22-Aug-2007
Title: Seasonal Drift Part Fourteen
Author: Ebonydove
Archived: GWAddiction
Warnings: Duo's POV
Rating: PG13
Spoilers: yes, from the last episodes of the series
Authors notes: Forgive me know for where this is heading...the muse decided late in the game. I also had a lot of trouble posting, so will reply with the rest.
It was damn hard to concentrate while Heero was pressed up against me. What made it worse was that just the light touch of his skin against mine made it near impossible to remember what it was that I was trying to do just moments before. The need that was rolling off him made all thoughts of fatigue, hunger, hell -- even the sense of constant fear that had been licking at my heels like wild dogs since we had been on the run, disappear. I've never thought of Heero as weak in any sense of the word for one instant the entire time I've known him, and despite the unnerving turn of events and his sudden vulnerability, he was still like steel in my arms and was looking for me to be steady when he wasn't. In the moment, I thought I was up for it and shrugged away all thoughts that we had been moving way too fast after being just partners for so very damn long. It was like holding a robin's egg, beautiful, fragile, and with the wrong amount of warmth or pressure it could be destroyed.
I held him for a few more moments before catching a sniff of my own stink. The hot spray of the shower was sure to be fading to a cooler temperature and I knew that the bathroom wasn't the right place for this kind of consoling. I gave him a hard squeeze reinforcing that I understood the drift from stable to uneasy, and reminded him quietly that showering, food, then bed was the order we had agreed on for the rest of the evening. We could talk more on the way to Doctor Ishikawa's lab to meet Wufei and Trowa, as I had no doubt that they would be ditching their entourage shortly and would be able to help cover our tails. Even with the oaths we swore to the Preventers, we were a special kind after all and I knew they wouldn't disappoint. I hoped Une knew that too and wouldn't have the whole lot of us hunted down.
"Heero, the sooner we shower, the sooner we can eat and get some rest."
I watched him as he nodded and quietly pulled the dirty shirt over his head and stripped down out of the grungy pants we stole earlier. It was hard not to just stand there and drink him in. I felt that terrifying stutter in my chest and had to reach up and press my palm against the cool tile of the shower in order to steady myself. When my eyes met his again he was looking at me with an odd expression as if to ask me 'what next'. Like I really had a plan.
I steadied myself, took his hand, and pulled him with me fully under the warm spray of the shower. He let the water wash over him, turning his face up into it as I grabbed the shampoo from a little bin on the edge of the tub, squeezed a generous amount in my hand, and began washing his hair. He closed his eyes and just let me rub the suds in hard circles into his thick mass of dark hair until it was clean. Dirt was running down his face and chest in little rivulets so I gently placed my hands on either side of his head and tipped it back so the water could rinse away the soap and dirt. It was like moving in slow motion, every touch deliberate, slow, and tender. I knew the order was to get clean and then find food and bed, but I couldn't resist lingering for a little while. I ran my hands over his shoulders; kneading them until I finally felt those iron bands of muscle start to relax. I felt his arms snake around my back and ease up to my shoulders as he leaned into me and began to place hot, wet kisses along my collarbone and neck. I felt my pulse begin to quicken and my body responding to him, all of which threw me into a sudden panic. The path we were on right then was not appropriate timing given the circumstances and the surroundings.
"Later, I whispered into his hair. There will plenty of time for us later, Heero. I promise."
He eased away from me making my whole body instantly dimple with goose bumps. "I know, but I want you to know that it me here with you."
I could tell he knew I was stalling and that I was uncomfortable. I mean, despite that I always try to be the toughie in front of the guys, I craved every bit of the personal attention that was thrown at me. Always did, but I couldn't shake a feeling of dread. "Damn Heero, sometimes I feel like I know you better than I know my damn self. We've always been close, but I dunno...this has all just happened so damn fast, ya know?"
He only nodded and stood back to wait for me to finish washing my hair and a quick scrub down so we could get out and get dry. I made quick work of washing my hair knowing it would be a disaster later, and when I opened my eyes after being under the spray, Heero had stepped out of the tub and was toweling himself with a little more vigor than I thought necessary. I turned off the water and stepped out, taking the towel from him and finished drying him off.
"Duo, what happened before...it wasn't who I am."
I didn't quite understand what he was saying and paused trying to squeeze the excess waters out of my own hair to give him my full attention. "I'm sorry Heero, I'm not following you." I wrapped another dry towel around my waist and flung my wet hair behind me.
"I need you to understand that the things that you've seen; that you've heard... It isn't the way that this was all supposed to be."
That sense of dread was beginning to work its way up my spine to settle between my shoulder blades. A piece of me wanted to chalk it up to a piss-poor afternoon, sprinkled with a liberal amount of god-damn, ass-kicking, stress that I'm sure a little bit of sleep was not going to resolve. I didn't think I had a drop of adrenaline left in me, but could feel my pulse quicken regardless. I gave him a broad smile and shoved a towel at him to wrap around himself, ignoring how he had almost rubbed himself raw. "It's okay, Heero. We have plenty of time for you to explain everything to me later. For now, let's just stick to the plan tonight, ok?
He nodded and in his usually no-nonsense manner simply reiterated what we agreed on. "Shower, food then bed."
It made me laugh out loud. "Exactly."
I was having a hard time switching gears from exhausted and worried to down right horny and back to worried again. I did a half-assed job of drying myself, gathered our clothes, and ushered him out the bathroom door and back into the bedroom. The bedroom of a young dead soldier. One that I could have very easily been responsible for killing during the days of the wars. I decided that I just had too much going on to try to deal with that little piece of nostalgia and busied myself digging through the closet and chest of drawers until I found everything we needed. Boxer shorts, plain and cotton thank god, t-shirts, and a couple pairs of jeans. I kept digging through the chest of drawers and found track pants, probably from the kid's Oz academy days and trying not to feel that lump in my throat again, tossed a pair over to Heero to put on.
