7 Jan 2001
Dinner with Relena.
DISCLAIMER: All Gundam Wing characters are property of Sunrise, Bandai Visuals, Sotsu Agency, and Asahi TV. This work is not written for profit, but for entertainment purposes only.
PAIRINGS: 6x5/5x6, 13x6/6x13, some very mild 4x9
WARNING: AU/modern day San Francisco; implied yaoi will turn to yaoi and eventual lemon in later chapters
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT: To Alfred Hitchock who directed the incredible film, "Vertigo."
Language note: "yang ren" means "foreigner" or "Westerner" in Chinese.
"Dreams are the Royal Road to the unconscious."- Sigmund Freud
"January 25 - Chinese New Year
I'm up early to make Jin Dui for Zechs's breakfast. We'll be going to my mother's house this afternoon, after the parade, and I wanted to make him something special, by myself. She gets silly when she's around him (hmm, must run in the family...) She always thinks he needs stuffing with food, since he's so big. Poor guy - a six foot *yang ren* and he's helpless in the face of a 5' nothing Chinese lady.
When these are done I'm going to take them into the bedroom with some tea and serve them to him. Naked.
I'll tell all later."
The phone rang and Treize jumped from his seat at the desk. His cheeks were a bit red, and his breathing a little uneven, but besides that he was fine. /Maybe I should take this diary home and read it there... it might be more of a bedtime book.../
He picked up the receiver, expecting Hilde or one of his more suicidal clients, but it was Relena. "Hello, Dr. Khushrenada. I hope you don't mind my calling like this."
"Relena," he said, in puzzled surprise, "ah... no, not at all. I don't have a patient right now. What can I do for you?"
"Two things, really," she said. "First, Zechs wanted me to call and tell you he can't make the appointment this afternoon. He and I are having to sort through some papers before noon tomorrow and unfortunately we won't have time for dinner, let alone anything else. I hope you don't mind ?"
/Of course I mind. I want to see my Zechs... oh God, Treize! Just listen to yourself! One long hug and all your morals go straight down the drain!/
It had been a very long hug, as it turned out. Treize hadn't had the heart to move, so he let Zechs sleep, head on his chest, for a couple of hours while he dozed himself. They'd said rather bleary goodbyes around 3 am and he had driven back to his apartment in a haze of pleasure, just having had that much. Since then, he'd been rather surprised to realize that he intended to conduct Zechs's therapy in any way that would help him make progress, and Anne be damned. He would just have to be discrete around her.
He had left Relena waiting on the other end and now shook his head, saying, "No, of course not. I know life sometimes is like that. Just tell him I'll see him on Thursday, all right? Was there something else?"
"Yes," she said, her voice lowering. "I thought you should know - he's still having his nightmares. He was telling me about them this morning and, frankly, I don't think he's planning to tell *you.* He really wants to get better - in part because he knows *you* want it so badly - so he may choose not to tell you that the dreams haven't gone away."
"Well, then maybe it *isn't* a good idea if he misses today," Treize said in concern. It had been over a week since Zechs had mentioned any nightmares, and the return of them could mean a relapse that he needed help with.
"Hang on," she said, "I'll ask him again."
There was a sound of the mouthpiece being muffled. Relena talked a bit with someone else, obviously Zechs, and then came back to the phone. "He says he's all right - he's a bit of a stoic, you know. But it's true, this deadline was somewhat unexpected and we really do need to get through this stuff." She paused and then said, "Perhaps you could come over here? That would let you see him and we could still get the paperwork done. I mean, he *has* to eat dinner at *some* point, doesn't he?"
"Well," Treize pondered for a moment, "would it work if I came at the time of his appointment? Five o'clock?"
"It's a bit early for dinner, but we can manage. Sure! Why don't we see you then?"
"Five o'clock it is," Treize agreed and the both rang off.
Glancing at his clock, Treize found he had 30 minutes before he needed to leave for the Marquise house, so he stretched out on his sofa and opened Wufei's diary again.
"January 26th
Writing from bed. Zechs had to go meet someone for lunch downtown and I get a day off to laze around in bed. I plan on sleeping and reading until he gets back and then... Well let me just say we definitely need a replay of last night.
The parade was wonderful. Most of my friends from Tai Chi were there, doing something. In fact, now that I think about it, this was the first year that *I* didn't do anything. Weird, huh? I just wanted to watch this year - and I guess to be there to really see it through Z's eyes. He kept asking what everything meant and the crowd we were standing in kept staring up at him. Poor guy, he'll never, ever be unobtrusive in Chinatown.
Then we went to my mother's and stuffed ourselves like pigs. It was a good thing we decided to walk home from there, otherwise we would have just rolled into bed, groaned, and gone to sleep.
