Title: Empty
Author: tkmaxwell777
Category: Shonen Ai/Yaoi
Pairing: 2x2/1x2x1
Disclaimers: All those Japanese people own Gundam Wing... but Duo and Heero made me to write this.
Rating: NC17
Warnings: Lemon, Masturbation, Heero may be slightly OOC
Synopsis: Heero walks in on Duo and discovers how much the braided boy cares about him.

Empty by tkmaxwell777

Duo lay on his bed thinking about Heero; it was his favorite pastime. Well, actually, looking at Heero was his favorite pastime, but thinking about the other boy was a close second. In the past six months that they'd been partners, he had noticed that the attraction he had dismissed during the war had now grown into a blatant desire. Once again, they were rooming together at a school undercover, and Duo didn't know how much longer he would be able to hide his arousal when Heero was around him for too long. It was getting more difficult to find time to release his tensions because they had almost the same schedule, and the only time Heero wasn't in their room was when he was at class. Duo had managed to get an hour of free time while Heero had his last class of the day, and Duo spent that time wisely... every day of the school week. Weekends were hell; that's why Mondays were normally the days he spent his time the most wisely.

Today was Monday, but Duo found himself hesitating to relieve the pent up desire brought on first thing that morning from seeing Heero walk in after his shower. Heero's bare chest was enough to make Duo stare, but Heero seemed to have this perverse delight in dropping his towel as soon as he shut the door. Duo could barely think of anything else the rest of the day, especially since Heero was in most of his classes, which made Duo have to look at him. He had known that he would have no choice but to touch himself once he got back to their room since it was the only time he would have alone. The only problem was that lately it didn't seem to really help him.

Oh sure, it made his body feel better, but his emotions still longed for the kind of release that only an experience with the person he cared about would bring. He knew that. As much as he wanted to deny it, he knew it was something he had to face. The truth was that he loved Heero. It wasn't just about the sex, although that was something he wanted too, Heaven help him. Loving the wing pilot scared him, but he knew he had no choice in the matter; his heart had decided his fate before he'd even known what had happened.

"I've got to do this or I won't even be able to stand up when he gets back," Duo told himself out loud, trying to make himself forget that he needed more. If nothing else, his body would be satisfied.

Duo unzipped his pants then reached into his boxers, trying to bring the image of Heero standing naked in front of him that morning to his mind as he touched himself. He fantasized that the other boy was leaning over him, his eyes burning with passion instead of the ever-present indifference. He quickly pulled both articles of clothing down past his knees then slowly began stroking himself, pretending it was Heero's hand on him instead of his own.

"Oh, yes! Please, Heero. Please!" Duo moaned as he touched himself, unable to keep the words inside no matter how hard he tried. His hand moved tantalizingly over his erection.

"Oh, Heero, you don't know how much I need you to touch me like this," Duo said, too lost in his fantasy to even care that he was carrying on a conversation out loud with the envisioned object of his affection.

"You're everything to me, Heero. I've never wanted anyone the way I want you. Never."

"Heero! Heero! Oh, yes! Aishiteru!" Duo climaxed as he uttered those last words. Waves of pleasure coursed through him as he surrendered to the feeling. He regained his composure only to find that he was chocking back sobs of emptiness instead of fulfillment. The fantasy had left him again... alone.

"Heero," he cried, tears wracking his body as he lay there, spent but not sated. "Do you know how I wish I could hear those words from you? Do you know how much I want to be able to say them to you? No matter how hard I try, I can't help but need you. It means nothing unless you're the one touching me... nothing."

He didn't hear the door to their room shut softly.

Heero had skipped class. There was no way to excuse it, but he knew something was going on with Duo, and he wasn't about to let it go for another day. He was headed back to their room to talk with the braided pilot to find out what was wrong. It had been so subtle at first; he had almost missed it completely. That morning had finally made him realize the change he had been sensing the last couple of weeks.

