in collaboration with dana-chan
The sun streamed through the window, collecting in a pool around me. I stretched out comfortably, enjoying the pleasant feel of the sun against my skin. Man, this was the life...
Nothing but rest and relaxation here on in...
No, I, Duo, was officially off duty. The magical world could cast itself into oblivion, I was taking a nap. Now way was I budging for anything, man, beast or monster. And I mean that. Nap, nap nap, look at me napping-
Darn.
It's not as much fun to snooze in a pool of sun unless there is someone around to annoy. Like Wufei. He is so fun to tease. Its like he takes as a deadly insult the sight of someone having more fun than he is. Which of course is everybody.
Wufei is fun.
I stretch smugly, reflecting that it is at least another hour before the dark-haired warlock is let out of his potions class.
Heh.
I bet he's having a hell of a time.
He'd have to be. After all, someone very unkindly switched all the nightshade leaves in his potion kit with oregano.
Well, come on! I was bored. What did you expect me to do, leave him alone and find something constructive to occupy me?
You must not know me very well. I smirk, happily reflecting on the evil that is me. That's when Quatre shows up.
He's humming. I stretch and sit up, watching as my best friend spins around the room. Someone's in a good mood...
"Date with Trowa?" I guessed.
"Mmhmm," Quatre said, picking me up and kissing me on the top of my head before twirling me around the room. "If you could see me now-if I could open your eyes-"
Someone's been watching Sleeping Beauty again. "Quatre-put me down! I wasn't made to be spun around like this!"
"Sorry-I forgot you get motion sickness," Quatre stopped spinning but didn't put me down. Instead, hugging me tightly, he said, "Duo, you're my best friend and I love you. Did I ever tell you that?"
"Possibly," I said. "I tend to ignore you when you get mushy."
"You," Quatre gave me another squeeze and then let me go. I landed on my feet (of course) and I stalked after him as he checked his reflection in the mirror happily.
"Mirror mirror on the wall, how do I look?"
The surface of the mirror twisted then formed into Heero's stoic features.
"What?"
"How do I look?" Quatre gestured. "Am I all ready for my date with Trowa?"
Heero stared at him. "That should be the least of your worries. For instance-"
A car beeped outside. "Eeeee, Trowa!" Quatre squealed. "Got to go! Duo, Wufei's going to feed you and there's a bowl of milk in the pantry."
"Have fun!"
The door closed behind him. Heero said "He won't."
I looked at Heero. "How do you know that?"
Heero looked at me.
"Oh," I said. "Silly me."
"By the way," Heero suggested. "You will probably want to find a hiding place. After all, Wufei is going to be coming home."
"Not a problem," I said. "Who's going to tell him I've been mucking around with his potions kit?"
Heero looked at me. I looked at Heero. I swallowed.
"See you."
Today is going to be the best day of my life. I just know it is!
Because it's been perfect. I passed my Finesse in Spell Casting test with a perfect score, and Divinations went perfectly. In Herbology I got top score, and...
And I have my date with Trowa!
It's going to be perfect.
I spin around. On a random tangent (because it takes too long to get to the front), most students don't get why I have to wear the witches' uniform (when I'm actually in uniform, that is). I blame it on my sisters; the school thought they were getting a girl... And then they got me.
Oh well, I can deal with it.
I just hope that Duo doesn't annoy Wufei *too* much... I know how my roommate can get when it comes to my cat's antics. But Duo is my best (cat) friend and he's the best familiar that I could ever ask for.
And Trowa is the best boyfriend... ever...
I sigh again and hum as I skip towards outside. "Trowa!"
He smiled his non-smile and the door was opened. "I'm so happy to see you!"
He grunted. His quiet streak was very cute.
"So, where are we going to go, you never told me?" I asked him, as we drove off. It would be nice if he asked me out to the ball tonight... it's the biggest function of the year, and if you don't go then you're blacklisted to the entire school!
I snuggled close to him as he drove. Perfect, Quatre. This is going to be perfect...
And it is. We had a perfect date. Dinner was great, the movie was divine, though it was rather weird when he made me pay. I suppose he must have forgotten his wallet... Could I possibly use the word perfect anymore in one sitting? I don't think so...
"Are we going to get in some choice snuggling time tonight?" I asked. "Duo and Wufei can keep each other occupied... I'm sure they won't kill each other."
"Actually, we're going to have to have an early night. I have tests tomorrow..."
"Oh." I pouted. "Are you... sure... ?"
He nodded. "Very."
