Top Ten Lines You Wanted to Hear Zechs Say: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | To himself, when parachuting out of his Leo after battling Heero: "I knew I grew my hair long for a reason!" |
| 9. | To his men, showing them pictures on board the submarine, looking for Wing: "Got the pics from the last OZ party!" |
| 8. | To Noin, when she taps his sword as he takes a call: "I get the point, Lieutenant, but do you mind? I can't hear a thing!" |
| 7. | To Treize, after His Excellency asks him to take off the mask: "Ah... no. I can't... Bad hair day." |
| 6. | To Heero, after the Japanese pilot says he'll thank Zechs by killing him: "That's okay - you go right ahead and be rude. Don't mind me." |
| 5. | To Relena, after she flies into the battle at the South Pole: "Come on, Heero! Target practice!" |
| 4. | To himself, after Lady Une threatens the colonies during his fight with Heero in Siberia: "This is so embarrassing..." |
| 3. | To Une, when he meets her in space as the Sank Kingdom Envoy: "So, you used to be Lady Une and now you're Saint Une. and I used to be Zechs Marquise, but now I'm Miriald Peacecraft... is anyone else here confused??" |
| 2. | To Heero, after trading Wing Zero for Epyon: "Oh, something made by Treize - at least that kind of mind-warping I have experience with..." |
| 1. | To Heero, when they're deciding who should take out the Libra's reactor: "I'll die to save Earth." Heero: "No, I'll die to save Earth. Zechs: "No. really, I'll die to save Earth!" Heero: "I insist, I'll die to save Earth!" *BOOOOOOM* |
Top Ten Signs You're Obsessed With Zechs: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | You've taken up brooding for hours in your room - mostly about your inadequacies. |
| 9. | You try to get to your school or place of work faster each day and no amount of speed really satisfies you. |
| 8. | You've already dyed your hair a nice platinum color - now if only it was fifteen inches longer... |
| 7. | You tend to shout, "Zechs! Banzai!!" whenever you jump into a swimming pool. |
| 6. | You suddenly see the sheer romance there is to be had in changing your name. |
| 5. | You have determined that the costume shop in town does take special orders - in fact they already have yours. |
| 4. | That irritating little brat of a sister you have is starting to look like she needs protecting... |
| 3. | You have named your car, your bike, your cat, and your favorite pump at the gas station, "Tallgeese." |
| 2. | You've actually looked up what the title is for the spouse of a Marquise. |
| 1. | You've memorized the Three Conditions for Peace from episode 49 and recite them to whomever will listen. |
Top Ten Things Zechs would want if he was stranded on a desert island : | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Sun tan lotion... |
| 9. | ... and Treize to put it on his back. |
| 8. | A pair of good sunglasses, so when he stares at the ocean and broods, he won't get wrinkles. |
| 7. | A battery-operated iron: being stranded is no excuse for looking less than impeccably dressed. |
| 6. | A jet ski - to satisfy the Need for Speed. |
| 5. | Several bottles of Pantene Pro-V, to keep those golden tresses from salt water distress. |
| 4. | A volleyball and net. |
| 3. | Scuba diving equipment. |
| 2. | A small beach hut to retreat to when he gets moody. |
| 1. | A really big, really confortable. sleeping bag. |
Top Ten Question Zechs Would Hate to be Asked: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Fess up - you *loved* having your sword tapped, didn't you? |
| 9. | So, how about those crazy kids Alex and Mueller, eh? |
| 8. | Dearest brother, you don't *really* mean to destroy Earth. You're just having a temper tantrum aren't you? |
| 7. | Can you go a little slower? |
| 6. | Come on, admit it. You'd love an unfair advantage, wouldn't you? |
| 5. | Does that thing give you "mask hair?" |
| 4. | Would you consider being one of Charlie's Angels? |
| 3. | Ever heard of a haircut? |
| 2. | Do you ever get the urge to do pirouettes in Tallgeese? |
| 1. | Are you a bottle blond? |
Top Ten Things Zechs Hates To Receive In The Mail: Graciously donated by Ravin Lorance - thanks! | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Letters from Noin, demanding to know how he feels about her. |