He'd come back from his shower as usual, but when he'd walked into the room, instead of Duo mumbling some normal stupid comment he was famous for, he had just watched Heero... silently, trying to not let Heero know he was doing it. Heero had tried to ignore the covert glances then recalled that they were becoming more common than words. Duo had always talked like it was breathing, but the boy had suddenly begun to be... quiet. It bothered Heero; he'd actually gotten used to the other boy's chatter.

Now the silence was making him uncomfortable, and he didn't like it.

What bothered him even more was the fact that Duo had stopped touching him in the friendly way he had grown accustomed to. Heero had never known anyone else who would place his arm around him as he typed on the computer, or lean against him after telling a joke, or reach out to him physically in all the other countless ways Duo did. It had been annoying at first, even frightening for someone like Heero who didn't know how to respond to such casual contact. Over the past few months, he had allowed himself to accept Duo's over-exuberant displays of friendship. Now, it was like the other boy was afraid to even get near him, and Heero felt kind of lost without Duo being close to him. Duo didn't act any differently while they were actually in the midst of a mission, so Heero was confused as to why he was acting this way during their down time.

Heero didn't want to admit it to himself, but he needed those friendly reminders of humanity that Duo gave so easily. Duo had found ways to penetrate the walls Heero had built around his emotions. Heero was actually beginning to understand what being a friend meant, even though he was still having difficulty expressing it. Obviously, something had happened, and Duo was either very pissed at him or very hurt. Heero had discovered that the pilot who claimed to be Shinigami was actually quite tenderhearted. Heero knew he would have to apologize for whatever he had done and hope that Duo would forget about it and continue to be his friend. He missed all of the ways Duo let him know that he liked being around him. He just hoped he could find a way to make things like they were before whatever happened had taken place.

Heero took a deep breath as he approached the door to their room... then froze. He heard Duo cry out, but it wasn't in a way he'd ever heard before. As he got nearer, he heard Duo yell his name... in passion? Why did that seem to fit the sound? For some reason, Heero knew he couldn't just barge into the room to find out; instead, he carefully opened the door enough so he could look inside.

The sight that met him was a complete shock... Duo laying on his bed, pants and boxers down, touching himself in a definitely sexual way. Heero had seen Duo in the shower before, so the other boy's naked body wasn't what made him lean against the doorframe outside for support. The very picture Duo presented, unbridled as he pleasured himself, was what took Heero's breath away. He soon realized that Duo was actually talking while touching. 'Two things I desperately need for him to do for me,' Heero thought idly, not realizing the implications of his thoughts.

"Oh, Heero, you don't know how much I need you to touch me like this."

Heero somehow knew that Duo didn't know he was actually there. It seemed like Duo was speaking to someone with him on the bed, but no one else was there. 'He must be fantasizing, but why would he be fantasizing about me?' Duo seemed to be reading his mind.

"You're everything to me, Heero. Everything. I've never wanted anyone the way I want you. Never."

Heero couldn't believe his own ears. He stood there, watching as Duo began stroking himself even harder, raising his hips off the bed, thrusting into his own hand as if someone else were setting the rhythm. Heero felt himself begin to get aroused just seeing Duo like this. His own need filtered through to his brain just as his hand rubbed against the swell in his pants.

"Heero! Heero! Oh, yes! Aishiteru!" Duo climaxed as he uttered those last words. Heero saw Duo's seed release in pulse after pulse of pleasure, but he stopped touching himself as Duo's words reached him, shocking him beyond belief. Duo loved him? When he heard Duo begin to sob, Heero was even more confused, but he didn't know what to do.

"Heero," Duo cried, tears wracking his body as he lay there. "Do you know how I wish I could hear those words from you? Do you know how much I want to be able to say them to you? No matter how hard I try, I can't help but need you. It means nothing unless you're the one touching me... nothing."

Heero did the only thing he could; he softly shut the door... and left.

