OK, this is a very, very silly crossover of Gundam Wing & Utena. I think I'll make this my one and only fanfic where Wufei's not straight.
Prologue: Once upon a time, years ago, there was once a young beautiful prince who was quite sad because both his parents had died and his sister was totally brain damaged and had to be sent away for her own safety. But then a slightly older prince came riding by. He had a regal bearing and kind smile and mighty strange eyebrows. He kissed his tears away, saying, "Ah, little one who bears up alone in such sorrow. Never lose the strength of nobility even when you grow up." The prince with the ever so interesting eyebrows gave him a rose ring and invited him to OZ academy promising that one day they would meet again. The young, grieving prince looked at the rose ring and thought to himself, This could be an engagement ring. So, he decided to go to OZ academy and follow in his footsteps. Ah, but was that such a good idea?
Main story: The Rose Bridegroom
"Zechs-sama," screamed the girls as he walked in his school uniform, his long blonde hair down loose. Yet, they had no effect on him. He only dreamed of the prince who gave him the rose ring. He had finally made it into OZ academy, but perhaps his prince was already gone. He sighed.
Zechs was walking down the hallway when he smells the scent of roses. That smell brought back memories of that first encounter. He looked out the window to see his prince in a hothouse rose garden, watering them and smelling them. He was dressed impeccably in his uniform as he had remembered. How elegant and how like him, Zechs smiles, so happy is he that he has finally found him. Then he saw a woman with glasses and a hairstyle that was quite unflattering with its braids and ribbons drag the prince out and smack him. "That's much too harsh!" he cries out. Une then proceeds to drag the prince after her. "Treize, get out here."
At last I know his name, Zechs thought.
All the duellists are gathered. Wufei crosses his arm, and says, "I have heard that you have been treating the Rose Bridegroom poorly. I hear you've been wearing him out."
"I assure you it's a love-love situation," snarls Une. "Isn't it, Treize-sama?"
"I am the Rose Bridegroom. I must do whatever the duellist who wins me commands." He sighs and sniffs a rose.
Besides, who else will fight for him?"
Wufei looks around to see Trowa and Quatre attempting to fuse at the mouth while Heero is too busy fencing Duo, er, fencing with Duo. Meanwhile, Treize looks beseechingly at Wufei, but Wufei runs off to a corner and decides to polish his, um, sword.
"Problem solved," says Une, smiling. Thank God, the rest of the duellists aren't interested in my man, she thought. I'm glad the rest of the G boys are interested mainly in each other.
However, on the way back to the academy, she bumped into Zechs. "Watch where you're going!" she snapped at him.
"Une, I challenge you to a duel. You must not treat Treize like that."
Une sees the rose ring on his hand and says, "I see you're a new duellist." Damn, she thought. I thought I paired all those guys off, well, except Wufei. Hmmmm, Wufei and Zechs? Nah. "After school, meet me at the arena at the back of the school in the forest."
"Good."
Zechs saw a door and tried to open it. "I wonder if you need a key."
A drop of water hits his ring and arcs of water pour out behind him, causing the door to open and a vast staircase to appear before him. A very strange song came out of nowhere as he made his climb up. He looked up to see a circular ring in the sky.
Once, he get up to the top, he sees Une and Treize waiting for him on a large platform without a railing. "What's that circle up in the sky?" he asks. "I didn't see it from the school."
"It's a mirage. It's called a colony. If you revolutionize the world, it's supposed to descend and change things forever. But I'm curious how you got that rose ring."
"I was given it a long time ago."
"Well, never mind. Treize, get us ready."
Treize puts a green rose on Une's lapel then a yellow one on Zechs.
"What is he doing here?" says Zechs.
"It's his place as the Rose Bridegroom," says Une.
Treize says to Zechs, "If the rose is knocked off your lapel, you lose. Do your best."
Une smacks Treize on the back of the head. "You belong to me, damn it! Don't tell him to do his best."
Treize bows his head and says, "Forgive me mistress."
"Why are you doing whatever she says?"
"The duellist who wins becomes engaged to the Rose Bridegroom. The Rose Bridegroom has to do whatever the duellist requests."
"Now do that thing."
Treize groans and says, "Oh, do I have to?"
"Do it!"
Treize then says, "Rose of the noble castle, Power of Dios that sleeps withing me, heed your master and come forth." Treize swoons in Une's arms and a real, metal sword comes out of his chest.
Une pulls out the sword and says, "Grant me the power to bring the revolution."