As it was we *did* do a lot of groaning, but it was the *good* kind... heh heh.
I can't put into words what it's like to be with him. We're just a perfect fit together, everything feels like it was meant to be. There's no pain when he's inside me - just an incredible fullness that makes me lose control. My mother believes that sometimes people are made just for each other - just for themselves. I haven't told *her* this yet, but I think it's that way with Z and me. It still stuns me though, that he thinks the exact same way about me that I do about him."
Treize felt a small tremor of sadness go through him. /And I have aspirations of stepping in here? Perhaps I'm being a fool... I don't even know how he feels.../
The color of ink changed in the next paragraph. "That was the phone. S wants to talk - doesn't sound happy. I think she's feeling bad about what she and Z had together, though why talking to me would help is anyone's guess. I'd have thought it would make her feel worse.
In any case, I'm going to her place tomorrow to see if I can make her feel any better. Better not tell Z, though - he'd just get all worried again.
Think I'll end it here - I want to curl up and fall asleep fantasizing about last night... hmm... Z better get home *soon*..."
Treize's mind came up against the puzzle of S again. He knew Zechs had had some close friends, some of whom were female, but he had no idea whether any of them thought their relationship with him was more than that. That's certainly who S seemed to be, though.
He made a mental note to talk to Zechs about it and then began tidying up to leave for the day. Within ten minutes he was in his car, heading towards Pacific Heights.
Cathrine herself ushered him into the house and led him up to Relena's room. She smiled at him as he came in and it seemed to light up her face, causing him to smile, too.
"Hey, Doctor - thanks for being flexible. Poor Zechs is in with our solicitor right now. The man tends to get hysterical when our trust fund wiggles the wrong way. But my brother is usually very good at calming him down."
"Ah, so *that* was the paperwork scramble - trust fund irregularities, eh?" He gave her sly look. "Are you secretly planning on making a break for the Bahamas with your brother's money?"
She laughed. "Oh, yes - I'm quite the jet setter - can't you tell by all the country stickers on my wheel chair?"
Shaking his head in mock disapproval he said, "He'll be begging on the streets and you'll be being fanned by bar boys at the resort. I can see it all now... By the way, can I help with dinner at all?"
"Oh, don't bother - Cathrine rang up for Chinese. It should be here in about 30 minutes. *So* - what can we talk about until then? Is it busy at the clinic where you work?"
"Always," he said, taking the chair by her bed. "As long as there are people there will always be problems to handle. My supervisor said the other day that we might have to start turning prospective clients away for awhile until room frees up in some of our schedules."
A look of concern crossed her face. "Well, I'm glad that didn't happen to Zechs," she said. "You don't *know* what a time we had of it, just getting him to go for an interview. I don't know what would have happened if he'd been turned away." She shuddered delicately.
"I'm glad that didn't happen either - then I wouldn't have gotten the chance to meet him - and *you* of course." He smiled at her again but she was shaking her head at him.
"Don't try to pretend you were happy to meet *me,*" she said, and then turned serious. "You *are* in love with my brother, aren't you?" she asked softly.
Treize was doing his best not to turn red. /Don't admit anything... / "I don't know about 'being in love' with him, but I do like him *very* much and I really want him to get better, so he can be happy again."
"So... you feel for him the same way you do for any patient?" she asked. "I don't believe you, doctor." Her tone was teasing, but underneath she meant what she said and Treize knew she was determined to get an answer.
"No, Relena, I don't see him the way I see my other patients... there *is* something special about him for me. But my job right now is to work with him so he can get back on his feet."
"And after that?" she said, head tilting to one side a bit.
"After that," Treize said slowly, "after that I would like to get to know him better - in a different kind of relationship." Try as he might, he couldn't stop himself from saying what he did next. "But I don't know how he feels, of course. That's not something we talk about. Has... has he said anything to you? About me, I mean?"
Relena's expression turned sympathetic and Treize felt his heart drop. "Sorry - not a word," she said. "But he doesn't tell me *everything* I'm sure." The look on her face was almost more than he could stand - half concern, half pity, and he wanted nothing more than to leave the house. /Stupid idiot. You're his *therapist* - he's never let on how he felt about you and that's no doubt because he doesn't see you as anything but a *therapist*! Get over it so you can keep helping him... Psychologist, eliminate thy own negative self-talk./
There was a knock at the door and Cathrine looked in. "Excuse me, Relena, but your brother just told me to let you know - he had to leave suddenly and won't be joining you for dinner after all."
Looking worried, Relena sat up higher in bed. "Is he all right? Why did he have to go?"
"He got a phone call from a neighbor. Something about a pregnant woman and early labor."
"Have they called an ambulance?" asked Treize, alarmed, for some reason, at the thought of Noin losing the baby.
