Title: Comfortable Love - 1/2
Author: tkmaxwell777
Category: Shonen Ai/Yaoi
Pairings: 1+2/1x2x1, 3x4x3 (implied)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Angst, Language, Lemon, and Sap
Archived: Yep! Thanks Lev :) Lev's Lair
Original Fiction: www.Writing.Com\authors\tkmaxwell
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or its characters. This story is a parody of their defined universe and is in no way an official continuation of the original story. I consider all underage characters engaging in sexual activity as Emancipated Minors or the social equivalent under military service. This story is for entertainment purposes only. It is a fantasy and should not be read as a representation of reality. Content neither condones nor condemns the lifestyles portrayed. I make no money, I tell no lies J
Heero Yuy stood waiting by the toaster with butter knife in hand. It was another morning, another meal, and another opportunity for amusement. He relished his routine, but he could also savor the moments of spontaneity as well. He'd learned in the past few months to accept both the mundane and the miraculous into his life, much like he enjoyed different cuisine now that he no longer had to live by someone else's standards. Sometimes he ate a more traditional Japanese breakfast, but today he was feeling the need for continental fare. As he took the boiling pot off of the burner on the stove, he heard the quiet shuffling of feet, and his deep blue eyes flicked to the doorway to see a figure making his way into the kitchen. His roommate, partner, and best friend went to the cupboard, pulling out a box of Fruit Loops. Heero couldn't help the small smile that curved his lips as he watched Duo Maxwell, former God of Death and Gundam pilot extraordinaire, reach in and grab a jug out of the fridge.
Duo's hair was hanging loose in long tangles, his face was still flushed from sleep, and his pajama bottoms rode low on his hips. Violet eyes didn't even open as Duo poured the contents of the jug into the bowl filled with cereal. Heero sat two mugs of coffee on the table, one for himself and one close by for the other boy; Duo would need at least three before taking on another day. He then turned as his toast popped up, quickly moving the hot slices onto his plate so he could smear butter on them immediately for it to melt properly. A boiled egg with more butter and some fresh fruit joined the toasted bread, and Heero made his way over to their table to sit down... just in time.
"Son-of-a-bitch! Heero!" Duo yelled out as the first bite of his breakfast informed him that he had once again chosen the orange juice instead of the milk.
Heero smirked, unable to keep the merriment from showing in his eyes as he took in his friend's outraged face. "One of these days you might actually try waking up before you make your breakfast," he said calmly, only years of training keeping him from laughing outright.
"You could have at least SAID something this time," the other boy huffed.
"And where would the fun be in that?" Heero asked as he gave him an unrepentant look.
"I think I liked you better when you didn't have a sense of humor," Duo huffed, his violet eyes glaring as he took another bite of his cereal. He couldn't waste the food, even if it wasn't the best combination. Besides, he was actually getting used to it after having to eat it half a dozen times already in the past few months. He consoled himself by snagging a slice of Heero's toast and a piece of cantaloupe off of the other boy's plate.
Heero smiled softly. "You know that's not true. You're the one responsible for it." He noticed the theft occurring, but he had planned for it; an extra slice of toast and more fruit than he could have eaten alone had been intentionally placed where Duo could get to it.
"Bastard," Duo grumbled, but a smile belied the harsh tone as he glanced up, taking a bite of the fruit.
"Baka," Heero replied, a feeling of contentment stealing over him as they spoke the words that had become a ritual between them over the past year. They had been said in anger more times than once during both wars, but now, they were spoken with a sense of friendship; sometimes, Heero even heard affection in the other boy's tone.
Duo snorted. "Takes one to know one." The words would have had more bite to them if he hadn't had butter on his nose from where he'd taken a bite of toast.
Heero reached over and wiped it off with a napkin, laughing quietly. "Aa. That it does."
Duo looked at him for a moment, smiling at the sound he didn't get to hear too often, even now that the war was over. They continued eating in companionable silence for the next few minutes until Duo got up and placed his empty bowl in the sink. "Gonna go get ready," he announced as he headed out of the kitchen.
"Don't use all the hot water or 'omae o korosu'!" Heero shouted after him.
They lived in a two-bedroom, two-and-a-half bath, two-story house. The first floor had a family room with a fireplace, a living room with a bay window, and a huge kitchen with the half-bath off to the side. The two full baths upstairs made getting ready for work every day much simpler than if they'd only had one. Each bathroom had it's own water heater as well; Heero just liked to aggravate Duo about how long he spent in the shower. Heero had to admit that if he had that much hair to rinse shampoo out of, it would take him much longer than Duo ever did, but his threat was another one of those things they did to annoy each other, just because they knew each other so well and could get away with it - like when Duo sang off-key in the car, even though Heero knew the boy had a beautiful voice that carried perfect pitch.