He made his way across campus. Where he was going, he didn't know. The whole scene played out in his mind over and over as he tried to come to terms with the reality of what he'd just seen and heard. It was one thing for Duo to be physically attracted to him; that wasn't as much of a shock as it should have been. What Heero couldn't fathom was why Duo would love him. Why?

'How could he even think he loves me?' Heero thought as he looked for a place to go where he could reason all this out. He spied the coffee shop on the corner and headed that way. 'I mean I know we've been through a lot, but that doesn't mean that he loves me, especially that way.'

Heero entered the coffee shop, chose a booth in the back, and ordered strong black coffee before he allowed himself to continue to sort out what he was feeling. It wasn't that he didn't care for Duo; he did. He just didn't know how much. 'Is it possible I feel the same for him, but I don't know that it's love?'

Heero thought about all the times he had felt something for the other boy in his heart that he didn't understand; like when Duo brushed his long hair in front of Heero at night, or when Duo smiled a knowing smile at him, or when Duo just lost himself in something he was reading so that his expression was completely unaware. All of those things seemed to make Heero's heart feel... warmer?

"Do I care enough about him to give him more than friendship even if I don't know how?" Heero asked himself out loud. That was the real issue. Could he give something he didn't even understand? He had felt the soft glow of friendship; maybe the flames of love weren't as far away as he tried to pretend. Maybe all he needed was to spend more time with Duo. If something were there, then maybe it would progress naturally. Heero had never thought about being involved with anyone, let alone another guy, but as he thought about it, it didn't seem odd to him. Duo wasn't just a guy; he was his friend. If he were going to be involved with anyone, he'd want him to be his friend, right?

Heero looked at his watch and swore softly. He was an hour late. Duo would be worried about him. He paid the bill, then left. He would try to be friendlier tonight and see if he could get Duo to respond. He had no other choice. He had to find a way to help his friend... even if it meant becoming his lover.

Duo paced the room. When Heero hadn't showed up on time, he'd been worried. When a half hour went by, he'd become panicked. Now an hour after Heero should have been there, Duo was livid. He tried to calm himself down, telling himself that Heero may have had to stay after class, but Duo knew better. Something was going on, and he was hell bent on finding out what. When the door opened and Heero walked in, Duo stalked over to him before he even allowed him time to explain.

"Where the hell have you been, Yuy?" he yelled, using Heero's last name, which was always a bad sign.

Heero recognized it immediately. 'He's really pissed. Okay, I just need to be calm.'

"Don't stand there staring at me like I'm an idiot, you cold-hearted bastard! Where have you been?"

Heero flinched. "I skipped my last class today and went to the coffee shop. I lost track of time."

"You what?" Duo asked incredulously then continued before Heero could repeat himself, "You mean to tell me I've been worried out of my damn mind about you and you were sitting in a damn coffee shop, drinking damn coffee?"

"Why would you be worried about me? I can take care of myself, Duo. I don't need anyone to do it for me."

"Oh, sure. So if Billy Siler decided to corner you with a few of his buddies to make good on that note he passed you second period, you'd be able to handle it, right? For all I knew, you could have been lying in a field somewhere bleeding to death!"

Heero could see that Duo was closely approaching a loss of control. He needed to get him to calm down.

"I'm sorry, Duo. I didn't mean to make you worry. I just needed some time alone, and I didn't realize what time it was until it was too late." Heero didn't know what the words 'time alone' meant to Duo. The other boy's mind recalled the past two horrible hours in complete detail in a matter of seconds, feeding his anger.

"Well, you sure as hell could have stopped by here to tell me!" Duo spat, rage blazing in his violet eyes.

Heero was having a hard time reconciling the person standing in front of him with the person he'd seen less than two hours ago sobbing on his bed alone. He had already said he was sorry, but Duo wasn't listening. He felt his own anger take over.

"I did stop by here, but you were a little too busy to notice. Next time you should hang a little sign outside to let me know you're jacking off. I can then write a nice note telling you where I'm going so you can find me when you're done."