| 9. | Taunting notes from Heero saying things like, "my super vernier data is better than yours! Nyaaahhh!" |
| 8. | Long letters from Relena demanding to know if he's Zechs Marquise or Miriald Peacecraft. |
| 7. | Hate mail from Alex and Walker, threatening to steal his mask and put it up on top of the OZ flag pole. |
| 6. | Brochures seminars on how to handle anger and depression - sent to him by Noin. |
| 5. | Letters from the people of Sank, saying that the country is awash in burgandy-clad schoolgirls and could he please come take over the throne! |
| 4. | Invitations to Relena's dinner parties that say he can't bring Treize. |
| 3. | Notice from the Specials' Lake Victoria Academy that they got the scores wrong - Noin really did get first place. |
| 2. | Paparazzi photos of him in a wrinkled uniform. The scoundrels!! |
| 1. | Cute postcards from Treize that say, "Don't be silly. Of course you can still be my friend! Come over and play." |
Top Ten Self-Help/Teaching Videos Zechs Has in His Possession: Graciously donated by Golden Usagi - thanks! | |
|---|---|
| 10. | How to Avoid Potentially Dangerous Military Conflicts: Leave the Fight on Some False Pretense |
| 9. | No Matter How Good You Are, Some Kid Out There is Better: Accepting the Truth |
| 8. | It's Not Your Fault |
| 7. | How to Win the Support of Your Men so that They do the Dying for You |
| 6. | Hair Care During Warfare |
| 5. | How to Confuse Your Enemies: Switch Sides Constantly while Having Multiple Names which you Interchange Randomly |
| 4. | Never Use a Mobile Suit that Doesn't Give You Medical and Psychological Problems: There's no Challenge |
| 3. | The Past is in the Past: Stop Your Brooding and Revenge Seeking |
| 2. | Family Counselor VI: How to Get Along with Your Sister |
| 1. | You Think the World is Against You? Well They Are. Deal With It. Destroy It. |
Top Ten Lines You'll (Hopefully) Never Hear Zechs Say: Inspired by CJ Comer - thanks! | |
|---|---|
| 10. | To hell with my Father -I'm taking off this stupid mask! |
| 9. | Faster is not better. |
| 8. | I think I'll make a damn fine king - and I'm gorgeous to boot. |
| 7. | Oh, all right Heero - you can self-destruct this time. |
| 6. | Dorothy, you were *such* a help back there! |
| 5. | No thanks, I'll take the slower mech. |
| 4. | I would never have feelings for a superior officer! |
| 3. | *to Heero* Ew! You shook my hand! Now I have cooties!! |
| 2. | Relena, it's wonderful the way you understand me... |
| 1. | *aboard the Libra* Oops! Did I push the wrong button? |
Zechs's Top Ten New Year's Resolutions: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | To go faster. |
| 9. | To finally decide which name he's going to use. (The sheer number of checks and credit cards...) |
| 8. | To, just once, pop up from under the bubbles while Une is receiving orders from Treize. |
| 7. | To shake the hands of all the other g-boys. |
| 6. | When feeling despair and anger, to go to the time out chair and count to ten before arranging a Libra drop. |
| 5. | To finally break the news to Noin. ^_~ |
| 4. | To let Heero win - just once. |
| 3. | To get someone to redesign that weird little white Sank suit. |
| 2. | To go to the Opera with Treize - without protest. |
| 1. | To finally live up to his brotherly responsibilities and get Relena (and himself!) some psychological help. |
Top Ten Holiday Events Zechs Is Looking Forward To: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Sitting on Santa's lap at the OZ Holiday Party. |
| 9. | Spiking Relena's punch so she can't interrupt the snowball fight with Heero. |
| 8. | Operation Snow Drop: making a giant snowball, ringing Treize's door bell and then waiting to drop it on him. |
| 7. | Calculating the speed Santa would have to go to reach every house in the world in one evening... |
| 6. | and actually achieving that speed in Tallgeese. |
| 5. | Watching Treize get tangled in the Christmas tree lights. |
| 4. | Blushing fiercely when Noin holds the mistletoe over his head. |
| 3. | "Lighting" the Romefeller Christmas tree with Epyon's heat whip. |
| 2. | Challenging Lady Une to a game of Armored Core 14 on the PlayStation 2 Treize bought. |
| 1. | Winning the snowball fight with Heero. |
Top Ten Items Zechs would buy in bulk: Idea graciously donated by Shikyouta | |