Heero placed his own plate in the sink and then made his way into their room to grab some clean underwear before heading to the other bathroom. Even though they could have each had their own bedroom, they'd opted to use one of them as a computer room, sharing the other one. It seemed to help with the nightmares both of them tried to never admit having. Two queen-sized beds filled the space, along with a rather large entertainment center along one side of Duo's bed by the wall, a shared dresser against the adjacent wall, and a bookshelf by Heero's bed across the room. A huge TV/VCR/stereo system filled the shelves of the wooden monstrosity that Duo prized even more than his bed. Heero often teased the braided boy that he would be happy sleeping on the floor so long as he could watch movies; Duo never disagreed.
It didn't take long for Heero to shower. He was out and dressed by the time Duo came walking into their room, drying his hair. Duo sat down on his bed and began to brush through the gleaming mass; Heero watched, as he did every morning. It never occurred to Heero to wait for the other boy downstairs. Duo never objected to Heero's presence while he finished getting ready, and Heero never considered the possibility of it bothering Duo that he was there. Just another one of those comfortable things they did.
"You want to get pizza from Torilino's tonight?" Duo asked as he began braiding.
Heero shrugged. "Sure. Sounds good."
Duo flipped his braid behind him and stood to walk over to the huge walk-in closet. He was wearing a pair of silk boxers that had smiley faces with their tongues sticking out all over them and the words 'You wish', and Heero couldn't help but shake his head and smile. Of course, the 'Help me, I can't get out' pair with the little handcuffs all over them was at the top of his favorites list of the ones Duo owned, along with the 'My face is even prettier' pair that had bright fluorescent flowers all over them. Then there were the infamous 'My body, my way' ones that Heero figured he was the only one to get to see. Duo rarely went out and didn't seem to ever go beyond kissing when he did, at least from what he said. It worried Heero in a way, but then again he was happy Duo wasn't flippant about sex. It was safer not to be. Besides, Heero felt that Duo should be loved for the wonderful person he was, not used as a means of release for someone who didn't want a relationship. He was almost certain that Duo felt the same way.
"We need to pick up some beverages of the carbonated variety as well," the voice from the closet intoned.
"Aa. We can stop by the store on our way home," Heero replied.
Duo emerged already wearing his pants, pulling on his Preventers' shirt. With another look in the mirror, he turned and smiled. "Ready for another fun-filled day of intrigue and adventure?"
Heero got up from where he'd been sitting on his own bed. "I just hope we don't get stuck on another bodyguard assignment. That last one was cruel and unusual punishment," he said as they went out the bedroom door.
Duo laughed, bounding down the stairs, Heero following. "What? You didn't like shadowing that emissary last week?"
Heero glared at his partner when they reached the bottom. "Duo, he offered me money to move to his country and become part of his harem."
Duo smirked. "I don't blame you for turning him down," he replied as they walked out the front door. "He wasn't good looking enough to quit your job for. Besides, you're worth a hell of a lot more than what he was willing to pay."
Heero grunted but didn't comment.
Duo had never been more relieved to get out of a meeting in his entire life. They had been in a conference room at one of the other buildings all day. He could tell that even Heero was tired from just sitting, and Duo had been fidgeting ever since after lunch. He'd amused himself with doodling different caricatures of the occupants of the room on his notepad; he could have sworn Heero had been forced to choke down his laughter more than once, especially at the little pic of Quatre wearing a ballerina outfit. It was a good thing the other boy was a friend, or Duo would have been dead when Quatre had leaned over to see what he was doing. As it was, the blonde had simply turned as pink as the outfit would have been if Duo had colored it. The braided boy had been proud of his accomplishment; he'd been even prouder when Heero had almost strangled on a mouthful of coffee once he'd glanced over at the finished drawing.
As they made their way back to their office, one of the new agents stopped Duo. He was blonde, medium build, and good looking, in Duo's estimation. The former Deathscythe pilol could guess what the young man wanted. Duo was always getting asked out on dates, but normally not when Heero was with him. He'd often wondered why people didn't approach him when Heero was around, but had finally decided it was a good thing; he didn't want to get involved with anyone at the present time, especially someone at the office.
"Hey, Clemens," Duo greeted the blond, following him over to stand against the cubicles when motioned to do so. He braced himself, wondering why he didn't just start a rumor that he was involved with someone so everyone would leave him alone.
"Maxwell, I was wondering... um... do you think... could we... how about dinner tomorrow night?"
Duo couldn't help but sigh. "Listen, Mark. You're a nice guy, and I really like you, but..."