"Oh." I sighed. This is certainly strange...
He stopped to let me out so he could go and park, "Aren't you going to walk me in?" I asked expectantly.
"Oh, sure."
"Trowa... is something wrong? You're acting awfully moody... "
He doesn't reply to me, and puts the car in park. "Come on, let's get this over with."
I cringe. "Trowa... "
At least I can look forward to my good night kiss. I wait for it expectantly, once we reach the front doors... and then blink, as Trowa's not putting out.
"Trowa... "
He thrusts a folded piece of parchment my way, "This will explain everything. It was nice while it lasted, Quatre."
"Um... Trowa... I... thanks... um... the ball... " I'm very confused, and I watch him walk back to his car.
I sigh and look down at the parchment, folding it apart to read.
And I couldn't believe what I was reading.
I don't think I've ever felt so used in my life... of course, I started crying and ran back towards my room.
"Stand still you confounded furball and learn the true meaning of fear!"
"Not likely!" I ran down the hall, in the opposite direction from the sword wielding maniac Quatre decided to room flat with. Who knew Wufei had so little a sense of humour?
Heero blinked as I shot past him. "I wouldn't go into the kitchen if I were you-"
"Huh?" I said as I zipped past him. My one chance was getting to the cat flap before Wufei-suddenly I found myself scrabbling as my paws slid of their own volition. I couldn't stop-motion spell? I thought as the wall loomed closer and closer. Maybe it was one of those loco-kinetic whatever charms-
"The floor's been waxed," Heero said flatly as I connected with the wall.
Hard.
"Now you tell me," I said as the kitchen danced and spun around me. I stood up shakily, trying to work out why there was suddenly two of everything-two tables, two cat flaps, two Wufei-
Two Wufei?
I let out a strangled yelp and made a frantic dive for the cat-flap-only to be plucked out of mid air by a levitation spell.
"Put me down!" I yowled.
"I think not! You must be punished for your transgressions, you impudent furball!" Wufei said, walking over to me deliberately slowly and taking me by the scruff of my neck.
I whined and tried to squirm away.
"I told you that was a bad idea," Heero said from his place on the wall.
"Let me go!"
"Not on your nine lives, Duo!" Wufei told me. "We're going to go upstairs and find out just how effective an imploding spell is when used on a cat-"
"Don't you dare! Quatre will kill you!"
Wufei shrugged. "So I'll just find another annoying talking black cat-"
The kitchen door shot open, a blonde blur went past at high speed and then a door slammed.
We blinked at each other. "Was that-"
"Quatre?" Wufei finished.
"It was Quatre," Heero confirmed.
With that knowledge I suddenly twisted, digging my claws into Wufei's hand. He cursed and let go. I immediately made for Quatre's room.
"Oi! Quatre! Save me!" I called, scratching at the door. "Wufei's going to implode me!"
"Winner!" Wufei thundered, catching up to us. "Train that pest of yours! You will not believe the trouble he has caused."
There was a muffled response from the other side of the door.
"That's fine. You guys tidy up after yourselves, huh?"
Wufei and I looked at each other. Something was seriously wrong.
"What happened to him?" I asked.
Heero appeared in the reflection of the hall picture. "Trowa just dumped him."
"Why that good for nothing-" Wufei ranted. "Wait till I have a word with him-"
"Open the door for me," I hissed.
"But-" Wufei paused mid-rant.
"Please, Wufei? Quatre needs me. And I can't reach the door handle."
Wufei nodded, opening the door and I slipped inside, pading noiselessly across the floor to the bed. Just as I feared, Quatre was sobbing hard out, tears streaming down his face.
"Hey, Quatre," I said, jumping up onto the bed beside him. "What's the matter?" I patted his cheek with my paw.
"T-t-t-tro-wa-a b-b-broke up w-wi-with meeeeee!" Quatre choked. "I don't want to talk about it!"
"It's okay," I told him. "It'll be all right." I licked at his cheek with my tongue, trying to get rid of the salty streaks I found there.
After a moment he stopped sobbing to say, "That tickles."
"So?"
"You've got a really rough tongue."
"I don't have that many options," I told him, batting him in the face with my tail. "I can't use this without choking you, and well I don't wear clothes so I've got no pockets to keep handkerchiefs in-"
Quatre hugged me. "You do just fine."
I didn't mind that he was holding me rather tightly. "If you need anything, I'm here."
"Just keep me company, Duo."
