn't believe he was telling any of this to Zechs Marquise, the man who made him feel so...
/Horny,/ his mind suggested. /Hot and wanton and you want to know him better, don't you?/
Sometimes, Wufei HATED his habit of talking to himself like that!
"That must have been horrible," the blond said quietly. Zechs turned his head on the pillow and looked at Wufei. "Something tells me you blamed yourself about it as well," he said softly.
The whisper that sounded was impossibly quiet, a confidence. "Yes." Silence passed for several seconds and Wufei spoke again. "We were just children..."
"But children aren't to blame for what adults make them do." He caught and held the ebony gaze with his own. "It wasn't your fault, Wufei. There's so much..." he broke off for a moment, shifting his gaze to the ceiling. "So much that children just aren't capable of doing. And when you're a child and something needs so desperately to be done and you can't do it... well, at some point, you just have to recognize how little power you had back then... You have to let it go."
Once more he looked over at the boy lying next to him. "You have to let it go, Wufei," he whispered.
During their talk, Wufei had moved closer, slowly, carefully, and as Zechs spoke, he reached out momentarily, touching warm skin, the feel of it a comfort. "Thank you, for listening," he murmured.
Zechs' own memories had been packed into that little speech. Memories of failure and powerlessness - his own set of childhood guilts that had only been aired to one other person. /It's not about you... stop being selfish.../ "Sure," he said casually and rolled onto his side, facing away from Wufei. "Anytime..."
The seeming rejection of that movement hurt and Wufei backed away, becoming quiet. "I think I can sleep now," he murmured, moving to rise. "I'll go back..."
"If that's what you want..." Zechs' voice had taken on an air of melancholy. /Stop thinking about it - take your own advice.../He felt a sudden overwhelming threat of tears behind his eyes. He could be strong, for a while, but sometimes... how he missed having a strong, perceptive lover, who could pull him from these horrible black places... someone who'll listen to all the sad things.../
For a moment, Wufei teetered on the edge of actually getting out of bed but then he laid back down slowly, biting his lip. "Zechs?" he asked quietly.
"Yes?"
"I really don't want to go in there by myself. I want to stay in here with you," he murmured, rubbing a sweaty palm against a thigh.
"That's fine," Zechs said softly. "As I said, it's your choice." Deep despair was resolving itself into a soft, familiar sadness that ached inside of him. He thought again of the empty grave next to Treize, wondering why he wasn't in it all ready. /What is there here for me...? Who...?/
"Zechs?"
"Yes, Wufei?"
A deep breath sounded and then a slow sigh. "When I asked to kiss you earlier... did you mind it?"
Zechs tried to wipe the tears from his lashes and turned over to face theboy. "Mind it? No," he said softly. "No it felt very nice..."
The expression on Wufei's face was solemn as he looked at Zechs in the moonlight, reaching up to touch damp cheeks. "I've made you cry." The bittersweet smile that filtered over the boy's face was self-mocking. "I've always been good at making angels cry."
"You didn't, Wufei. It's just that... sometimes I miss... that is, oh never mind. Believe me, it wasn't your fault. I just feel sorry for myself at times - very immature. Just ignore it.
Those fingers continued brushing as Wufei gave a non-committal, "Mmmm," in response, light, delicate, gentle. "I'm not very good with the right thing to say," he murmured finally.
"It doesn't matter," Zechs said softly. "This is nice, too."
"You know," Wufei whispered, "they say boys aren't supposed to cry... but Zechs... if you need to... then you should...." An arm wrapped slowly about his neck, a hand gently tugging the larger man closer. /The way Shaiming used to cry against my neck,/ he thought sorrowfully, the thought of his younger brother strange and painful in that moment. /Like that.../
"It's not true, you know," Zechs said quietly, finding it somewhat strange that he had no wish to pull away. "Sometimes boys have very good reasons for crying." He brought a hand up and stroked Wufei's hair gently. "And sometimes the things and people we cry for truly deserve our tears.Sometimes that's the only thing we can give them..."
With a slow sigh, Wufei relaxed entirely into that touch. "Yes," he murmured. "Tears can be a beautiful sign of grief and they grant relief for you and for whatever reason you're crying. Sometimes, though, you don't deserve that relief." The thought of Meiran, Nataku, spilled over him as he buried his own face against Zechs's throat, his arms wrapping tightly about the other man's shoulders. "I don't think that's true for you."