|---|---|
| 10. | crazy glue (anyone notice he wears his mask again after it breaks? Now we know the secret.) |
| 9. | stomach medicine - can you imagine what his must be like with all that stress and brooding? |
| 8. | fresh strawberries - he dips them in chocolate so he and Treize can feed them to each other ^_~ |
| 7. | Clearsil™ - he actually buys this for Relena (she doesn't want anyone to know) |
| 6. | white gloves (goes in halfsies with Treize) |
| 5. | Pantene Pro-V™ shampoo: self-explanatory, neh? |
| 4. | Prozac (also self-explanatory -_-;;) |
| 3. | Dove™ milk chocolate hearts - an elegant buzz before he takes off in Tallgeese... |
| 2. | Wild Turkey™ - he'll never live down that pic! |
| 1. | gundanium |
Top Ten Things Zechs would do at the mall: Graciously donated by Golden Usagi | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Bought an assortment of designer brushes when he thought Treize wasn't looking. |
| 9. | Also debated for half an hour what brand of shampoo he was going to buy this time (he had five bottles at home, but you can never have enough). |
| 8. | Sulked as he followed Treize around the flower shop. |
| 7. | Got bored doing that, and also went into the mask shop, where he and Trowa had a short conversation (very short, you know Trowa). |
| 6. | Had a staring contest with Heero. |
| 5. | Didn't win, but only because he had to leave to prevent some disaster of greater importance. |
| 4. | Thought of destroying the mall for its own good, but Relena got in his way. |
| 3. | Was asked by a sales clerk if he didn't want to try on a jacket in his size. |
| 2. | Checked his heart rate at one of those little stations--he hadn't completely recovered from that Tallgeese experience. |
| 1. | Was unimpressed by the Star Wars flight simulator ride in the arcade--it wasn't nearly fast enough, plus no crushing gravity forces. |
Top Ten Oscars Zechs could win: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Best (but Most Improbable) Hair on a Soldier |
| 9. | Best All-Around Pilot (so says the miko! ^_~) |
| 8. | Best Use of a Whip in a Non-Pornographic Role |
| 7. | Best-Looking Actor in a Brooding Role |
| 6. | Noblest Acting with Blood On His Hands |
| 5. | Fastest Acquisition of a Galaxy-Class Space Fortress (Peacemillion - where they heck does he get that, anyway??) |
| 4. | Most Wicked Mech That Isn't a Gundam (Tallgeese) |
| 3. | Calmest Reaction When Being Come On To with Swordtaps |
| 2. | Most Adorable When Trying to Escape his Soulmate (Treize, not Noin ^_~) |
| 1. | Best Costume in a World-Destroying Role (The trenchcoat and the thigh holster - swoon...) |
Top Ten Jeopardy Categories for Zechs: (for best effect, insert the phrase, "I'll take" before each category and "for 300, Alex" after) | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Metal Care & Maintenance |
| 9. | Heavy G-Force Tips & Tricks |
| 8. | Obscure Mech Stats |
| 7. | Sibling Rivalry |
| 6. | Revenge Plots |
| 5. | Hairy Father Figures |
| 4. | Armageddon Strategies |
| 3. | Large-Scale Guilt (he'll compete with Quatre for this category) |
| 2. | Heero Worship |
| 1. | Famous Colony Drops |
Top Ten Signs That You've Been Hanging Around Zechs Too Much: Inspired by lists from Tataragami | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Lately you simply haven't been able to drive your car fast enough. You think the trouble might be with the super-vernier |
| 9. | At your greatest moments of glory you feel an overwhelming sense of inadequacy... |
| 8. | ...and then go around telling all your friends (strangers, too) that your hands are stained with blood. |
| 7. | You find yourself strangely attracted to displays of Halloween masks. |
| 6. | The thought has occurred to you that,even though you're the best at what you do, some little punk out there is probably better. |
| 5. | Vengeance has become a primary driving force in your life --and it's started raising eyebrows among your friends and family. |
| 4. | You wish fervently that those raised eyebrows were forked. |
| 3. | Whenever you have coffee, you begin to brood and think about destroying the world for its own good. |
| 2. | You have a secret dsesire to play the title role in "The Phantom of the Opera." |
