Title: Embracing The Darkness - Part 1/?
Author: tkmaxwell777 & INIQUITY
Category: Shonen Ai/Yaoi
Pairings: 1+2, (1x2x1 implied), 3x4
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimers: We don't own them, we just love them... love is 9/10 of the law, right?
Warnings: Angst, Lemon
Synopsis: It's after the war, and Quatre comes across Duo in a cafe alone. Why isn't Heero with him? Why does Duo look like a different person? And why does Quatre feel like something is very wrong?
"Why Heero? What have I done wrong?" Duo stared at the other pilot who was packing his belongings into a duffle bag. The war was over, and suddenly, the Wing pilot didn't seem to want their relationship anymore. Duo didn't understand, and the shuttered look on Heero's face didn't help.
"You didn't do anything wrong."
"Then why are you leaving me? I musta done something. Whatever I did..." Duo had placed his hands on the other boy's shoulders, trying to get him to explain why he was doing this.
Heero shoved him away. "I'm sorry, Duo, but I can't live with Death anymore. The war is over. It's time for me to accept that and leave the darkness behind."
With those words, he exited the apartment that they had been sharing for the past three months and left a destroyed Duo standing alone in the middle of the living room.
"I guess it's not as easy for a soldier to live with Death as I thought," he said out loud to himself. "I am Death. Love can never survive my darkness. I should have known better..."
<You are destined to be alone> the voice in his mind taunted.
"I should have known better..." Duo fell to his knees as he let the darkness consume him.
"Duo?" Quatre asked tentatively as he barely recognized his friend. Although they lived in the same city on the L4 colony now, they rarely got to see each other due to Quatre's busy schedule. He was more than a little surprised to see Duo in the cafe alone though; usually he and Heero were inseparable. "It's been a while since I saw you last. How are you? Where's Heero?"
Duo looked up, and Quatre took in the strained features. "Me? I'm fine! What about you and Trowa? Living happily ever after?" Duo's smile was just a little too wide.
<You don't look fine> Quatre thought to himself as he looked at the other boy more closely. The ashtray next to him was full, there were two empty paper coffee cups on he table, and Duo's hands were trembling slightly. "Trowa is well. We've been doing great." He took in Duo's gaunt face. "You sure you're okay, Duo?" the blonde asked, concern evident in his voice. "When did you start smoking?"
"Oh, these?" Duo asked nonchalantly, flicking the end of yet another cigarette. "A while. You can't kill Death, yanno, Q-man. Don't worry about it."
Quatre saw the flicker of something in those violet depths and felt his heart constrict. Something definitely wasn't right here. He tried to compare the boy before him with the boisterous pilot of Deathscythe and was alarmed when he realized there were way too many differences that weren't for the better. Duo was pale and much too thin; Quatre's concern only deepened. He tried to direct the conversation toward Heero several times, but Duo evaded every question, only mumbling once, "He's fine."
Quatre didn't know what else to say to his friend. He knew something was wrong, but he just couldn't pinpoint it. "Did something happen between you and Heero?" he asked cautiously.
Pain and anger flashed in those violet eyes before Duo could hide it. "There is no 'me and Heero', Quatre. Apparently, there never was." Duo stood up quickly. "Listen, Q, I'd love to talk to you longer, but I gotta get home." Duo hugged Quatre tightly. "Give Trowa a kiss for me." He pulled away and turned to go. "See ya." Before the stunned blonde could gather his thoughts, Duo was walking out the door.
Quatre stood there for a while, shocked beyond words as he realized what he had just seen. He quickly made his own way out the door to go home. He had to talk with Trowa. His heart was telling him that this was serious; Duo had cut off his braid.
"You didn't see him, Trowa. If you had, you'd know why I'm so upset!"
Trowa looked at his blonde lover and sighed heavily. "Quatre, I didn't say you shouldn't be upset. What I said was that we need to find out what's going on before we jump to conclusions." he replied calmly. He was chopping up a green pepper to add to his goulash simmering on the stove. He spared a glance as he paused to add, "Besides, getting upset will not help anything. We have to be calm if we want to help him."