"Why would you say that?" the blond said, his other arm slipping around Wufei's waist without thinking, his voice nearly a whisper. "Why do you think I'm so different from you?"
Wufei shook his head slightly, words defeating him at first. When they came, they were hard, at first. "You're so beautiful," he whispered finally, face screwing up slightly, "and so kind. Even when I say things that hurt you, even though I don't mean to, you let it go. You don't hold it against me, that I'm clumsy with words and feelings." The smaller man sighed, swallowed the lump growing in his own throat. "I can let it go, but it's because I usually figure it was my fault anyway... because I don't understand the way I should..."
"Give yourself time, Wufei," came the answer, Zechs's voice low and breathy. "You're not supposed to know how to do everything at 17. That's when most people *start* learning the most important things..." He pressed a cheek to the boy's forehead, still stroking black silk hair. "You don't need to be this hard on yourself. There's a difference between accepting responsibility for your actions, and letting those actions overwhelm you. That's the hardest lesson I ever learned, and I still don't have it down completely - but I'm trying... trying every day. I want you to try, too."
He stopped for a moment and tilted Wufei's chin up, so that they were looking each other in the eyes. "Who was it who told you that you weren't beautiful?" A golden thumb brushed over the caramel skin of one cheek. "Whoever it was lied to you."
The shimmer of moonlit azure eyes left Wufei almost breathless for a moment and he nearly forgot to answer. "No one. I know what I am," Wufei whispered. "Just some scholar boy turned warrior for a while, not anything to get excited about..." The want to reach out and kiss Zechs was in him again and difficult to resist.
"Well, I don't think *I'm* anything to get excited about," Zechs murmured, a hint of playfulness stealing into the melancholy voice. "So we can both be dull and unattractive together..." Wufei's lips were so tempting as he smoothed them with his thumb. So soft and warm... and eyes he could drown in.. But that would be taking advantage...
Unable to help himself, Wufei's tongue flickered over his lower lip as he imagined Zechs kissing him... touching him... "Mmm... someone like you could never be dull or unattractive," he finally whispered, eyes half-closing as he moved a little closer wistfully.
/So close... so small and lovely and warm... could it really hurt? Just one kiss?/ Zechs leaned down and brushed his lips across Wufei's. Not a kiss really, more like a question. "You're very kind to say that," he whispered against them.
"Yes," Wufei whispered, but it wasn't in agreement to Zechs's words. It was instead an agreement to the soft brush of those lips. "Yes..."
Pulling the ebony head towrds him gently, Zechs pressed his mouth against Wufei's, letting it be light and simple - brief kisses, softly broken and newly started, a tender exploration of lips, while his thumb traced the contour of the boy's cheek and his eyes closed in pleasure.
So sweet... It was so sweet and Wufei gave a little exhalation as he opened his mouth to that slow searching, his own little suckles tasting slowly at Zechs's lower lip as his arms wrapped more tightly about the taller man's neck, his eyes closing, heart rabbiting in his chest with a mixture of excitement and nervousness.
"Mmmnnnn..." The open mouth, the warmth beyond, that small surrender, and a long, low whimper came from the older man. Running his tongue along the Wufei's lips, he realized with some delight that the boy wasn't pulling away. Another soft moan and he was exploring the warm cave of Wufei's mouth. It was sweet and spicy, and the soft response coming back so very gratifying...
The sensation of Zechs's kisses were dizzying, the sounds he made leaving Wufei utterly boneless as he returned them with a slow and tentative fervor, shivering with delight at each nudge of tongue and teeth. His fingers wound slowly in platinum tresses and he whimpered, the rest of his body pressing against Zechs almost unconsciously as he sighed against those lips, shivering.
/I want him... I want him, here and now, and I know that's not a good idea.../ Zechs felt himself stiffen at the press of Wufei's warmth against him. It took every bit of control he had to keep from pushing the lovely boy against the mattress and stripping him - leaving him vulnerable to be entered and plundered. The thoughts were maddening, though, and his lips wandered to the tender skin of Wufei's jaw and neck. "Wufei," he panted heavily, "we should probably... mmmm... stop this... now... uhnnn..." But of course at that moment he'd found the sweetest place, in back on one small ear, that begged to be licked...
