25-Nov-2000
Category: Silliness, FLUFF, SAP, friendship, mess in the kitchen! ^__^
Pairings: implied 1x2 and 3x4
Rating: R (for language and sexual innuendo)
Warning: Super fluffy ending! ^_~
Disclaimer: Not ours, unfortunately! ;;^__^;;
Notes: Just a little silly piece that came about on a night when we were bored. ^_~ Nothing serious, just a little offering for everyone. Take it as a belated Thanksgiving present! Hope everyone had a *great*one! ^__^
Laekin (seregill@aol.com) is responsible for Quatre and Trowa.
DaMoyre is in charge of Heero, Duo, Wufei and Sally. ^__^
It was Thanksgiving evening in one of the safe houses the Gundam pilots shared during the war. Duo sat by the kitchen table, playing with a few forks and knives, rolling napkins into paper balls and throwing them at Quatre. "I'm bored, Quatre. We really should find something to do."
Quatre turned to look at the other boy and raised an eyebrow. "You *could* help me make dinner, you know, Duo. A little help wouldn't hurt."
"Hmm...maybe," Duo said with a little smile. He stood up from his chair and walked over to the stove, dipping his finger in the warm gravy and taking a spoonful of mashed potatoes from the pot. "Quatre... you want to try this? It's good!"
Quatre turned his attention to Duo once more, eyes widening when he saw what the American boy was doing. "Duo! You have to wash your hands after you handle the turkey!" he exclaimed. "They have germs." He tsked softly and snapped a towel at Duo.
Duo moved a little to the side to dodge the towel and caught it with one hand. "Hey! Watch it!"
Quatre gave a little wave of the hand, ignoring Duo's protest. "Now... hmm...I remember that these are all the things we need for the stuffing, but how do we put it together? Do I just stick in the frozen onions or what?" Quatre mused to himself.
"Well, Quatre," Duo said, still licking the gravy off his fingers. "Just mix everything together and stuff it in! I mean, once it's cooked, it really won't make a difference, don't you think?"
Quatre tapped his lip and shook his head. "I don't think it's that simple Duo. I mean... I remember the cooks having to start the stuffing before they started the turkey. I have to cook something. I just can't remember if it's the frozen onions or the egg."
Duo took another spoonful of mashed potatoes and brought it to his mouth, tasting, savoring the mix in delight. "This is good!" He smiled.
"Hmm...," Quatre dismissed Duo with a little shake of the head. "Damn.. doesn't this place have a cookbook," Quatre said, looking at the label of the bag of stuffing and trying to free his towel at the same time. Finally giving up he looked up at Duo. "Oh, Duo... how does this go?" Quatre asked helplessly. "And... where did you put the cranberry relish?"
"Cranberry relish? Um... I don't know." Duo shrugged. "I put all the shopping in the pantry. It might be there." Duo took the spoon out of his mouth and stared at Quatre for a moment. /You really don't know what you're doing, Quatre... and *I* don't really know either...but I guess we can try to figure it out./ The American boy lifted his eyebrows a little.
Quatre held up a can of chicken broth and looked at it with a puzzled expression on his face. "Uh... then what's the chicken broth for?" He peeked up, catching the look on Duo's face, "Okay okay! I'm just gonna start mixing stuff, stop glaring at me like that."
Duo shook his head and smiled. "You're one confused little cook, Quatre. Let me do this!" He grabbed the chicken broth out of Quatre's hand and used a can opener to get the contents out and into a pot. "We'll use the broth for the stuffing." He began boiling the broth, and then added the contents of the stuffing bag.
A few minutes later, Duo stared down at the pot with a bewildered expression on his face. "Um...Quatre...is the stuffing supposed to look like soup?" He turned around and gave Quatre one of his most charming smiles. "It does dry up once inside the bird, right?"
Quatre's eyes widened, watching in horror as Duo grabbed and emptied the can of chicken broth on the stuffing. He did remember, at the last second, someone saying something about making certain the stuffing wasn't too moist. Chewing on his lower lip, he watched the breadcrumbs, expand then sort of turn goopy. He then looked at Duo; he'd heard the American grousing about missing yet another Thanksgiving meal, a holiday the rest of the team didn't really know much about but wanting to give the gregarious pilot something, the little Arabian had tried to put together what he thought would suffice on their meager budget. Quatre looked down at the mess in the pan and offered Duo a bright, sympathetic smile.