Duo froze at those words. Heero had walked in on him. Duo's breath caught in his throat as he realized that Heero had probably stayed away to give him some time to get himself pulled together, which could only mean that Heero had watched the whole thing, including Duo crying afterward. The fact that Duo had been talking out loud 'to' Heero made it even worse. Heero now knew how Duo felt about him.

"How could you stand there and watch, then just walk away? You really don't give a damn about me do you? It wouldn't matter if I died tomorrow, would it? You'd just be pissed because it might interfere with your precious missions. You are such a bastard!" Duo shoved Heero, knocking him away from the door.

Before Heero could say or do anything, Duo flew out the door. Heero knew where he was going. He swore softly to himself again and walked out the door after him.

Duo felt the tears streak his face as his feet hit the pavement. He would go somewhere, curl up into a little ball, and just die. That was his plan. He would just let the cold night take him then he wouldn't have to face the pain anymore. He had been so glad when he and Heero had become partners, so optimistic about their relationship, so sure that Heero would learn to put aside the "Perfect Soldier" and just be Heero; he had been wrong. Every day, it had grown more difficult to maintain his friendly disposition when inside all he wanted was to be held by those strong arms, kissed by those hard lips, loved by that cold heart. Duo should have known better.

Duo made his way to the park. There was a group of trees that created a small alcove of sorts. Duo could stay there without anyone seeing him. Maybe he would freeze to death during the night. It wasn't that cold really; it was just something to make him feel better so he didn't have to think about what he'd really have to do in the morning... face Heero. Duo found the spot he wanted and carefully rolled himself under the copse of branches. Huddling alone, he began crying again. Why did he have to love Heero? Why couldn't he just have been Heero's friend? It wasn't fair. Duo would have laughed at that thought if he hadn't been sobbing. Nothing in life was fair. That thought just made him feel worse, but he couldn't help it. He just lay there crying his heart out, wishing that someone would put him out of his misery. He heard someone approaching his hiding place, and wondered if that might become a reality. It didn't matter. If they wanted to hurt him, he'd let them. He didn't have any fight left in him. He felt someone scoot in beside him. He didn't even struggle when that person rolled him into their arms; instead, he just lay there. He didn't care. He was empty.

The trees had almost blocked Duo from Heero's view. He heard the ragged sobs coming from under the branches, so he pushed his way through until he was beside the other boy. Duo was crying so hard he didn't seem to be aware of his surroundings anymore. Heero pulled his friend against him, trying to comfort him in the limited way he knew how. All he could think about was the hurt he had caused Duo. He had meant to explore their relationship gradually, but now he had to make a choice; he either had to offer love to Duo or walk away. Walking away was not an option. He already knew that he cared about Duo so loving him wouldn't be that hard to do; in fact, he thought that he might love Duo already anyway. Why else would he be holding him in the cold under a bunch of trees if he didn't?

Duo's tears finally ended. He lay there for a moment before he realized that someone was just holding him. He slowly pulled away to stare into sad cobalt blue eyes... sad, not indifferent. Somehow that made him feel better. He searched Heero's eyes again, still trying to understand why he had followed him and why he had stayed with him. He had no answers.

Heero saw the questions in Duo's violet depths. He could see all the pain and anguish in those beautiful eyes, and what made it worse was that he was responsible for it. He wasn't good with words, but he knew he had to try to tell Duo how he felt. "If you die, a part of me dies with you, Duo. You're the only person strong enough to love me. I never knew it was love that I saw it in your eyes. I don't even know how to love, but I'll try if you'll let me. I want to love you, but I don't know what to do. Please... show me."

Duo just stared at him, unable to move or speak. He watched as Heero tentatively moved his face closer until he brushed his lips against Duo's. It was a tender kiss that promised everything Duo had ever wanted. Heero's mouth moved over his slowly, and Duo savored the feel of the other boy's lips. He put his arms around Heero, pulling his closer, wanting to drown in the sensation of the wing pilot's body against him.

