23-April-2002
revised: 16-Jun-2002
Title: Magic Happens
Author: Ebonydove
Pairings: 2+1
Warnings: none
Author's notes: Duo's POV. Duo has joined the Preventers and finds himself thrown into a
mysterious plot after Heero agrees to return to earth and join up with him and
the Preventers. Duo is trying to figure out if he and Heero can have a
relationship and is struggling with getting his feelings across to Heero.
Feedback craved like so much chocolate...
Disclaimer: Go where the money's made. It ain't here. This is just for fun.
There was no sense in waking Wufei at two in the morning when we finally arrived back at the Preventers earthside shuttleport to send a car. And I had a sneaking suspicion after trying in vain to get Heero to be forthcoming with details during our flight that Wufei didn't really have all the answers to the Supercode thing either. So on my suggestion; Heero came back to my temporary lodging instead of staying in a hotel somewhere. I claimed it was for security. But my heart said something else.
He didn't bat an eye at the idea of staying with me, got into the car I 'borrowed' and we took off for my place. He quirked an eyebrow at me as I hot-wired the thing one handed, but didn't say anything. I grinned like an idiot. Hey, boosting cars was kinda in my blood, so why try to deny it? We certainly didn't want to walk ten blocks to the Preventers temp housing and my elbow was still screaming so I had to do it one-handed. What can I say? I'm talented in the adventure capitalism department.
The car ride was short and silent. My elbow was completely shot and was pretty much numb by the time I got us to our destination. I tried not to be worried about it. My ribs had subsided to a dull ache and it was good to be back in familiar territory where I knew I had all the things necessary to treat my wounds.
I punched in a series of numbers to the keypad and the front door to the Preventers residential complex hissed opened. We carried our stuff up and I let us in after punching in another code to my own room. I switched on the lights and laughed out loud at the expression on Heero's face as he was met by the cat rubbing herself across his legs. He shot me an odd look as if to say 'what gives?' which made me laugh harder. "Hey sweetie, ya missed me?" I picked her up and gave her a cuddle before tossing her in a nearby chair.
"You have a cat." He stared at her as she sniffed every inch of his shoes and pant legs that she could reach.
"You always were a master of the obvious, Heero." I chuckled as I took the bags from him and set his laptop down on the coffee table.
"What's her name?"
"I never got around to giving her one." I shied off the jacket, swearing to myself never to wear it again, and tossed it on the sofa. Then I went straight to the icebox and grabbed a couple of beers for us and a lot of ice for my elbow.
"How long have you had her?"
I smiled and took a big gulp of my beer. "'Bout a year."
He gave me a puzzled look before accepting the drink and settled himself on the sofa. The cat was there the moment he sat down perched on the back of it and staring at him with her big green eyes. He spared her a brief look before sipping his beer and turning back to me. "How's the arm?"
"Fucked up. I don't think it's broken though." I had had worse. This was small potatoes compared to some of the fucked up shit I managed to live through in the short time of my young life. I felt like I was a sixty five-year-old man living in the body of an eighteen-year-old right now. I kicked off my boots and put my feet up on the coffee table as he hunkered down on the soft sofa.
"Demo Duo."
"For what? Being gone for the ten minutes it took me to find trouble, smash my elbow, and almost get my head caved in by some ex-heavyweight guy?" I joked and wrapped the ice around the most swollen part of my elbow. I didn't mean to hiss as the cold ice hit the broken skin.
"For being gone for almost two years and never telling you why."
I was trying to play it cool and took another swig from my bottle as he sat closer next to me, but inside I was nervous as hell. "A lot happened after the wars, Heero. We all kinda lost touch." I grinned at him. "Shit, I practically fell off the face of the Universe." He didn't say anything and he still had on his 'I don't really want to talk about it, but why don't you try to drag it out of me anyway face' so I forged on ahead. "It's time to leave those things in the past and move on with our lives."
He suddenly grew very still next to me. Then his eyes met mine and he gave me a tiny, soft smile. I felt my heart pounding in my chest as we sat there for a few moments just being in each other's presence. He sipped his beer again as I closed my eyes and tried to let the crazy events of the past few days float to the back of my mind. My eyes flew back open when I felt the featherlight touch of his fingers on the bruised side of my head. He gently moved the strands of hair away from the area and took a piece of ice from my cloth to run it over the swelling. "You're bleeding Duo."
"I'm aware of that, Heero."
He gave me a little smirk and ran his fingers lightly down the side of my face. Then he tucked the hair above my ear back behind it as it had come out of my braid. The soothing touches on my face and hair made the tension I had not realized I was showing so noticeably begin to release and I soon found my mind starting to drift off again. My eyes slid back shut and I sipped my beer just enjoying being in the moment.
Then it happened.