"You're not interested," Mark finished. The disappointment was evident in his soft brown eyes.
"Sorry, man," Duo offered, "It's not that you're not attractive. You are. It's just... well... I'm..."
Mark interrupted, "It's okay. You don't have to explain."
Duo gave him a friendly grin as he extended his hand. "We can at least be friends. Maybe do lunch?"
Mark nodded... not really happy, but at least accepting. "Sure thing, Maxwell."
They talked for a minute about the company softball team, the new office supplies requisition procedures, and the need for a more casual dress code before Mark excused himself. Duo turned to find Heero waiting for him and felt his face redden slightly. He hated it when Heero saw people hit on him. It didn't happen very often, but it always made him feel so guilty. Heero never got asked out. Duo didn't know if the Japanese boy was glad about that or not. It certainly wasn't because Heero wasn't good looking; on the contrary, Duo thought Heero was the best looking guy at Preventers... hell, on the planet for that matter.
Of course, he'd never told Heero that.
"Hey, you okay?" Heero asked softly as they continued towards their office.
Duo looked over at him. "I hated doing that. Maybe I should have agreed to go, yanno, just to be nice."
"Duo, you're always telling me that you don't want to get involved with anyone working here. It wouldn't be fair to lead Clemens on, would it?"
"No," Duo agreed, albeit sadly. He failed to mention that he meant anyone but a certain someone. "You're right. I guess I just wish..."
"What?" Heero asked as they entered their office. The dark haired boy went over to his desk and picked up a file folder before glancing back up.
Duo looked at him for a moment, his eyes filling with an emotion he hoped Heero never recognized. "Nothing. You're right. Thanks for reminding me." He smiled a little to convince the other boy.
Heero searched his face for a moment then nodded. "That's what I'm here for."
Duo was about to sit down when he realized he was missing something. "Oh shit!" he exclaimed. "I left my notepad in the other building by the copier."
"I'll get it," Heero offered, rolling his eyes in mock exasperation, causing Duo to grin at him.
Duo could tell that Heero was trying to get him in a better mood. He appreciated it when Heero did stuff like that. "Thanks, partner."
Heero sighed dramatically, causing Duo to actually laugh before Heero walked out of the office.
Heero replayed the conversation he and Duo had just had as he walked out of their office; something wasn't right. It seemed like the other boy longed for companionship, but every time someone approached him, Duo refused to even see if that person could be what he wanted. Heero didn't understand it. He didn't date because he didn't feel the need to. He was happy with his life. Why complicate it? Sexual frustration had never been a problem for him, so he'd never sought a sexual partner. If he wanted someone to talk or do things with, he had Duo. They practically spent all of their time together as it were, so what difference did it make? He enjoyed being with Duo and that was what was important. He just wished Duo cold find someone who could be what he needed. Duo wasn't like him. The braided boy needed someone, and Heero didn't know what to do to help Duo find that person. For some reason, the thought of losing Duo to a lover made Heero feel empty inside, yet he wanted Duo to be happy more than anything.
As he made his way down the hall they'd just walked through only a few minutes ago, he passed by the cubicles where Duo had spoken with Mark. He thought about finding Clemens and talking with the other agent. Mark seemed to be a nice guy, and if Heero encouraged him, maybe the blond could work on Duo. The former Wing pilot was so consumed with his own thoughts, he barely registerede the voices coming from behind the partitions.
"You shouldn't have asked Maxwell out, especially in front of his partner. Didn't you know he and Yuy are involved? You're lucky Heero trusts him so much."
Heero stopped in mid-step. He couldn't have heard that right...
"How was I to know?" came Mark's voice. "I mean, I just thought they worked together."
"Well, everyone around here knows that they're a couple." Heero recognized the answering voice as Agent Robbins, one of the veterans in the department. "They've probably been lovers since the first Eve's War ended. Hell, all you have to do is look at how protective Yuy is of Maxwell, and how Maxwell looks at Yuy, to know they love each other. Maxwell might be friendly, even flirty sometimes, but he's committed to Yuy, let me tell you. And Yuy would walk through fire for him. I think it's great that they were able to have such a strong relationship in the middle of that crazy mess. Damn lucky, if you ask me."
Heero turned around and was already moving back towards his office before he realized it. His mind was whirling. Could they be right? Could Duo love him? It was a possibility that he'd never considered, something that had never even entered his mind at any time. His thoughts from just moments before seemed to intermingle with what the two men had said, and suddenly, it all went 'click' in a very ominous way. He thought about all the times he'd seen Duo looking at him with that unreadable expression on his face, that indecipherable emotion in his eyes. Then there was the tone of his voice, warm and caring at times, and something completely different at others, almost sounding husky with some unnamed need. Could it be that those were the times he was... attracted... to Heero?