| 1. | You feel and overwhelming urge to protect your little sister, even though she irritates the hell out of you. |
Zechs' Top Ten Uses for a Paper Clip: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | as a substitute comb for getting out those dishonorable tangles in his hair (Zechs: tangles? who gets tangles??? Hmph.) |
| 9. | as a spare part for the honorable task of rebuilding his arch enemy's gundam |
| 8. | to unjam the parachute button after he jumps out of a destroyed mech |
| 7. | to tuck in that scarf (which always seems to be in place, even after he's been fighting off an entire squadron of Space Leos) |
| 6. | to scratch the parts of his legs that are covered by thigh-high OZ boots |
| 5. | to launch spit balls at Dorothy if she gets in his way again... |
| 4. | threaten to pierce Relena's ears with it if she gets weepy and calls out, "Hee~ro!" one more time on board the Libra |
| 3. | to jam Libra's controls when he changes his mind about the drop (*shrugs* better than flying your mech into the reactor, ne?) |
| 2. | put it on a chain and give it to Noin - that woman would be glad to get *anything* from you! (poor Noin...) |
| 1. | when the battle with Heero gets tough, he'll use it as a barrette to keep his bangs out of his eyes and gain a huge advantage |
Top Ten GW Things You're Likely to Find in Zechs's Fridge/Freezer: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | half a dozen beer bratwursts -- 20 minutes on the Stairmaster™ for each one, though... |
| 9. | a new jet fuel he's been working on for Tallgeese (looks a lot like ice tea) |
| 8. | champagne - in case Treize stops by ^_~ |
| 7. | a half-eaten hot fudge sundae that Relena left on her last visit |
| 6. | his spare mask |
| 5. | homemade potato salad (a secret weakness) |
| 4. | a six-pack of Diet Pepsi™ for Noin's visits |
| 3. | souvenir ice block from the antarctic to commemorate his duel with Heero |
| 2. | leftover beef stroganoff from an intimate dinner with Treize |
| 1. | silver polish |
Top Ten GW Toys Zechs Would Like to See Bandai Release: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Voodoo? ZechsDo! A cuddly Lightning Baron doll for the episodes when you love him; a set of pins for when you hate him. |
| 9. | Fashion Zechs action figure: dress him up in one of *three* uniforms! (OZ! Sank Kingdom! White Fang!) |
| 8. | Sank Kingdom Action Battle Playset: Invading mechs, dead monarchs, and squealing baby sisters included. |
| 7. | From the OZ Collection: Realistic silver helmet with platinum hair attached. (muscular chest & washboard stomach sold separately.) |
| 6. | Also From the OZ Collection: the quintessential White Fang trenchcoat (ascot and gloves sold separately.) |
| 5. | My Buddy Noin - wind her up and watch her follow you around the room. She'll even keep your pesky little sister entertained! |
| 4. | Libra Drop! playset: one punch of a button and the ship crashes from its stand onto a terrified model earth. With realistic screams! |
| 3. | Decisions, Decisions: an exciting board game where Treize and Noin run an obstacle course to see who gets to Zechs first! (2 players) |
| 2. | MegaAction Battle Arena: a playing surface that can change from snowy to space-like and a Heero action figure. |
| 1. | The Barrier (add-on to #2): A super-strong cone that prevents the Une or Relena action figures from disrupting warplay. |
Top Ten Signs That Zechs Needs a New Mech: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Crushing g-forces and punishing speeds have torn apart the old one - again. |
| 9. | The pilot seat no longer goes back far enough to accomodate his legs. |
| 8. | He can't get the speedometer to move past 150. |
| 7. | He hasn't had a good heart attack in months. |
| 6. | The suit can actually be piloted by mere mortals. |
| 5. | Noin has hidden a video camera somewhere in the cockpit. |
| 4. | It's less than 20 years old. |
| 3. | The safety harnesses pull on his hair. |
| 2. | He's gotten so used to the Zero system in his old mech that he no longer has terrifying hallucinations in it. He misses those. |
| 1. | He's already fought Heero in the mech he currently uses. What other thrills are possible? |
Top Ten Products or Services We'd Like to See & Would Rather Not See Zechs Endorse: | |
|---|---|
| Like to see: | |