Quatre took a deep breath. "Sorry. You're right. I just can't bear to see him like this, Trowa! He looks like he's self-destructing one step at a time."
Trowa frowned. He couldn't believe that Duo would do something like that, even if his relationship with Heero had failed. "Why don't you call Wufei? He would be the most logical person for Heero to go to. Maybe he told him what happened."
Quatre smiled. He knew his green-eyed lover would point him in the right direction. "That's a good idea. I will after dinner." He got up and walked up behind Trowa, wrapping his arms around the taller boy's waist as he laid his cheek against his back.
Trowa leaned back into the other boy's embrace. "Mmm, Quatre."
Quatre heard the need in Trowa's voice. The blonde raised himself on his tiptoes to press his lower body closer to him. He was rewarded with a low groan from Trowa as the other boy moved against him in response. Quatre moved his hands up Trowa's chest to rub his nipples lightly. "How long until dinner's ready?" he asked in a provocative voice.
"Long enough to take care of something else first," Trowa replied as he turned down the heat on the burner just before turning to pull Quatre to him. He quickly claimed his blonde lover's lips in a searing kiss.
Quatre moaned and moved his arms to encircle Trowa's neck. Trowa lifted him, and Quatre wrapped his legs around the other boy's waist, never breaking the kiss as their tongues began to intertwine passionately. Trowa grabbed the olive oil from the counter then carried Quatre with him over to one of the kitchen chairs, carefully sitting down until Quatre was straddling him.
"Trowa," Quatre breathed as he nibbled along the taller boy's jaw line. "I need you so much."
Clothes became a memory. Quatre rubbed himself against his lover, causing both of them to gasp as their erections met. Trowa captured Quatre's lips again as he covered his fingers with the oil. Quatre moaned in anticipation as Trowa inserted the first digit into his entrance.
"Trowa... mmm... hurry."
Trowa quickly complied with his lover's wishes, adding another finger to stretch him. Quatre was panting and moaning as the fingers moved in and out of his body. By the time Trowa raised the count to three, Quatre was thrusting against them, crying out each time Trowa touched that place deep inside that sent pure pleasure coursing through him.
"Ready, my love?" Trowa asked as he rubbed oil on his arousal, his deep green eyes never leaving the aqua blue ones as he spoke.
Desire burned in those sea colored depths as Quatre positioned himself over Trowa. "Yes. Now sit back and let me remind you how much I love you."
Trowa gasped as Quatre lowered himself completely onto his length in one motion. "Quatre!" The soft heat that enveloped him was exquisite. He closed his eyes, savoring the feeling that he knew so well. There were times he was in awe that Quatre loved him; he was always in awe of how Quatre loved him.
"Oh... Trowa!" Quatre cried out as he lifted up then impaled himself again, throwing his head back as he began a slow rhythm. He relished the groans of the green-eyed boy as he moved against him, loving that he could make Trowa feel that way. There had been a time when he feared he would never have the other boy's love, but Trowa had let Quatre help him overcome his inner demons and offered Quatre that which had become the most precious possession the blonde boy owned... Trowa's heart.
"Quatre... feels so good..." Trowa panted as his blonde lover thrust down again.
"My Trowa," Quatre said possessively as he continued to ride his lover, increasing the pace.
They moved together, whispering words of love as they kissed and touched each other. Trowa loved it when they took time to enjoy their couplings like this, even though taking Quatre hard and fast was a wonderful experience too. He wanted to give Quatre anything and everything the other boy could possibly want, and he tried to do that every day of their life together.
After what seemed like forever, they were both approaching climax. Trowa reached down and began stroking Quatre in time with their thrusts. It wasn't long until Quatre gave into the building pleasure and screamed out his passion as pulse after pulse of his essence flowed over Trowa's hand. "Trowa! Trowa! Trowa!"
Trowa felt Quatre tense and release, his muscles clamping down on his erection inside, taking him over the edge. He cried out Quatre's name as the blinding orgasm overtook him. He pumped his seed into his lover, holding him close as he trembled from the intensity; it was always a breathtaking moment for Trowa because it made him realize how much Quatre gave to him so willingly.