"They have - it sounded as though the husband just needed an extra hand, so he called Zechs."
"Oh," said Relena, voice heavy with disappointment. "Well that's horrible, but I suppose it can't be helped."
"Dinner has also come - I have it out here on a tray. Shall I bring it in for the two of you?"
"Well, if Zechs isn't here," Treize said, standing, "perhaps I should -"
"Please stay," Relena said, looking up at him. "I'll be doing the paperwork myself for the rest of the evening probably and a nice dinner with some good conversation would be wonderful."
His spirits had sunk to zero, knowing that he wouldn't be seeing Zechs, but Relena had asked so longingly and the food Cathrine was bringing in smelled delicious, so he agreed and sat back down. When they had they plates full, Relena looked over at him and winked.
"Maybe it's *good* that Zechs couldn't be here - ever since he lived with Wufei he's been snobby about Chinese food. Always tells me now that the stuff we eat is gunk."
Treize laughed. "It probably *is,*" he said, "or at least it probably doesn't look or taste a thing like what real Chinese people eat." He took a bite and then added, "Tastes good to me, though."
"Thank you for saying that," Relena said, rolling her eyes. "Zechs would have disparaged *every* ingredient by now."
They ate in companionable silence for awhile and then Treize thought of something. "Relena," he said, "would you happen to know of any friend of Zechs's - a female friend - whose name began with an 'S'?"
Relena frowned in thought. "'S'? Let me think... I didn't hear about *all* the people he met at college, I'm sure, but... wait - there *was* one. Sylvia. Sylvia Noventa. I only remember her because she came with a group of them, one day when Zechs stopped by on his way to a concert at the Cow Palace. He had a couple of friends with him and they all came in for 20 minutes or so."
"Hmm," said Treize, trying to act casual. "Do you know if she and Zechs were... *more* than friends?"
Looking skeptical, the young woman in the bed frowned. "My brother didn't date girls as a rule, although he had a number of them as friends. She *was* hanging on him a bit that day, but he never mentioned anything *specific* about her." She made a face and then said, "Not that he *would* tell his kid sister anything. Why do you ask?
"Oh, it's just that Zechs gave me Wufei's diary to read and he mentions someone named 'S' - a woman, I think - and that she was rather fond of your brother."
"Well, I wouldn't be surprised if it was her," Relena said. "He had a lot of girls who liked him - thought he liked them, too. Then they got disappointed when they realized he didn't swing that way. Pardon the crude language."
"That's all right - it makes a lot of sense, given what Wufei wrote."
"What else did he say in the diary?" Relena asked, eyes bright.
"He just talked about what he did each day - what he felt for your brother, that kind of thing." He regarded her for a moment and then asked, "What did you think of him? Wufei I mean?"
She shrugged. "He was nice. Fairly easy to talk to, and *very* stuck on Zechs! But I suppose my brother had it bad for him, too"
"Does it bother you that Zechs is gay?" Treize asked.
"No, of course not," Relena answered. "I love him the way he is... wish I could say the same for my parents."
"They didn't take the news very well?"
"Hah - they completely exploded. Mother was snooping in Zechs's room one day and found a couple of sketches he'd made of nude men. You would have thought my brother had betrayed his country or something, they way those two carried on."
She let herself drop back against the pillows and sighed. "They were so hateful to him. Can you believe my father actually said he would disown him?"
"No!" Treize said, secretly aghast, "that's hard to believe. "I mean - a son is a son, isn't he?"
"Remember, Treize - they thought he was a total screw-up to begin with. Being gay was just icing on the cake."
"Yes, I can see how they might think that," Treize murmured.
"They were horrible to him. And the weird thing is that here *I* was, unable to walk more than a couple of feet without the braces, and they thought I was wonderful . All I got was praise and smiles - go figure that one out. Of course, they didn't go so far as to let me 'out' when company came over, but at least they acted like they *loved* me. I hated the way they treated Zechs. It was all so horribly unfair."
"It certainly sounds like it," Treize said sadly. "But I have to say, he's remarkably well adjusted for all that crap he had to take."
"Tough as nails," Relena nodded. "He doesn't give up easily."
/And yet... he *did* want to give up... wanted to *very* badly.../
He looked down at his plate and then at his watch. "I'm sorry to eat and run, but I have to meet an intern who's working with me. I'd better get going."
"Oh, don't worry about it," Relena said. "I'm sorry you missed Zechs. Thanks, though, for eating dinner with me."
"My pleasure," Treize said, giving her a little bow. "I can find my way out," he said, "so don't bother Cathrine." He walked to the door of the room and then turned, looking back on her. "I'm glad, at least," he said softly, "that he had you, Relena."
She smiled at him. "I'm glad he did, too."
End of Chapter 14
(:./kumiko/rr14)