It had begun as a comforting kind of kiss. Before Heero even realized it, it turned into a kiss of pure desire. Duo moaned, and Heero took advantage of Duo's parted lips to plunge his tongue into Duo's mouth to taste him. He didn't know what he was doing, only that it felt incredible and that he planned on continuing to do it for as long as possible. Neither one knew how long it lasted. Finally, they had to break for air.

"Duo, why don't we go back to the room? There's a bed there, you know?"

Duo smiled his first real smile that day. "There are two beds there actually," he teased.

Heero growled as he rolled over on top of Duo, pinning him underneath. "Don't get smart with me, Maxwell. There's only one bed there as far as I'm concerned... ours." Heero's face reddened slightly as he wondered what was happening to him. He had never felt like this before.

Duo laughed, delighted at Heero's forcefulness and embarrassment. "Then let's go. I'd much rather be in a warm bed with you than under these trees in the cold." They moved out from underneath the trees. Heero reached out his hand and Duo took it. It was symbolic in so many ways.

They walked back to the dorm room, holding hands until they reached the complex. Once inside the room, they stared at each other, both suddenly unsure, until Heero stalked over to Duo and claimed his lips again in a searing kiss.

Duo pulled away a couple minutes later. "Are you sure you want to do this, Heero? I don't want you to just because you feel sorry for me." He wanted to give Heero every opportunity to back out before it was too late.

Heero smirked as he pressed against Duo. "Doesn't this feel like I'm sure?" Heero's erection was firm against Duo's thigh. Duo moaned in response and began devouring Heero's mouth again.

They took turns pulling each other's clothes off until they stood naked in front of each other. Heero pulled Duo's hair loose to let it flow around him. He ran his fingers through it, reveling in the silky softness. 'This is going to feel so good against my skin,' he thought as he looked into Duo's eyes.

"Duo, you're incredible," Heero breathed.

"You're not so bad yourself. When I called you the 'perfect soldier', I wasn't just talking about your battle skills, you know." Duo smiled as his gaze moved down Heero's body to his throbbing erection.

Heero's face turned red again, gaining another laugh from Duo as he pulled him over to his bed, kissing him along the way. By the time they slid under the covers, both boys were even harder. They faced each other, and Duo ran his fingers over Heero's cheek, smiling when Heero nipped at them with his mouth.

"What do you want to do, Heero?"

Heero moved closer to his 'friend'. "I want whatever you want, Duo. Tell me what to do. I want to make you feel good."

Duo closed his eyes as he let the words trace themselves into his heart. "Then I want you to take me, Heero."

"Okay," Heero said softly. After a few seconds went by, he added, "How exactly do I do that?" He heard Duo chuckle and flushed at his own ignorance. Duo thought that he'd never seen Heero more attractive than he was at that moment.

He leaned forward and kissed Heero gently on the lips, whispering soft words to let him know how much it pleased him that he didn't know what to do. He finally looked deeply into Heero's eyes as he said, "I'll show you, koi." It felt so good to be able to say those words.

Duo covered Heero's mouth with his own as he slid his fingers down Heero's chest. Heero moaned when Duo traced over his taut nipples. When Duo's mouth left Heero's and followed where his fingers left off, Heero felt pleasure course through him like electricity. He thought that was amazing, but nothing could prepare him for when Duo touched his arousal. Heero arched off the bed.

"Duo! Oh yes!" It was so different from touching himself. Now he understood what Duo had meant about it meaning nothing if it wasn't him touching Duo; he would feel the same way.

Duo continued his ministrations, gaining several more outbursts from the wing pilot. He continued to lick his way down Heero's chest to his stomach. He paused as his mouth reached Heero's erection. "Heero, look at me. I want you to see me taste you."

Heero groaned as he watched Duo flick out his tongue, swiping his tip in short quick strokes. He had to close his eyes before the very sight of Duo doing it made him come. The feeling alone was almost more than he could take. He moaned as Duo continued to lick and suckle his erection.