The words washed over him and weren't even registered as Wufei moaned wildly, the steady nip and suck at his throat sending him into a spiral of utter pleasure that claimed him, made his thoughts turn to dust. His hips rocked forward to press to Zechs and he cried out breathlessly as heated mouth moved to suck behind his ear. "Zechs!" was a thin whimper as he shook in that grasp, unable to think.
For a moment the control was gone. Growling softly, Zechs flipped the boy onto his back and covered him, instinct taking over as his mouth covered Wufei's in a deep, fiery kiss. The dark beauty's skin seemed to sing to him, begging his touch and welcoming the heated kisses he pressed to it before returning to those bruised lips for another drink. Lean hips were beginning to press downward - his body telling him that the one beneath him was to be taken, and taken now. But somewhere in his mind a faint voice of reason still fought to be heard. /Stop, Zechs... too much... he may not even want this, may see you as a stand-in for Treize.../
That sudden motion was enough to bring some small amount of clarity to Wufei as he whimpered, Zechs's hands stroking over his skin even as his own explored the length of the man atop him. "Ah, God... that feels so good...." he babbled, moaning. "Oh...
The voice in his head wasn't leaving Zechs alone. /Get a hold of yourself! I don't care how good it feels! It's too soon and *you* have to be the one to stop... So stop... NOW!/ "Mmmmnnnnr!" With another low growel, Zechs head came up from the feast that was Wufei's body. He panted heavily, looking down at the dark-eyed boy, every part of him straining to go back to what they'd been doing. "Wufei... I... we... we shouldn't do this... right now. This... this is going too fast and I don't mean just for me... aaaarh!" He sat up suddenly, eyes on the wall in back of the bed. "God, it feels so good... but...we should't..."
Wufei closed his eyes, panting for breath. It had felt so good and to have it stop, even with Zechs still pressed against him... "Yeah," he agreed hoarsely. "You're right. You're right..." /No matter how badly I wish we hadn't just stopped./ A shiver chased through him as he swallowed, trying to get control of himself. "Wow."
That single awed word seemed almost childish to him and he smiled, giving a huff of breath that almost resembled laughter before repeating it again. "Oh, wow."
Zechs laughed softly, still getting his breathing under control, "Couldn't have put it better myself." He sat back a bit, still facing Wufei. "So... what should we do now...?"
Those dark eyes were heavy-lidded with passion and with an onslaught of sleepiness, as well, as he got himself a bit more under control. "Wait and see?" he suggested quietly.
The tall blond laughed again. "No... I meant... tonight. Where do you want to sleep?" He found himself, strangely, not wanting to look away from the lovely boy, so he smiled at him softly and waited.
"Can I sleep here?" Wufei asked quietly, looking at that smile with a certain amount of wonderment.
"Sure..." Zechs's reply was hesitant, only because of the temptation it would offer. "Let me just... uh... put on some boxers..." He got up and walked to the small dresser, grateful to be facing away from Wufei, a few moments to calm himself before opening the drawer and pulling out a pair to slip on.
Wufei sighed slightly as he watched that very tempting rear end finally be covered by material. /Ah, that's a shame.../ he thought, intensely grateful for the dark that hid his gaze and the high flush on his face.
Zechs walked back to the bed, laying down again, unsure of how close they should be. He had to laugh inwardly: half of him seemed to be all lust and hormones, while the other half had the mind of a convent-school chaperone. Obviously this wasn't going to be easy... "We should get some sleep," he said softly.
"Mmm," Wufei agreed, heart still thudding in his chest. "We should." /Not that *that* will be easy.../
A lock of hair was falling into Wufei's eyes and Zechs brushed it gently back. A soft stroke to the boy's cheek and then he smiled. "I'm glad you're here, Wufei. Good night." Closing his eyes, he willed himself to go to sleep, but knew it wouldn't be soon.
"Good night, Zechs," came the soft whisper as Wufei closed his eyes.
Both drifted awake in wafts of moonlight for a long time after that before either truly fell asleep.
End of Part 9
(:./kumiko/lvvs9)