He reached their doorway and stood just inside it, taking in the sight of the boy who had been his friend for the past three years. What if it was true? What if Duo cared for him as more than a friend? He had to find a way to be sure. He couldn't just assume something like that. After all, if he was wrong, Duo might get angry that he even thought it possible. He would have to be subtle in how he went about this. He would have to take his time and look for confirmation of his suspicions. He would have to come at this from a mission-standpoint, gathering information, planning a solid line of attack, and giving himself several retreating options. He would have to...
"That was quick," Duo said without looking up. "Did you find it?" When Heero didn't say anything, violet eyes shifted to meet his, concern evident. "Heero? You okay, man?"
"Are you in love with me?" Heero blurted out. Well, so much for being subtle. He watched as a shocked expression took over Duo's face. Then those violet eyes filled with something he'd never thought he'd see there - fear. It stunned him almost as much as the idea of Duo having stronger feelings for him.
"Wh-what?"
Heero walked towards him. He wanted to know the truth; needed to know the truth. Duo's reaction alone seemed to lend credence to the idea, and Heero wasn't going to let it go. "I heard a couple of the agents talking," he began explaining. "One of them said that everyone around here thinks we're lovers because of the way we act with each other. Did you know that?"
Duo blinked, seemingly shocked. "No one's ever said anything to me..."
Heero continued, "The one agent said that they could tell by the way you look at me that you love me. Apparently they think we've been lovers for quite a while. My protective tendencies are perceived as my mutual affection for you."
"Heero, I swear, I never ever said anything that would make them think..."
Heero cut him off, "Is it true though? Are you in love with me?"
Duo closed his eyes. "Heero... listen... I just... I mean... You have to understand... I..."
Heero could see that the braided boy was getting upset, and he didn't want that. He moved until he was standing beside Duo's desk and laid a hand on his friend's shoulder, causing violet eyes to fly open at the contact. Heero sighed. "Duo, I'm not angry with you. No matter what, we're still friends. I just want to know the truth." He saw the other boy relax a little, but the fear was still there. "Are you in love with me?"
Duo sat there staring at him for a few moments before he finally answered in a defeated voice, "Yes."
Heero felt relieved and terrified at the same time. Yes. That one word held more power at the moment than a hundred Gundams. He tried to come up with some kind of response that wouldn't either hurt Duo or scare him. Finally, he just nodded and said, "Okay."
Duo looked at him in confusion. "Okay?"
"You can't help how you feel, Duo," Heero replied, "and I have to admit I'm flattered that someone like you would feel that way about me. You're so... full of life, and I'm... well, I'm still trying to figure out how to make breakfast interesting." He saw Duo smile at that and felt the tension lift a little. "I'm sorry that I never... noticed before. I never thought..."
"It's all right, Heero," Duo interrupted, his voice wavering slightly. "I know that you don't feel the same, and I'm okay with that. I just don't want to lose my best friend. I can handle a lot of things, but that's not one of them. We've become so comfortable around each other. I need that more than anything."
Heero saw the certainty of Duo's words in his eyes and felt the emotions inside of his own heart begin to respond... which reminded him of another reason why he'd avoided relationships. Suddenly, he felt the need to be alone. There were things that needed to be dealt with before he could go any further. "Listen, I'm going to call it a day. I need to go somewhere for a while where I can think."
Duo's face paled. "Heero, please don't run away from me," he said in a low voice. "I know this is hard to accept, but I promise to not let it interfere with our friendship or with our partnership. Please, I can't take it if you just disappear and never speak to me again."
Heero snorted. "I'm not going to do anything like that. I'll be home later. I just need to be alone for a while. I promise, Duo, you're not going to lose me as a friend. I just need to work through some things."
"Promise me that you'll be home," Duo demanded, his eyes flashing with the vow of retribution if Heero lied to him, but Heero couldn't miss the frightened tone in the boy's voice either. It was the same tone Duo had when he cried out in his sleep at night. Heero didn't want Duo to sound like that.
"I promise. I'll leave the car for you. I can take the bus to where I'm going." With that, Heero turned and walked out the door. He was going to go to Pi's and figure out what the hell to do. His life had just become a lot more complicated...
As soon as Heero walked out the door, Duo laid his head back against the chair and closed his eyes. This wasn't happening... this was NOT fucking happening!
"Hey, Duo, I need to see those reports on..." Quatre stopped speaking as soon as he caught sight of his friend. "Duo? What's wrong?"