Duo reached into his nightstand and pulled out a tube of lubrication. 'Didn't think I'd actually get to use this. Thank goodness I didn't listen to my more practical side.' Duo slowly began preparing Heero. His finger penetrated Heero's tight entrance for the first time, bringing a moan from the other boy. Soon he'd added another digit, pushing them inside Heero as he stretched him. By the time he inserted the third, Heero was thrusting back against him, crying out every time Duo touched that certain place inside him. Duo withdrew his fingers hearing a whimper of disapproval from his lover. He knew that feeling of emptiness. 'I won't let you feel it for long, Heero. I promise.'

"Are you ready?" Duo asked as he quickly positioned himself between Heero's legs.

Heero nodded, his eyes bright with passion. "Yes. Please, yes. I need you inside me."

Duo smiled then moaned as he entered him. Heero felt incredible. His tightness enveloped Duo's erection, pleasure overwhelming him. He tried to allow Heero time to adjust to him, but Heero was soon thrusting against him. "Move, Duo. Please." Duo laughed at the urgency in his voice.

Pulling out almost all the way, Duo plunged back inside Heero. Heero let out a shout of pleasure only matched by Duo's as they shared the moment. Duo began thrusting in and out slowly at first, then faster and harder as Heero cried out for more.

"Duo! Harder. Harder. Don't stop until the bed collapses!"

Duo laughed at the other boy's choice of words, but agreed with them. Nothing short of the bed collapsing could make him stop. He built up a rhythm, but Heero's tightness was beginning to overtake him. He was getting close and knew Heero wouldn't last much longer.

"Heero, you feel so good. I don't think I can take much more," Duo said, his voice raspy from his passionate cries.

Heero moaned in response, "If it gets any better, Duo, I think I'll die."

"Then get ready, Heero, 'cause I'm about to take you to the other side."

Duo reached for Heero's erection and began pumping it in time with his thrusts. Heero was being stroked on the outside and pounded on the inside. He felt his control slipping away. As Duo pumped him and filled him, Heero looked up into his eyes, seeing the passion and love there, knowing that if he did die, he would die happy. Duo gave him a mischievous grin as he angled the thrust to hit Heero's sweet spot one more time. It was all it took to send him over the edge.

"Duo... I'm... Oh my... Ahhh!" Heero climaxed, spilling his seed between them as waves of pure bliss rushed over him. He wasn't aware of anything but the pleasure Duo had given him as it continued to roll like an endless tide. He felt Duo tense and scream his name as the other boy found his own completion.

Duo felt Heero's muscles constrict around him. He could only thrust back in a couple more times before he succumbed to the blinding pleasure that engulfed him. Duo cried out as he pumped his seed into the willing body of the boy who owned his heart. "Heero!"

Duo collapsed beside Heero, unable to move or speak. Heero gathered the other boy into his arms as Duo began to weep; this time, they were tears of joy and fulfillment instead of emptiness. They lay there for what seemed like an eternity. Heero held him until Duo pulled away to look into Heero's eyes; Duo saw a satisfied love in their depths.

Heero was seeing the same thing shining in Duo's. He knew Duo was happy, and that made him happy.

"I think you just made me fall in love with you, Duo Maxwell."

Duo's breath caught, knowing Heero would never say it unless he meant it. "I've been in love with you for so long, Heero. It's about fucking time you got with the program. I thought I was going to have to kill you." Duo's voice held a slight rebuke, but he smiled happily, a few lingering tears trailing down his cheeks. Heero wiped them away, laughing softly as he thought about how much he was going to enjoy learning how to be Duo's lover. He then thought about what Duo had said he wanted. With one quick motion, Heero had Duo underneath him.

"Hey! What are you doing, Heero?"

Heero smiled again at him. "Making sure you're never empty again, koi. Before this night is over, you will know what it's like to be completely fulfilled." Before Duo could protest, Heero covered Duo's mouth with his own. A few minutes later, there was no sign of protest as Heero began to do exactly what he promised.

The End

(:./tk/empty)