Well, you know what they say. All you really need are your friends... Duo is better than Trowa. Sure, he's a cat... but he's my best friend and... I don't need Trowa...
Really... really...
"Aw, Quatre, don't start crying again."
I sniffle and he licks my cheek again. "That really does tickle..." I laugh weakly.
"It's what I do."
I continue holding onto him.
"Well, are you going to tell me what happened?"
"Gee, Duo, I know what they say about cats and curiosity, but couldn't you use a little tact?" I demand, sniffling. "Anyway, I already told you I don't want to talk about it."
"But how can I help if you don't give me a chance!" he pleads.
"Oh. All right. How can I resist that look?"
"You can't, that's the point."
I laugh. "You're evil, you know that."
"But I care so it makes up for it."
"You're right... it does..."
I sigh, and close my eyes. "Well," he urges, licking my cheek to elicit another giggle. "Aren't you going to tell me?"
"Do I have to?"
"Yes. It's for your own best interests."
"And what if I don't?"
"Well..." I open my eyes and he's flexing claws. "Just trust me. I know what I'm doing."
I sigh. "Oh all right. We went out like normal and then... well, it wasn't normal at the end. He wasn't acting like himself and..." I sigh again.
"Hmm... maybe that harpy got her talons into him."
"Duo! That's no way to speak about Relena. I'm sure she's a... very nice... lady..."
Duo snickered. "Yeah, right."
"Um, really!" Why do I not sound like I believe myself?
And why is Duo still laughing...?
"Come on, it's not that funny!"
"Yes, it is." He replies.
"No, it's not."
"Yes, it is!"
"No, it's..."
"You're smiling!"
"Um... am not!"
Duo laughs again and squirms out of my hold, to turn around and sit down on the bed to look up at me. "You don't seem to believe yourself, Quatre. This could be a problem..."
"Well, I'll deal with it." I reply. How can he be so annoying... and yet so completely right?
"So, where were we?" he asks, licking his paw.
"Um, well..."
"I think Trowa wasn't acting like himself?"
"Oh! That's right... and he brought me home and he just dumped me off and then he gave me this note and... it completely lacked in sincerity and... oh, I'm so mad at him!"
Duo blinks. "I think that's called a mood swing."
I nosed the note open then gave it a brief look.
Trowa's perfunctuory handwriting, and a short brusque message-it seemed perfectly in keeping with Trowa to me, but to tell the truth I never much liked him. Call it a cat thing.
"Just wait until I get my claws into him," I muttered. "Writing you a note! He should have at least told you nicely-"
Not just written 'I'm going to the Ball with Relena. I don't want to go out with you any more.' What, me reading?
Well of course, cats can read. Duh. How do you think we choose what magazines we fall asleep on? Quatre sniffled again and I batted my head against his chin.
"It'll be all right. Forget that idiot. Just because he can't appreciate you doesn't mean you have to feel sad."
"But I do," Quatre says, wiping tears away.
"Well then, me and Wufei will plot something nice and evil to do to Trowa. Maybe I can sneak into his next class and sabotage his spells... "
My human managed a weak smile. "But you do that anyway Duo."
"True," I admitted. "I'll just have to think of something extra specially wicked."
"That shouldn't be a problem for you," Quatre sat up, wiping at his face with his sleeve.
I ran over to the bedroom door, knocked it open with my head and slipped through, returning with a flannel care of a levitation spell. "Here."
"Thanks Duo," Quatre accepted it. "I do feel a bit better now."
"Well stay here. I've got something that will make you feel a ton better."
I slipped out of the room again, and made my way down to the kitchen where Wufei was sitting at the table polishing his swords and Heero was looking grim in the shiny surface of the oven door.
"How is he?" Wufei asked.
"I've got the situation under control," I told him and he was visibly relieved-Nothing panics Wufei more than emotions. The guy has no concept of them at all, any more than he has a sense of humour. Of course, I would say that but then I happen to find sharpening my claws on Nataku (Wufei's prize mahogony broomstick) hilarious.
"All I need is for you to bring a couple of things. Nightshade, quantities of the foulest fungus you can find, enough basic harm ingredients for a decent curse and two large tubs of ice-cream. Chocolate if you can get it."
"Ice-cream?" Wufei said frowning at me.
"Widely recognised cure for a dissolved relationship," Heero explained. "The cat is not as dumb as he looks."
"Hey thank-you Hee-chan, nice to know you have some confidence in-hang on-"
"Duo?" Quatre called.
Ignoring the others I shot back up the stairs. I'd just have to wait until later to take this up with Heero.