We dressed in silence. I didn't want to acknowledge that I was glad for it. Heero so...not Heero was starting to wear me down more than I wanted to admit. We'd been through hell and back before and I figured this would be no different, but we had never crossed the personal boundaries that we had in the last few days. Everything was taking a more personal edge now. Each stray look, every small sigh, took on new meaning and not all of it was pleasant. We were finally clean, dry, and clothed. I escaped being naked in a shower with Heero and in doing so spent the very last of my strength physically, mentally and emotionally. The bed was calling out to me, but food came first.
We made our way down to the kitchen to the smell of chicken frying. There was a huge mound of mashed potatoes on the table that were steaming from a large ceramic bowl right next to a plate of biscuits. The table was set for three, with tall glasses of milk, water, and bowls with some kind of yellow vegetable and sliced tomatoes. I must have been standing there like a drooling idiot because Butch moved away from the stove to grunt at us to sit while the popping crackle of chicken filled the small space. I wasn't shy about sitting down and filling my plate as I stuffed a warm biscuit into my face. Heero took my lead and took a biscuit as I piled potatoes onto his plate. I followed that with the yellow stuff that I later decided was editable, but could live without. Heero liked it so at least it wouldn't go to waste. Then Butch came to the table with the best looking fried chicken I think I ever saw. True, I was no fried chicken expert, but it was damn mouthwatering. Heero and I both had four pieces and after about a solid hour of eating in silence, I finally leaned back in my chair. "I give. I can't eat one more bite."
"Good to see that you boys have a good appetite. There's still more pie if you want."
I smiled and for a moment felt truly calm and relaxed. The kitchen was warm, filled with the smells of good cooking, wood, and a little grease. "I couldn't even if I thought it would save my life." Heero made a small noise next to me, like clearing his throat. I almost laughed at the small flush of a blush as he asked Butch for a piece of the fore-mentioned pie. Butch got up and got him the biggest damn piece of pie that I think he could and another glass of milk. I couldn't imagine where he was putting it but was glad to see him eat well and smiled that it made me feel even more content.
With the meal out of the way I figured that it was time for questions from the old guy, but none came. For a long damn time we just sat and watched Heero eat the pie. I almost felt obligated to say something, but with a belly full of food, sleep was screaming my name and I could feel my eyes getting heavy the longer we sat there.
"What kind of trouble you boys in?" I finally heard Butch ask Heero, as I began to doze off in my chair.
"The very worst kind." Heero answered simply as he cleaned off a little bit of pie crust from his thumb with a quick swipe of his tongue.
"There's bad and then there's worse." Butch said simply and sipped a bit of black coffee from a discolored ceramic mug. "The government don't go around hunting down their own as far I as know a-things. Especially not the ones like you who are heroes." I blinked away sleep and sat up a little in my chair as the food coma started to crush my will to stay focus on the conversation. Butch let out a bark of laughter. "I recognized you two right away. Even out here in the sticks we get the news. Yer the one who stopped that chunk a hell from wiping us all out a few years back."
"Hai." Heero nodded and answered politely never liking the attention that came with that particular moment in his life.
"So you must have done somethin' pretty damn bad for them to be hunting you like a damn rabid raccoon. And I don't mind helpin' ya, but feel you own me a reason why to make sure I ain't ever on the wrong side of again."
The picture of his son leaped into my mind. He must not have approved of his son becoming an Oz soldier back then. I was staring quite plainly at Heero, who seemed oddly calm.
"I'm afraid I know a very dangerous secret. The kind that will either destroy mankind or save it." Heero never broke his eye contact with me as if he was willing me to see everything else between the lines of those two sentences.
"Secrets can be bad, I'm right sure of that." Butch nodded and folded his arms across his chest and nodded.
"And now they know I have it." Heero dropped his gaze and the moment as he pushed his fork around his plate making little swirls out of the last bit of cherry filling. It was more information that I had received since the beginning of this hellish thing starting back at Heero's apartment. Comfort and sleep were sudden memories as I sat up hoping he'd say more.
"That's a pretty heavy thing to carry on yer own, don't you think?" Butch asked conversationally, not rattled at all by what Heero just said or the seriousness in which he said it.
"I'm used to carrying heavy burdens." Heero said quietly and pushed his plate away and stood. "It's why I was sent here after all."
I just blinked and let the words spin around in my head. Why he was sent here. From where, exactly? L1? To save mankind? I felt so close to getting the pieces to fit in my head, but then it was flooded with the memories of him falling from the sky, chunks of rock and metal falling all around him. The sky blazing with fire and the screams of all the people below while we just watched him save us all. I felt dizzy. I felt sick...I was never going to watch him do something like that again -- not alone. Not without me by his side. Hell no.
"Well, I suppose I understand why he's here. What's yer story then?" Butch fixed me with a look that felt as if it went right through me. I sat blinking at him unable to make the words come out. The room suddenly felt so small as both Butch and Heero sat looking at me; waiting for me to say some profound damn thing. All I could manage was; "He's my partner. Where he goes, I go."
Heero let a ghost of a smile pass his face before moving to me to pull me up from my chair. "Come on partner. We need some rest." I let him take control then, not surprised at how stiff and sore I felt as I stood up.
"Thank you for letting us stay here, and for the food, and clothes." I tossed over my shoulder to Butch as Heero led me from the kitchen and up the stairs.
Butch waved his hand in dismissal and grunted at us again. "If saving mankind is the reason that brought you two here, then I suppose it's the least I could do."
End Part 14
(:./ebony/drift14)
