Very serious, but I rather like this one. I think it has something important to say.
"Why can't he say those three little words?" grumbled Duo. "I just don't understand it."
"You must not understand him as much as you think you do, if you don't understand," said Wufei, who was bending his exercise bar. "It's an Asian guy thing."
"Say what?"
"You surprise me. I didn't think you'd need to hear it. After all, you're a man, aren't you?"
"And what the hell is that supposed to mean? What do you mean by 'Asian guy thing.'"
Wufei rolled his eyes and sighed in exasperation, but kept flexing the exercise bar. "In my own family, I never heard my father say,'I love you' to my mother and she never said it to him. They would both have laughed at the idea of saying it. I never saw them kiss or hold hands or do any of those things. Those things are so superficial and unimportant."
"Are you serious?" Duo stares at him with a frown. Frankly, he was totally appalled at his attitude.
"I'm quite serious," said Wufei, oblivious to how deeply his words bother Duo.
"Then how did you know that your parents loved each other?"
"Well, once she got really upset, I don't remember what it was about. She went for a walk for a couple hours to calm down. My father kept looking out the window, but he didn't say anything. He didn't say he was worried, but I could tell he was. After she came back, he didn't yell at her for worrying him. He used to complain that she should take care better of herself. Funny thing was that she'd say the same thing about him. Things like that."
"Damn, Wufei, that's not very romantic."
Wufei shook his head in aggravation. "That's such a Western notion. If you have such unrealistic expectations, you'll only set yourself up for disappointment."
Duo sighed and crossed his arms. "Well, what's your idea of the ideal relationship?"
Wufei thought about it for a minute. "Well, I know that my father and mother were faithful to each other. It's a relationship that doesn't need such words, where both can count on each other to be there no matter what. It was very reassuring for me, growing up, knowing that they would never divorce each other over such trivialities. It was like the sun rising and the sun setting. So what if they never said those things. They lived in the same house, slept in the same bed, raised me and ate at the same dinner table. They were a team. That's what is important. I've heard of people swear up and down how much they love each other, then they hop into bed with the next person they see. That shows you the value of those silly words."
Duo just stared at him. There's something behind what he's saying, but I'm not sure what. "Wufei, so you're telling me that those words have no value, no meaning? That's a terrible thing to say!"
"Hmph, you don't understand a thing. I know something about what I'm saying." Wufei is quiet for a second and stops flexing the bar. "I was married once. I guess you didn't know that."
"No, I didn't."
"It was an arranged marriage. We didn't like each other at all when we first saw each other. I dare say we despised each other. But I was willing to do my best to honor my part of the agreement as long as she did. Even our marriage vows didn't have the words 'love.' Still we were man and wife. Those type of things carry obligations. She's the reason I pilot a Gundam."
"What happened to her, Wufei?" Duo asked.
"She died." His voice got really quiet and pinched. "I failed as a husband. A husband is supposed to protect his wife. But you know what? Even when she was dying, we didn't say those words. She simply said that she wasn't Nataku, that I was." Suddenly, Wufei drops the bar and his face scrunches up as in pain. "Get out! Get out, right now!"
Duo quickly leaves the room, but not before he sees tears on Wufei's face, his fists clenched, knuckles white.
It was lunchtime. Heero slid a bowl of soup over to Duo. "Duo, you're quiet today."
"I am? I guess so. I was just thinking about something. I was wondering. . ."
"Wondering. . ."
"Whether you hate it when I call you little pet names sometimes and whether I embarass you when I tell you that I love you and hang all over you. But I can't help it, it's really how I feel. I really want you to know how I feel." That talk with Wufei really threw him for a loop. It must've done the same for Wufei as he hadn't left his room since then.
Heero looked surprised. "I find it very reassuring."
"Really?"
"Yeah, it makes me feel safe."
It's quiet for a little bit. Then Duo says, "I have a mission in a couple days. I have to leave tomorrow."
"Going alone?"
"Yeah. I'm going by myself. It doesn't look too hard. I should be back in a week or so."
Heero made a worried sound, kind of a low level growl of disapproval.
"What's wrong?"
"Wish I was there to protect you."
Duo closed his eyes and smiled. I see now, Duo thought. This is as far as he can go right now, but that's OK. Someday, he may be able to say the things I want him to say and I'm going to stick around for that day. But even if it never comes, I'll say it enough times for the two of us. Because I know how he feels. Suddenly, feeling a lot better, he opens his eyes, gets up and sits on Heero's lap, and says, "Lets do something fun. Doesn't matter what. Anything you want. Just something fun before I have to go."
Heero reaches and touches his face, his thumb grazing his lip. "Duo... "
The End
(:./mk/advice)