In the living room...
Heero sat quietly on the couch, watching as Trowa read an old French novel. He narrowed his eyes, trying to make out the title without much success. "Hn," he grunted, getting the green-eyed boy's attention. "I don't know if I trust them in the kitchen."
"As long as Quatre can keep Duo from eating everything," Trowa replied absently, never taking his eyes away from his book.
Heero leaned back against the couch and crossed his arms over his chest. "You know that's not going to happen."
"I don't know," Trowa offered. "The little one can be quite aggressive when defending frozen green beans," he said with a graceful shrug of his shoulders.
"And Duo can be quite persistent when it comes to getting his mouth full of... turkey... Or anything edible."
"And Quatre can be quite vicious with a towel," Trowa answered without looking up from his book. A moment's pause and perhaps the barest hint of a blush could be seen on high cheekbones.
Heero looked over at Trowa with the corner of his eye, not missing the slight flush on his cheeks. "I can only imagine..."
"You're the one talking about Duo putting things in his mouth," Trowa muttered under his breath, then cleared his throat before shifting on the chair.
"I was referring to food." Heero paused, looking intently at Trowa. "Or were you thinking something else?" The slightest hint of a smutty grin adorned Heero's face.
"Duo is not the quietest of individuals Yuy," Trowa delivered in characteristic deadpan.
That sentence made Heero lift and eyebrow. "If we're going to talk about loud... you and Quatre aren't bad either." He shook his head. "Next time I'll get a recording," he added.
"Oh yeah?" Trowa perked up an answering eyebrow. " 'Oh yes, harder, harder, spank me like the bad puppy I am'" he moaned, writhing a little on his chair. "Sound familiar Yuy?" Trowa smirked.
Heero felt a warm flush taking over him as his cheeks were bathed in shades of red and pink. He cleared his throat and spoke in an even tone. "Not as familiar as 'I'm at your mercy, Master Winner' "
Red spots appeared on Trowa's finely sculpted cheekbones "'Let's hear it for the Heero Hoovermatic, super suck!!!'" He said, in his soft voice.
Heero's eyes widened. "I'm going to gag Duo tonight."
Trowa calmly turned the page of his book. "So, Heero, exactly how does one go about deep throating a braid?"
"I have more useful ways to use that braid." Heero glared at Trowa. "Like wrapping it around someone's neck."
Trowa finished the paragraph he was reading and closed the book. He lifted his eyes to meet Heero's, keeping his expression completely neutral. "Really? I didn't know about the kinky sex."
"You have a death wish, don't you Barton?" Heero actually smiled.
Trowa set the book off to the side and neatly folded his graceful hands together in his lap. "Might I remind you, Yuy, I'm not the one screwing the God of Death."
"Hn," Heero murmured. "You have a point. However, Death embraces me. Probably wouldn't be so kind to you, Trowa." He smirked.
"Then it's a good thing I don't want to sleep with Duo, eh?" Trowa asked in his soft tone but his green eyes twinkled just a bit.
Heero tilted his head to the side and looked at Trowa, fixing his intense cobalt eyes on him. "Yeah. It would probably not be a good idea for you to sleep with Duo. Unless you really want to know what Shinigami can do," Heero pointed out with a little smirk. "It might be too much for you."
Trowa quirked a brow. "Are you challenging me to a swap?"
"A swap?" Heero looked down for a moment, calculating the implications of Trowa's suggestion. Yes, perhaps there was a possibility, but... "I don't know if Quatre would appreciate that," he replied. "But knowing Duo, he will be willing to try."
Trowa shifted in the chair, feeling as his jeans had suddenly become a touch too tight. "Quatre," he said, clearing his throat a little, "might surprise you."
"Oh," Heero had not expected the answer. "I never knew Quatre could be so full of... surprises."
Trowa gave a little shrug. "He has 29 older sisters. I guess he listened to them talk about their boyfriends."