"Quatre," he whispered softly as he stroked the other boy's sweat-soaked hair from his face.
Quatre smiled brightly. "I love you, Trowa. With all of my heart, I love you."
"I love you too," he replied softly as he kissed Quatre's nose.
Quatre sighed happily then chuckled as he asked saucily, "So, what's for dinner?"
Wufei stared at the image of Quatre on his screen as the blonde boy spoke. "Hello Wufei. How are you?"
"Winner. I'm doing well. How about you and Trowa?"
Quatre smiled. "We're fine, but I was wondering if you'd heard from Heero or Duo lately?"
Wufei tensed. "I saw Heero about a month ago."
"Do you know what's going on between them?"
Wufei didn't answer at first then decided he had to say something. "I don't think it's any of our business."
"It's important, Wufei, or I wouldn't ask. I know how you feel about privacy, but it may mean Duo's life."
"Maxwell? What's wrong with him?" Wufei snorted.
"He looks like death warmed over."
"Maybe he's regretting what he did to Heero. He should." Wufei was a little angry at the way Duo had dismissed Heero. He'd sensed the hurt in Heero even though the other boy tried to hide it.
"Wufei, I need to find out what the hell is going on!" Quatre's raised his voice, signifying to Wufei that his blonde friend was taking this really hard. Maybe Maxwell was in trouble.
"All I know is what Heero told me. I don't understand what Maxwell could be upset about." Wufei hesitated, his brows furrowing in confusion. "He was the one who threw Heero out."
"What?" the blonde cried incredulously.
Wufei sighed. "Heero came here about a month ago. He said that Duo made him leave. I let him stay for a few days until he found a new apartment."
Quatre frowned. "Wufei, I know you care about Duo just as much as you do Heero, and Duo needs our help. I think he's trying to kill himself slowly. He's smoking, he's lost a lot of weight, and... he... he... cut off his braid."
Wufei's breath caught. "I don't understand, Quatre. Heero said..."
"I don't care what Heero said!" Quatre yelled; his face was flushed with anger. "Apparently, he's not telling the whole story. Duo is on a self-destructive path, and we have to do something, Wufei!"
"What did Duo tell you?" Wufei didn't want anything to happen to Maxwell just because he didn't want to betray Heero. As much as Duo aggravated him, Wufei cared for him greatly.
"He wouldn't even talk about Heero. When I asked him if anything had happened between them, he'd said that there had never been a 'he and Heero'. Wufei, I'm telling you that something is going on that neither one of us knows about. There is no way Duo made Heero leave."
Wufei nodded. It didn't make any sense. Now that he thought about it, Heero had been acting strangely. "Something didn't seem right to me the moment Heero stepped through my door, but I ignored it. He seemed to be running from something, and I've never known Yuy to run from anything. I think you're right about something else going on here. What can I do to help?"
Quatre sighed in what appeared to be relief. "Can you tell me where Heero is? I want to talk to him and find out the truth."
Quatre came back into the living room after talking with Wufei. "Heero told Wufei that Duo made him leave." It was said without preamble, and he watched Trowa turn to look at him, confusion evident.
"What? There's no way Duo would do that, Quatre."
"Which means Heero is lying. How could he do that? I've never known Heero to lie before."
Trowa thought for a moment. "Well, you know how Heero sees things differently than we do. Perhaps he perceives that Duo made him leave."
Quatre looked at his lover like he'd taken leave of his senses. "How could he 'perceive' that, Trowa?"
"I don't know, but I have a feeling that's behind all this."
Quatre bit his lip. "I'm going to go see him and find out. It's the only way. I can't help Duo until I understand how this happened."
"Be careful, Quatre. You don't know what state of mind Heero's in. If he has convinced himself that Duo is to blame, he may not be too receptive to you telling him otherwise."
"I will, love, but I can't let him keep deceiving himself if that's what he's doing." Quatre gave him a determined look. "And I will be as firm as necessary."
Trowa shook his head. He knew how tenacious his Quatre could be. He didn't envy Heero at all.
End Part 1
(:./tk/embracing1)
