20-Feb-2003
Title: Updated Sexual Harassment Policy
Author: Lasha Lee
Email: anakerie@cinci.rr.com
Pairings: Ummm...
Disclaimer: I don't own them. Sad.
Dear Team Members:
Below is our updated company policy on sexual harassment. We ask that all pilots respond to this email to acknowledge that they have read the policy and understand all parts.
Sexual harassment is defined as any unwanted attention of a personal nature. This can include verbal, written, or physical attention. Sexual harassment is illegal, and it demeans both the perpetrator and the victim. We have a zero tolerance policy regarding sexual harassment, and anyone disregarding this policy is subject to both immediate termination and legal action.
Some examples of unwanted verbal attention can include but are not limited to nicknames such as "baby", "honey", "sugar", "sweetie", and "Wuffiecakes." It is not acceptable to refer to your team members as "hunks", "studmuffins", or "All-beef stallions." While asking a team member out to dinner is not forbidden (provided the team member has not already expressed a firm lack of interest), asking in a manner such as "Hey, want something that'll make those jeans a little tighter, Circus Boy" is not acceptable.
Some examples of unwanted written attention can include but are not limited to suggestive emails, drawings, and full-page ads in the New York Times declaring the recipient of the attention, and we quote "Hot enough to melt a thermal shield."
Some examples of unwanted physical attention can include, but are not limited to hugging, kissing, groping, fondling, setting bones without permission, insisting on sharing a bed in a mansion that has 45 empty ones, unwarranted unraveling of braids, sucking on pony-tails, suggestive behavior with fire-arms, and glomping.
Once a teammate has made it clear that romantic interest is not returned, the interested party must immediately cease all attempts at a personal relationship.
If the interested party does not cease in their efforts, the victim of the harassment must immediately document all instances of unwanted affection and report them to their superiors.
Remember that you are role-models for our organization, and proper behavior is expected not only among yourselves but those you come in contact with. Please also note the following: while we can and will terminate our own employees who engage in sexual harassment, we are not authorized to terminate employees of other organizations who do so, nor are we authorized to terminate members of defunct royalty who do so. If you find yourself the victim of harassment from a member of an outside organization. If for example, you lose a duel and the victor demands you cover yourself in lemon jello and lick his toes in payment, you are responsible for your hiring your own legal counsel and the pressing of all charges.
Thank you
The Management
The End
(:./lasha/budget3)