Heero nodded. "Yeah. You're right. With 29 sisters, it would be hard not to know certain things." He stood up from the couch and looked at Trowa. "Do you think we should check the kitchen? It doesn't take that long to stuff a turkey. "
Duo was still fretting over the watery mix in the pot. "This isn't how the stuffing is supposed to look, Quatre!" He blew a little air on his bangs and shook his head. "For some reason, I don't think this was supposed to be so... watery." He turned to look at Quatre. "It's not going to turn out, is it?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm sure it will," Quatre smiled. "Here, add the egg and the onions and I'll get the bird ready."
Duo looked over at Quatre and returned the smile. It was always reassuring to have Quatre around. No matter how badly things turned out, he could always find a way to make it right. "This isn't good, is it, Quatre?" Duo laughed a little. "You're just trying to humor me now." He looked down at the stuffing once again, biting his lip for a moment and then laughed again. "Well, it will be a new recipe! 'Maxwell stuffing'!"
Quatre looked over at Duo with a consortial grin. "As long as you promise to announce that title when we put it on the table, you can call it anything you like. Now.. isn't there supposed to be a neck in this thing."
Duo stirred and heated up the stuffing a little more, trying to get some of the broth to evaporate before turning off the stove. "A neck?" He turned to look at Quatre. "They usually stick a little plastic bag with the neck and livers and all the nice fillings somewhere in the neck cavity or in between its legs," he paused. "Poor little guy!"
Quatre had his hand inside the turkey, and he looked down at the denuded, beheaded bird and blinked. "Aw hell, Duo... did you have to say that. I think I just lost my appetite." He pulled his hand out and pet the pale skin as if it were a beloved dog.
"Sorry, Quatre! I didn't mean it like that!" Duo looked over at the blond Arabian and burst out in laughter. "Poor little bird, huh?"
Quatre seemed to turn pale.
Duo laughed a little harder. "Honestly, how would you like to have your neck between your legs? That is...unless you're flexible like Trowa!" He flashed Quatre a devious grin.
Quatre paused for a moment, looking thoughtful, then spoke in his sweet innocent tone. "I'd never leave my own room," he announced matter-of-factly. "Okay... you about have that stuffing ready?"
"Almost ready," Duo said, turning back to look at the stuffing. Much to his relief, it looked a little drier.
"Hey Duo... do you think it had a name?" Quatre asked with a little frown. "Maybe this was some farm boy's pet."
"A farm boy's pet? Hm... maybe." Duo picked up the pot with the stuffing and walked over to Quatre, leaning against the table and looking down at the turkey. "What name do you think it had?" He scratched his head for a moment, thinking of a good name for the large, lifeless bird sitting on the table. "Camilla!" he finally exclaimed, his face brightening. "Camilla, the wonder turken! What do you think, Quatre?"
Quatre looked over at Duo in horror. "DUO!! Oh my... you named it. You named our dinner. How are we supposed to eat a named dinner!"
"We're having Camilla for dinner!" Duo smiled proudly.
Quatre looked decisively pale by now. "Is that stuffing ready?" he eyed the pot, trying to forget about the name 'Camilla'.
Duo passed Quatre the pot with the stuffing. "Yup. It's ready. Just shove it inside Camilla and then stick her in the oven. In only a couple hours, we'll have her on the table." Duo smiled innocently at Quatre.
"You are a sick, sick man. I'm not going to be able to eat a bite of this." Quatre groused morosely as he looked down at the naked bird, then began to shovel the goopy stuffing into the body cavity. "There better be cranberry relish... that's all I have to say."
Duo shook his head. "You have a very sensitive stomach and a delicate palate, Quatre." He laughed a little, as he walked over to the pantry. "Here, let me look for that relish for you."
Quatre turned and bristled, which was rather like watching a small kitten bristle... sort of cute... till you got twenty little claws in a sensitive spot. "You named dinner Duo... you NAMED it!!!"
Duo had to bite his lip, containing himself from collapsing on the kitchen floor, feeling his laughter erupting inside his chest. He forced a serious expression and took out the cranberry relish.