"You know," Quatre was looking at himself in the mirror. "Why do you think he dumped me? I mean, I thought everything was fine... and why Relena? What's she got that I haven't?"
There was a pause as we thought about that.
"Well besides the obvious," my human said.
"A couple of warts and a very serious cold," I answered.
"What do you mean?" Quatre looked at me. "I saw her today and she was fine. Kind of obnoxious and screechy, but fine."
"She won't be," I said climbing back onto his lap. "After we get through with her."
Cats are supposed to be vindictive. Don't look at me like that.
I laughed and petted him. "I don't know what you're talking about, Duo."
"You're not supposed to," he replied in a contented tone. Let's hope he doesn't feel the need to kneed...
I sigh and shake my head. "I just don't know why this happened. It was all alright... and now..."
"You're going to be all right, Quatre. I mean, I'm here!"
I laugh again and pull him up to hug him. "And you're the best. Thanks, Duo."
"Well, you don't have to thank me yet. Just wait and see what they're going to get... "
"Someone has to be on my side, I guess."
"Oh! And don't forget Wufei. He could be useful as well, of course."
I smile, "Of course... "
I lay back on my bed and stare up the ceiling, Duo stretching out on my chest. "I wish I could show him... that he can't just... "
I continue to pet him and he starts to purr. "Oh, Quatre, you're being silly... he'll get his just desserts... you just wait and see."
"But... he's still the one with a date, Duo. Who would ever go out with me? I doubt Wufei would leap at the chance, Duo!"
"Well, we could ask... wait, he probably would just be a bore all evening long." A pause. "Is that what you want?"
"Well, I mean, otherwise I'm just a loser who can't get a date... and well so sure I want to show him up about that... but really, who would ever date *me*?"
And it would be nice to get an answer.
Trowa has a lot to answer for.
"Quatre, you're a wonderful tom. I seriously don't know why you don't have queens lining up outside the door."
"Um... thanks... I think."
"You're welcome!" I butt him affectionately. "Now relax. Wufei and I will make sure you have the perfect Ball night."
"You mean that?" He stares at me, his blue eyes wavering. "You'd do that for me?"
"Duh."
"Oh Duo," he hugs me, almost choking me. "You're the best familiar ever!"
"I know," I said smugly. "Now let me go before I suffocate, okay?"
"Sorry." He puts me down and I make my way back downstairs to find Wufei coming back in with some full shopping bags.
"I have everything you need, Duo," he said. "Although I have to say, the ice-cream gave me a lot of trouble. I had to go to a supermarket like an onna!"
"I bet you looked really cute pushing the shopping trolley around."
"If you kill him now you'll have to cheer Quatre up on your own," Heero interposed, just in time.
Wufei let me live.
"Let's see we've got the warts and cold for the harpie, now for Trowa," I snickered maliciously. "Let's make his hair all stick together."
"You already did that."
"Oh yeah. Darn." I flicked my tail as I thought. "How about... " I cackled.
"What?" Wufei asked nervously.
"Well, humans don't really need eyebrows, do you?"
It was quite a bit later. Wufei and I rang the doorbell to Trowa's house then ran and hid.
"If it didn't work, what will we do?" Wufei hissed as we waited.
"Think of something else," I said unperturbed.
"By the way Wufei-"
Trowa's door slammed open. He glared at the apparently empty surroundings then slammed the door again.
Wufei and I climbed out of the bush silently and went back down the road. Only when we were a safe distance away did we collapse into laughter.
"Duo, that was amazing. I'll admit you do have some good points."
"That means a lot to me Wu-baby. Now we just have to find Quatre a date for the ball... " I let that trail off suggestively. "Are you free?"
Wufei choked.
And continued to choke.
I sighed and began to wash myself as I waited.
A good ten minutes later Wufei's breathing was under control again.
"You cannot be serious! Do I look like an onna?"
"Yes."
He spluttered. I waggled a paw at him.
"Girly pony tail Wu-man."
"You cat! You have no idea-" He went off on a rant. After several minutes, he stopped and said, "anyway, I have a date."
My turn to splutter.
"What? When did that happen?"
"Yesterday," Wufei said embarrassed.
"How did that happen?"
"I bumped into Meiran and she said that since technically we were married it was only justice that I escort her to the ball."
"But she's dead!"
"A ghost," Wufei admitted. "But she can still hit hard."
I pulled my claws back in. "This is most inconvenient."
End Part One
(:./starfish/spell1)