Duo looked up at the blond, his face filled with anger. "Did you know that there were rumors about me and Heero going around the office?"
Quatre's aqua eyes went wide with shock. "What?"
"Yeah. Heero overheard some of the guys talking. Apparently, everyone around here thinks we're already lovers. He came back here and asked me if I was in love with him... and heaven help me, Quatre, I couldn't lie!" Duo ran his hands through his bangs, trying to rein in his emotions.
"Oh, Duo," Quatre whispered as he moved closer to his friend. "What did he say? Was he angry?"
"No," Duo replied bitterly. "He told me it was okay and that we were still friends, but he left, Cat!" Duo felt the anger building... anger at the other agents for assuming that about them, even if it was true about him... anger at Heero for walking out... anger at himself for feeling this way. "He said he needed to be alone... to think. That can't be good! You know how he gets!"
Quatre couldn't help but smile. "Duo, I can understand him needing to think about this. It had to have been quite a shock to discover that his best friend wants to be his lover. I mean I know it's hard for you too, having to wait for him to work through it, but you have to give Heero some time to adjust."
"Did Trowa do that?" Duo asked quickly, needing more reassurance from the blond.
Quatre grinned. "Trowa left the whole damn colony for two months when I told him, Duo, and he didn't even tell me he was going to do it. Did Heero say he was coming home later?"
"Yeah."
"Then believe me, Heero is being more than reasonable. If he said he wasn't angry then don't worry about it. Obviously, there's more going on than you know about. Just wait and see what happens."
Duo sighed; he hated waiting. "I just don't want to lose him, Cat. He's everything to me."
Quatre patted his shoulder. "No, not everything, Duo. Not yet, anyway, but maybe this will change that."
Before Duo could respond, Quatre turned and left.
Heero sat in the teahouse, sipping on his Oolong. He tried to make it there at least once a week, normally whenever Duo went out to lunch with Howard. The atmosphere was soothing, the oriental music in the background, comforting, the Asian food and drink, filling. He'd been quite impressed with how authentic the place was, but then again, with an owner like Makiko Pi, how could it not be?
Makiko Pi had come from Japan decades ago, opening her little shop in the middle of the Asian district. Her reputation had grown among those who appreciated traditional food. She taught the art of the Japanese Tea Ceremony to those who asked, but she welcomed everyone into her house with a friendly greeting and words of wisdom. Heero had been surprised by what she'd said to him today.
"You are beginning a journey that will lead you to love and better life."
Heero was still pondering those words as he poured another cup of tea. He was feeling calmer now that he was there. The tranquility of the place eased his doubts, and he was able to allow his emotions freedom to roam so he could analyze them. He thought about the changes that would come from what had happened, whether he decided to become Duo's lover or not. He thought about how other people could sometimes see things inside of you that you did not, even when those things were as plain as the nose on your face. Then he thought about how Duo had looked when he'd admitted to Heero that he loved him, and that was where his musings halted.
Heero had never thought that Duo Maxwell would be so afraid of his feelings. Heero had always thought he was the one who was the expert at that; yet, Duo had hidden those feelings he'd felt inappropriate or not reciprocated, accepting that he would remain Heero's friend and nothing more. Duo had resigned himself, seeming to be content with being friends, yet longing to become more than that. He had denied himself something without even finding out if he could have it.
And that hurt Heero.
The fact that Duo couldn't trust him with those emotions, couldn't trust him to understand, couldn't trust him to at least consider them, hurt Heero in a way he didn't know he could be hurt. That alone showed him just how deep his own feelings for the braided baka were. It wasn't that he needed to accept Duo's feelings - that was already a given. He would never turn away from the other boy just because Duo felt more than friendship for him. No, what he had to think about was how he was going to respond to those feelings. He'd never attempted a relationship before like that. Relena had tried, but Heero had made it clear to her that she would never be what he needed. Could Duo be?
There were things Duo needed to know, things Heero hadn't ever told him, and things that could affect not only this possible relationship but their friendship as well now that Duo's feelings were out in the open. As Heero sipped his tea, he recalled with clarity those things he had never shared with another person. Could he tell Duo? Could he trust him when Duo hadn't been able to do the same? Heero looked into his cup. He knew Duo tended to hold onto what he had instead of reaching for something more. It was something from his childhood, and Heero had learned to understand that. Just like he was going to have to learn to understand this. Was he willing to try?
"No journey is without risk," Pi said as she walked up to his table, placing a cherry blossom by his water glass, "but some risks are worth taking." She then continued on her way, taking a moment to talk with each of her other patrons.
Heero smiled slightly. The woman was old, and probably senile, but she was right.
End Part 1
(:./tk/comflove1)