When he leaned forward it took me a second to register what he was doing. My eyes flew open for the second time in a few minutes as his lips brushed softly against mine in the sweetest, most tender kiss I ever had. It was shy and only lasted a brief moment or two, but to me it was like time stood still. Grinding to a complete halt where whole planets could have burst and been remade. I sat stunned tasting his kiss mingled with the slight tang from the beer on my lips. Then time started again and I swear I could feel the earth regain its spin. I was so lightheaded. He brushed his fingers down my arm and over my swollen elbow, taking the ice from my grip and holding it in place for me. "I'm glad you came to L1." Between his voice and his touch I started to shiver.
"Heero, I... " I didn't even know what to say. I had so many dreams and scenarios that I had played out in my head about this very moment, and now that I found myself in it I was at a loss as to what to say or do. What was worse was that I was trying not to let the waves of anger boiling up from way down inside come bubbling up. I was getting mad. It was irrational I know, but I was pissed. Why would he do this to me? If he had feelings for me why hadn't he come to me? Why had we wasted two years when we could have been together?
"You don't need to say anything, Duo."
My brain was like oatmeal. I saw the look Relena had on her face when we left. I know that look, hell I wore that face for almost two fuckin' years! I liked her, I respected her, and I knew that when she saw him leave with me that she thought he had made a choice. I suddenly wanted to throw up. It was what I wanted. I wanted Heero, but I couldn't help but feel wrong about it.
I shot up off the sofa sending the cat hissing and chugged the rest of the beer I had in my hand, and then went to the kitchen to get another. I could feel his eyes on me the entire time. But I didn't want to confront what I would see, so I didn't look directly at him I stood with hands shaking in the kitchenette.
"Duo, I thought that's what you came to L1 for."
"Who told you that, Wufei?" I hadn't meant to let out the near hysterical bark as I finished half of the second bottle of beer. He didn't answer me, which just confirmed it. I slammed the bottle on the counter top and stared back at him.
"Why are you angry?"
His face was the picture of confusion and it made my anger take on a rapier edge. "Oh I don't know. Maybe because I got what I wanted after waiting for almost two years of self imposed seclusion and depression thinking that you were in love with Relena, the fucking hope for the world! Maybe because I know how she feels right now, alone on L1, her heart bleeding from being torn away from the only thing she's ever loved, because that's how I had felt for the past two years on L2! Christ, throughout most of the past two fuckin' wars! If you had feelings for me Heero you damn well could have told me before now!"
"I'm sorry I hurt you Duo." He paused and looked at me with sad eyes, old beyond his years. "I never meant to hurt her either." Hearing his voice so full of regret made me realize I had just said all that out loud.
I had to admit it. I was fucking scared. I just told him everything I had been thinking since the day he left. I shook my head and studied the floor, trying to get my head to stop spinning and my pulse rate back to something even remotely normal. I picked my beer back up and sat back down on the sofa, taking the ice back and hissing again as the coldness hit my elbow. "I don't know what's wrong with me Heero. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I'm glad I came to L1, I just wish Wufei hadn't told you that I was coming."
Heero cocked his head slightly as I leaned back against the cushions. He took the ice back from me and pressed it against my head. "Duo, there are some very powerful people after that code I developed. Things could get... complicated."
I laughed out loud. "Complicated, huh?" Heero always had been able to skirt around talking about personal stuff with his ability to change the topic so easily. Even in my mush brain state I could decipher what he was saying. Although I didn't know what to do about my conflicting feelings for him, I knew I'd follow him into hell. And have. I would again, if he needed me. "I'm in. Whatever you need, Heero. I'll always have your back."
"Duo, I didn't want you to get involved with this. You could become a serious liability if anyone found out you were working on this with me."
I ignored the liability thing. I had heard that before and this time would be no different. "Umm humm. I know, I could get hurt, the information could fall into the wrong hands, I gotcha. It doesn't change my mind." I was going to help him whether he wanted me to or not. "Does Wufei know all this? And just how powerful is powerful?"
"Yes, and powerful enough to have the resources to track me down and put Relena in danger."
"Great." I ran my fingers through my hair flinching at the tenderness at the back of my head where it got bounced off the cement and finished the beer. This time when I went I to the icebox I pulled out four more. One for him, three for me. I had a feeling I wanted to be drunk at the end of this conversation. "Trowa and Q?"
"Aware, but not fully. Wufei also knows most of what's going on, but I have some other things I have recently found out from Relena that he doesn't know." That made me curious. But I didn't pursue it just then. I wanted to have a private chat with Wufei anyway. Goddamn busy body. I love the guy to death, but I certainly didn't need him running interference for Heero and me.
"Duo?"
Shit. I could tell by the change of tone of his voice that the conversation was going to take another turn. He was going to say something about the damn kiss. The fucking wonderful, soul shattering, brain melting, gut wrenching kiss that I've been waiting for for almost five years that I still hadn't really acknowledged. I turned to him to try my innocent face routine, but it never worked on him before so I don't know I why I was going to try it now. "What?"
He kissed me. Hard.
I blinked. I broke the kiss out of sure panic. Because this time I wasn't angry or confused when I broke it. I wanted it. I wanted more. I wanted him. "If someone slipped the envelope under my door at the hotel on L1. Doesn't that mean your code has already been compromised?"
