Dr. G was trying not to giggle. For that effort, Duo was relieved, as a giggling doctor would have been a little more than he could have taken at the moment.
"So.... let me get this straight." Duo said, trying hard to hold onto his fraying temper. "You want me to go to the Bible Belt of the Universe, blend in as a wandering priest and find out about POSSIBLE, not even confirmed!, Oz influence in the area?"
"More or less. Still a talkative boy like you..." The doctor tapped the side of his nose with one finger. It was probably supposed to be a contemplative gesture, Duo was just busy trying not to stare. "How many languages do you know, my boy?"
"34." Duo replied automatically. "With varying degrees of fluency."
"How's your latin?"
"It sucks."
"Oh well. I doubt they'll notice anyway."
Duo sighed. "I don't suppose I have the option to refuse this mission?"
"You can..... under one condition." Duo motioned for the doctor to continue, eyeing that smug grin warily. "You have to refuse it in front of Heero."
Duo paled, considering. He might have a great deal of leniency being Heero's lover, but missions were on a whole different level.
"When's the shuttle?" he asked frevorently.
"I knew you would see it my way."
"Oh just shut up and give me the gate and departure time."
Duo had been slightly inaccurate, he admitted, when he had dubbed the small colony in the L5 cluster to be the Bible Belt of the Universe. True, Christianity did have a good following in the area, but truly the colony was better described as a melting pot for religious fanatics of all roots and races.
/Heh, Wu-baby comes from L5 too doesn't he? Not this sector though, I think. They certainly do know how to raise fanatics around here anyway./ Not that Duo was particularly complaining. For example, taking Wufei's singleminded determination and add a can of whipcream, made for a very.... interesting night.
Even in the relative calm of the spaceport, he could detect the faint mishmash of aromas of incense and muffled chants. /Hoo, boy, this was going to be a long mission./
"Excuse me sir?" A woman wearing a braid and oddly enough, little plastic devils horns was standing in front of him. There seemed to be a small cluster of girls in similar attire behind her.
"Er, yeah?"
"Please accept this pamphlet from the A and E Church of Demons and Unholy Choir." The woman pushed a gaudy red and brochure into Duo's hands, oblivious to his stunned stare. The girls behind her were singing something that sounded suspiciously like a corrupted version of the Mickey Mouse Club song. At least they were on key. "Thank you! And remember, Salvation is well and good, but the Damned have more fun!"
And like that, they were gone, with only a faint smell of cinnabar lingering to mark their passage.
"Jeez, and I thought /I/ was weird." Duo shrugged and checked his watch. Technically, he had 3 hours before the mission had to start.
An evil grin spread across his face. Three hours was a lot of time.
He was glad he remembered to pack a few cans of spray paint.
TBC
Yeesss, I know the fan club isn't a church yet ::giggles:: but 200 years is a lot of time to gain membership! And yes in part one it WILL start to parody the MP movie ::grins::::Runs off before anyone can splat her with rotten fruit.::
Nixers
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