| 10. | Indy 500 racing - The Lightning Count could convey the Need for Speed like no one else. |
| 9. | Any expensive liqueur where we could see him draped over the bottle |
| 8. | Brown-to-blue contact lenses - who has to know they're real? |
| 7. | Lesson at a skydiving school - remember how he looked in the first episode when he parachuted out of the Leo? |
| 6. | The Wimbledon Collection of aristocratic sportswear |
| Would Rather Not See: | |
| 5. | Workshops on Conflict Resolution - "It's simple people. Just find the source of the conflict and completely destroy him/her/or them." |
| 4. | Wal-Mart - another one of those images that just wouldn't come |
| 3. | Large-scale farm machinery-speaks for itself, doesn't it? |
| 2. | Self-esteem seminars - "Perhaps you believe you've disappointed someone. Like your Father. And your Country. And your One True Love. And..." |
| 1. | Jell-o pudding- *in a threatening voice* "Would someone kindly get these children off of me?" |
Top Ten Signs That You're on a Date With Zechs: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | Your date suggests dinner and then dropping by the hangar to check the super vernian data. |
| 9. | When you pick him up a half dozen neatly uniformed men are in line ahead of you. |
| 8. | After the waiter takes your order, your date passes the time by making goo-goo eyes at you with his hand over his face. |
| 7. | You're discussing the possibility of sex and your date asks if you've ever been to bed with a masked man. Then he smiles slyly. |
| 6. | A good portion of the evening is taken up by silent brooding. |
| 5. | At the amusement park, on the bumper cars, your date yells, "Can't you fight honorably?" at the 10-year-old who just rammed him. |
| 4. | Your six-foot-tall date arrives in a jacket that looks like it might fit Quatre |
| 3. | You're in the shampoo aisle of the Body Shop - for the third time that evening. |
| 2. | Your plans for getting intimate in front of the fire are interrupted by something silver - and I don't mean a ring. |
| 1. | Your head is spinning -not from love, but from driving to the theater at Mach 2. |
Top Ten Reasons to Like Zechs: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | He's modest: He either beats Heero or fights him to a standstill in every battle, but still thinks he's a "flawed soldier." |
| 9. | He recognized Noin for the intelligent and supremely talented individual she is. |
| 8. | His name just oozes coolness. |
| 7. | He's the true heir to the Sank Kingdom (or would be if his low self-esteem didn't keep getting in the way.) |
| 6. | Great rapport with the personnel: His men actually believe it's an honor to die for him... |
| 5. | ...and scream his name as they do it. |
| 4. | The mask: An air of mystery and protection from disintegrating OZ bases - all in one strange piece of headgear. |
| 3. | He only wore that ridiculous Sank Kingdom suit once, then recognized it for the fashion disaster it is. |
| 2. | He shows a lot of style in his pick of best friends. |
| 1. | He's the Lightning Baron -enough said. |
Zechs' Top Ten Vacation Destinations When GW comes to the U.S.: | |
|---|---|
| 10. | New York, New York - he can drink coffee and brood at a Greenwich Village cafe and look just like the locals. |
| 9. | New York, New York - to Broadway for Phantom of the Opera.. A lonely genius, doomed love, a mask - it's perfect. |
| 8. | Cape Canaveral, Florida - to try out for the space program and a chance to fly the shuttle. |
| 7. | Las Vegas, Nevada - to stay at Caesar's Palace. Hey, if Relena got Sank... |
| 6. | Calistoga, California -Treize will be there in the hot springs and the General will insist. (hee hee) |
| 5. | Edwards Air Force Base, California - after taming Tallgeese, what could the test pilots possibly have on him? |
| 4. | New Orleans, Louisiana -he can keep Duo from going too far to get parade favors and besides, everyone's in a mask! |
| 3. | Colorado Springs, Colorado - no doubt that itchy trigger finger he's got will lead him straight to N.O.R.A.D. |
| 2. | Offutt Air Force Base, Nebraska -he and Treize will visit U.S. Strategic Command and buy cool souvenir jackets in the gift shop. |
| 1. | St. Louis, Missouri - to indulge his passion for brooding in the home of blues music. |
The End
(:./kumiko/top6)