He kissed me again. This time wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me forward and burying a hand in my already dishelved hair. I pulled away again gasping for air. "And if your code's been compromised doesn't that mean that the operatives using it are already in danger?"
He nipped at the hollow of my throat as I desperately tried to concentrate on my train of thought and not at my cackling libido. "Do you think it is wise to leave them out there if they are in danger? Shouldn't we warn them?"
He let go of me and got up explosively from the sofa, knocking one of the bottles off the table accidentally. The moved surprised me. I just sat and watched him pace around the room for a minute, frowning and glaring at me like he used to when I took the upper bunk at a boarding school during the war.
"What do you want from me?" His death glare in full force made me swallow.
I guess he was the one who was pissed now. I mean Perfect Soldier; I want to snap your neck like a chicken pissed. I knew the answer to this one, but for some reason I was feeling suicidal. "I think the question is Heero, what the fuck do you expect from me?" I couldn't help the smirk that crept onto my face like a familiar friend. Like I said old habits.
"I didn't expect anything."
Oh I don't think so. This was not going to turn into my fault. "Bullshit. Wufei told you that I was coming. You sent a goddamn car to pick me up at the shuttle port. You invited me to stay with you at Relena's estate, which may I just say; was cruel. You've kept me in the dark about this whole damn code thing for two years when all you had to do was pick up the fucking phone and call me to tell me you needed help. That you needed me!" At some point I had risen and was now screaming at him. I was so busy yelling that I missed when his face changed from pissed to wonder.
"I didn't understand that you felt that way for so long." He said quietly as I paused to chug down another half a bottle of beer.
"That's bullshit too, Heero and you know it. Don't fucking stand there and tell me you didn't understand." It was sad. The whole thing is just so damn sad. I could just grab him, fuck him, lock him in my closet and be happy, but no. "And Relena?" I've always been destructive. So I was fighting with him instead, and I was winning.
"What about her?"
I wanted to deck him. Clean his goddamn clock. "This is exactly what I'm talking about Heero. You can't play me anymore. We're not fifteen fighting in a war we thought we'd die in. You can't expect me to just accept things when you decide to stroll into my life, and you're being cruel by not letting her know where you stand. You can't have us both." When did I get so close to the edge of the cliff, and why the hell didn't my brain's self preservation mode kick in?
"You came to L1 looking for me."
Okay, point.
But I didn't come to break him up with the girl. I wanted to come and make sure he was happy before I could move on with my own life. To try to salvage something of my own heart. I wanted to die when he left after the Mariemeia thing and went to be with Relena. I didn't think I'd ever be able to get my heart up off the floor, but I muddled through. I came to L1 to see if I could ever love anyone else as much as I loved him. I came to let go.
I looked back to him to see that he was staring at me like I had just grown two heads. Oh shit. "I said that out loud didn't I?"
He gave me a small nod. "Do you still feel... that way?"
I heard the voice. I didn't want to admit how he sounded. He was afraid of what I was going to say and it was written all over his face. "Feel what way?"
He looked like he wanted to choke me, but I had said a lot in a very short amount of time, under diress, and I had long ago lost what point I was trying to get across to him. I loved him. I loved him enough to let him go. I wanted him to be happy. I couldn't believe it had taken me so long to realize it.
"Do you still want... to let me go?"
I refused to be the one who asked him to choose; to pick me over her. I wasn't going to let go of the only thing I had. I know pride is for fools, but it was all I had left. Without that I would have to tell him that I would always love him and only him, until they covered my stinking, rotten corpse with L2 mud. "If Relena makes you happy and if care for her, then yes. I'd let you go."
"But what if I loved you?"
I couldn't get my mouth to work. My self-preservation mode finally came to my rescue and pulled me away from the cliff just as I was about to allow myself to pitch forward into the abyss. I shook my head trying to force my brain to say it's what I wanted, but I couldn't. I was just too dumbstruck. "I... Heero... "
"I love you." He said as he walked towards me.
I stepped back and shut my eyes. "Don't say that... I can't... I... "
"I love you, Duo."
He grabbed my arms and refused to let me retreat any further. I dropped the ice and blanched from the pain in my elbow, but he held me fast. I turned my head away from him so I wouldn't be drawn into those damned blue eyes but it didn't keep me from shivering as I felt his warm breath ghosting over my ear.
"I choose you."
Aw fuck it. I shoved my fears aside, ran to the edge and plunged myself over. It was just like when we basejumped from the hospital only it was in my head. And I had no chute to break my fall. And maybe this time he wouldn't walk away from me. I could only hope.
I think I scared him when I exploded forward and sent us tumbling to the carpet. I meant to do it, to tackle him. I didn't even care that my elbow was screaming, or that my ribs felt like they were going to burst outta my skin. I landed on top of him and smothered him with kisses on any part of him I could reach. He lay there flat on his back and let me straddle him and devour him with kisses. It was what I wanted. Screw Relena.
I never told a lie; that's true, but I never said I wasn't a hypocrite.
And I sure as Hell wasn't a saint.
End Part 6
(:./ebony/magic6)