Zechs smiles whle walking home. Une put up a good fight, but being a prince meant that you had to learn how to fight well. I won that duel, he thought, then he frowns. Where is Treize? He disappeared right after I fought with Une over him.
Treize steps out and says, "I've been waiting for you a long time, Zechs-sama. I am the Rose Bridegroom. From now on, I belong to you. I am here to serve your needs."
"What kind of needs?"
"Why, all sorts of needs," says Treize coyly.
"And is it true that the Rose Bridegroom has to live with the duellist who wins him in the same dorm room."
Treize nods enthusiastically.
"Is it also true that it's in a dorm that's completely uninhabited except for us so nobody can hear us if there's, oh, I don't know, screaming?"
Treize purrs out his answer. "Every single bit of it is true."
"I can ask you to do anything and you have to do it."
"I have no choice to obey."
Zechs allows a feral little smile to cross his face. "I say that tonight is the night we duel with our swords and polish them with . . .our tongues."
Treize feels flushed with excitement. This engagement business is finally working wonders for me, he thought.
"Then afterwards, how about a rose-scented bath?"
With tears in his eyes, Treize says, "You are a true prince."
So, they were happy, duelling & polishing their swords every night. Treize also showed Zechs some very interesting sword stances and techniques that were sure to score. . .points in fencing. There was quite a bit of pointing and thrusting that left them both quite deliriously exhausted.
Of course, there was still the problem of Une continually trying to poison, shoot and push Zechs off tall buildings. But after a couple of weeks of that kind of behavior, she was expelled.
Then the dreaded day came when the card arrived in the mail. Treize picked it up and read. "Oh, dear!" But worry was mixed with a dollop of excitement in his voice.
"What is it?"
"Wufei has challenged you to a duel."
"Seriously?" Zechs said, puzzled.
"I am also puzzled," said Treize. "Wufei keeps saying he's straight. Mind you, I'll be happy if he's not."
Zechs raised an eyebrow. "I think some sword polishing is in order, Treize!"
Zechs waited with Treize on the platform for a half hour. "Where is that guy?"
Treize sighed. "I have no idea." Oh, how disappointing, he thought. He was so looking forward to swooning in Zechs's arms and being fought over by his blonde god of love and the cutest Chinese guy in the Universe.
"You seem eager for him to come up. You don't want me to lose, do you?'
"Of course not. How can you say that?"
"In the middle of the night, you whimper his name. What's so hot about that guy? What does he have that I don't?"
Before Treize could answer, he heard screams of "kisama" and thrashing. Zechs and Treize saw Wufei being dragged up the stairs by the other Gundam pilots. Duo said, "C'mon Wufei, you know you want Treize, now go and get him."
"It's lies, all lies." shrieks Wufei.
"Then why do you moan his name at night?"
"I do not."
Heero pulls out a tape recorder and plays back Wufei groaning Treize's name.
Wufei scowls. "Fine, I'll duel."
The other Gundam pilots walk down the stairs to leave the threesome alone.
Treize swoons in Zech's arms and Zechs pulls out the sword, no, not that sword, the real sword of Dios.
Wufei and Zechs fight magnificently. Their swordwork was so intense that their pants and their shirts were cut to ribbons. The only thing left on them was a small strip of cloth holding up the roses and their boxers. Treize was in seventh heaven at the sight of both of them with so little on.
Realizing that he wanted them both, he yelled, "Stop! We must all live together!"
Both the duellists stop and look at him, then each other. "Did you hear what I thought he said." said Zechs.
"I think so."
"Sounds like fun." Zechs looks at the yummy little morsel standing before him. This guy's cute with such a sweet face if only he'd stop scowling. Treize has got great taste, I'll admit that much, he thought.
"No," says Wufei.
"Why?"
"I'm straight."
Treize sighs. "Tell the truth, Wufei."
"I want to be on top some of the time. It's so unjust." Wufei wept.
Treize and Zechs hem and haw. "Oh, I just don't know," says Zechs. Treize seems deep in thought.
Profoundly insulted, Wufei pulls down his pants and shows off his... Wu.
Zechs says, "Wuuuuuuuufei!" in amazement. Treize mops his brow at the sight.
Wufei pulls his shorts back on. "Just because I'm small in stature doesn't mean I'm small everywhere else."
They quickly accepted his demand. The revolution didn't happen, the colony didn't fall and they all lived happily ever after except when Treize would call Wufei things like Parfait, Buffet and Wu-baby. Then Wufei would threaten to stick his exercise bar where the sun didn't shine, which would make Treize very excited.
The End
(:./mk/revolution)
