15 Jan 2000
Author's note : This is my first attempt at a songfic and also my first attempt on a 4x3 (because Trowa-admin has been bugging me to write one *grins*) I have never written a 4x3 before, all my previous works are 1x2. So, I don't know how this will turn out. Not too OOC, I hope. *sweat* The song used for this fic is 'Keep On Loving You' by REO Speedwagon, one of my favorite songs from the 80's.
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the GW characters. This fic is written purely for entertainment purposes. I am not making a single cent out of it. So don't bother to sue me.
/...../ denotes lyrics
/You should have seen by the look in my eyes, Baby,
There was something missing
You should have known by the tone in my voice, Baby,
But you didn't listen
You played dead, but you never bled
Instead you lay still in the grass
All coiled up and hissing/
The first time I met you on the battlefield, the first time I set my eyes on you, I knew I had lost my heart. You were so beautiful, quiet but charming. There seemed to be an aura of mystic about you. I felt drawn to you by your mysterious yet enigmatic ways. I wanted to know you; I wanted to be with you.
You played the flute so beautifully. The music was heaven like to my ears. It was like a fire warming my heart on a cold night. I could imagine a circle of angels dancing around you when you play the flute.
You have no idea how your every move, your every word had captivated me. The alluring look in your eyes made me go weak in the knees. I knew I had fallen hopelessly in love with you. If only you will let me love you, let me into your heart.
/You know I know all about those men
Still I don't remember
‘Cause it was us, Baby, way before them,
And we're still together
And I meant every word I said
When I said that I love you
I meant that I love you forever/
You were groaning in your sleep. I knew you were having nightmares again, nightmares that kept plaguing you every night. I crept into your bed and held you tight, trying to comfort you. You woke up with a start. Sitting on the bed, still shuddering from the nightmare, you looked so tormented. I wiped away the sweat beads on your forehead, sweeping aside the long bangs that covered your eyes, eyes that were so emerald, so enchanting.
Please Trowa, tell me what is troubling you, tell me about your nightmares. Let me share the burden with you, I begged.
You turned those mesmerizing eyes at me hesitantly. I held your hands in mine, silently prompting you. Taking a deep breath, you began your tale of the horrible past.
You lost your parents since young. You grew up in a mercenary unit and were fighting in wars when you were only ten, an age where you should be enjoying your childhood, living in a world of child fantasies. But you never had a childhood. Growing up in a war-torn world, you were trained to kill at a tender age. Guns and huge mobile suits became your playthings. Surviving in an environment that comprised of only men; you became the victim of convenience, the object of lust by those lecherous men. They tore you apart, physically and emotionally. While the physical scars have healed, the emotional scars have continued to haunt you even after so many years.
I listened in grim silence. The image of a young boy huddled at a dark corner, shivering in fear appeared before my eyes. I felt so guilty. I was born and raised in a loving family while you grew up in a harsh and torturing environment. I was a pampered kid, getting everything and anything I want while you have to fight for survivor. I was overprotected by my family while you were defenseless against those horrible things they did to you. It made me so ashamed of myself.
Somehow you have misunderstood my silence. You pulled your hands away from mine and walked out of the room. You must have thought that I despised you, looked down on you because of your past. How could I? It wasn't your fault. How could I despise you? I was only angry with those inhuman soldiers who took away your innocence, your smile. I was never ashamed of you, I only wanted to love you.
/And I'm gonna Keep On Loving You,
‘Cause it's the only thing I wanna do
I don't wanna sleep,
I just wanna Keep On Loving You
And I meant every word I said
When I said that I love you
I meant that I love you forever/
You became cold and distant. You refused to look at me anymore. I tried to approach you but you kept your distance. I was clueless, not knowing what to do. Your behavior upset me tremendously.
On the battlefield, you fought with the enemies mercilessly; firing your machine cannons and beam gatling gun at every direction. Missiles were flying wildly everywhere. I was worried by the way you fought. You were reckless and impatient. You didn't seem to care about your safety. Soon you ran out of ammunitions. You abandoned your beam gatling gun and snapped on your hidden army knife, slicing the enemies' mobile suits with quick, smooth strokes, ramming your gundam against theirs.
What are you trying to do, I cried out. I knew you were seeking death, you didn't care about your life anymore. You were seeking ways to end it. No, you mustn't die. You can't die; I won't let you die. Not before I make known of my feelings for you. Not before I taste your sweet lips.
I charged forward furiously and sliced up those mobile suits that were attacking you with my pair of heat shorters. I shielded you from their attacks with my shield flashers. I won't let them kill you, I won't let them take you away from me.
/And I'm gonna Keep On Loving You,
‘Cause it's the only thing I wanna do
I don't wanna sleep,
I just wanna Keep On Loving You/
After I landed Sandrock in the hangar, I jumped out of the hatch and ran towards you, throwing myself into your arms. Though surprised by my sudden actions, you held me close as I sobbed in your arms, rubbing my tear stained face against your warm chest.
Trowa, please don't ever do that again, I pleaded. Don't ever try to throw your life away like that again. Your life is very precious to me, your being here is very important to me. I love you, please don't leave me. I cried harder in your arms.
My words had shocked him into deeper silence. I held onto you tightly, afraid that you might ran away from me. But you didn't. Instead, I felt your arms tighten around me and your lips close to my ear.
Quatre.....I heard you whisper softly.
/Baby, I'm gonna Keep On Loving You,
‘Cause it's the only thing I wanna do
I don't wanna sleep,
I just wanna Keep On Loving You/
That night, after long hours of passionate love making, you collapsed in exhaustion and slept peacefully in my arms. Though tired, I refused to go to sleep. I wanted to be awake, I wanted to be here when you had your nightmares. I wanted to be the one to soothe them away, to keep them away from you forever.
As I looked down at your sleeping face, I felt a sense of protectiveness swept through me. Yes, I will protect you; I will keep those haunting pasts far, far away from you. I will hold you in the safety of my arms forever.
I sealed my promise with a kiss on your lips, hugging you tightly in my arms. I don’t ever wanna let you go, I just wanna keep on loving you, forever. Please let me love you.
~~~The End~~~
All C&Cs are welcomed.
Minky