08-Jun-2003
Warnings: I don't know what to give you for warnings; it's mildly angsty, I guess. There's mention of death, but all of it's canonical, so. No new surprises in that department. Oh, just read it, please. *^_^*
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, and this fanfic is not intended to be taken as a claim to copyright of any of the characters or situations not created by me, nor is it meant as any form of disrespect to the creators and rightful owners.
You want to know why I'm the way I am? It's because I'm cursed. Death follows me everywhere I go; Death takes everyone I care about.
My earliest memory is of the death of my mother. I was very young, and the memory has faded with time; all I can recall now is knowing that she was gone, and struggling not to cry. My father followed soon after--both of them dead, just like that, thanks to yet another Plague that had been deliberately introduced into the colony.
Biological warfare. To this day, I don't know why or how I survived it. I've often wished that I hadn't.
I was on my own for a while, and then I found love again, in the most unexpected place... but it wasn't long before Death arrived, hard on the heels of my brief happiness. I have never forgiven myself for it, for my hard-headedness, for my lack of foresight... I have never forgiven myself for arriving too late to do anything but watch her die, slowly drowning in her own blood.
That was when I realized I was cursed. I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it by not letting anyone close, by not loving anyone...
And then *he* came along, and all my defenses shattered like a fortress built of eggshells. I don't go so far as to say I loved him, but that doesn't change the facts. He got under my skin. He became my obsession. He was stronger than I, in so many ways, and that made him both infuriating and *compelling*.
I began to think that he was stronger than the curse. Death continued to follow me, and he survived. I killed many, and lost many, and still he survived. For the first time, I began to hope that the curse could be broken, that it might be safe to care once more.
Until I killed him. I lost him just as I'd lost parents and wife and home, and this time I caused it with my own two hands.
I am Chang Wufei, the last of my people, and I am cursed. Death follows me everywhere I go, and takes everyone I care about.
That's why I'm the way I am.
~owari~
My first Wufei-centric fic! ^__^ I read an LJ comment by Blue Lightning that if anyone suffered the "everyone who loves me dies" curse, it was Wufei and not Duo, and the idea stuck with me. So for what it's worth, this SPAMfic is dedictated to Blue Lightning, with many thanks for provoking thought.