"It's not big deal, Quatre! Camilla won't mind. She doesn't care if we eat her or not," he offered helpfully. "In fact, she'll probably appreciate ending up at our table and not going to waste or staying in the freezer for another year." Duo smiled and wiggled his eyebrows. "Hey! Would you rather be frozen or cooked, nice and golden?"
Quatre continued to look at Duo as if he'd suddenly sprouted another head on his shoulders. "I'd rather have my feathers on and be clucking...." Quatre said, then gave his head a little shake. "Why am I debating this with you Maxwell... why? I should know better." He finished putting in the last of the stuffing, then he pulled open the door to the miniscule oven. "Oh please dear Allah, let this fit."
Duo stood there, extremely amused as he listened to Quatre talking about feathers and clucking. "You know, Quatre... you would look *really* cute with feathers on! I bet you could tickle Trowa's... nose!"
Quatre released the towel, aiming it towards Duo's face as he blushed furiously. "Hush!"
Duo covered his face with both hands. "Oi, Quatre! Take it easy with the towel man!" He snatched the towel away from Quatre and swatted him, quickly moving away and standing behind the table for cover. "Now, get Camilla in the oven or we won't have dinner ready any time this evening."
Quatre picked up the pan and started to wrestle it into the oven. "Funny... I thought you liked to be spanked around Duo." Quatre shot over his shoulder as he put up the oven door, then gave the American a pointed look and a sassy little dance of his brows. "At least, that's what it sounded like last night... little slap and tickle?"Duo stared at Quatre for a moment. "Hey, you better start minding your business and stop listening behind closed doors... Master Winner!" He grinned manically.
Quatre blushed but raised his chin, bright eyes twinkling, not nearly as embarrassed as his green-eyed lover would have been. "But I love hearing in graphic detail about just how hard Heero can suck."
Duo raised his eyebrow and smiled seductively at Quatre. "Well, if you like hearing about it so much, you might as well just come in and join in the action, you know? I mean... we don't bite, Quatre." Duo moved closer to the blond boy. "Just a little knock on the door is all it takes. If you feel so inclined," he whispered.
Quatre's cheeks burned an even deeper red but his pretty eyes gleamed as he caught the volley and returned it. Pouting a little, making the expression surprisingly sexy, he said in a dejected purr. "You don't bite? Damn."
Duo's mouth twitched a little as he looked at Quatre. "Well, we don't *usually* bite. But if you're going to pout that way for me, I might make concessions," he purred.
Trowa tilted his head to the side, listening for a moment. "I don't hear any sounds of mayhem... but they might have killed each other quietly while we weren't looking." The green-eyed boy came gracefully up to his feet as he finished speaking.
He walked over to the kitchen with Heero and both stood against the doorway. Trowa looked over his shoulder at Heero with a pointed lift of his brow. "They're in here setting up to choke the chicken."
"I thought we were having turk..." Heero stopped and gave Trowa a penetrating look.
Trowa lifted an elegant shoulder and graced Heero with his small, cheeky grin. "Just wanted to see if you were paying attention."
"Yeah," Heero nodded, then continued, "That or they ended up inside the oven instead of the turkey."
Trowa cleared his throat, leaning against the side of the doorframe. "So, how long is it going to take to cook this bird?"Quatre turned to look over at the taller boy and grinned. "About 2 1/2 hours."
Duo moved over to the fridge and took out a can of coke, snapping the tab open and taking a sip. "Yeah, about 2 1/2 hours," he replied to Trowa's question. "That is... if we're able to get the damn thing inside the oven!"
Quatre poked his little nose in the air. "Which I managed to do. What can I say.. I'm a master of working large objects into small spaces."
Trowa quietly curled around the edge of the door and back into the other room, trying to hide his red face.
"I thought Duo was the exhibitionist," Heero said in his usual monotone, but his eyes twinkled with amusement as he watched the deep blush in Trowa's cheeks.
Trowa just gently shook his head from side to side, muttering under his breath. "Watch out for the innocent ones."
"It's always either the quiet ones or the innocent ones," Heero paused to look at Trowa. "Though Duo is neither. How do you explain that?"
Trowa stood there, looking thoughtful for a moment, then shrugged. "The same way I explain Duo's ability to eat a pickle, peanut butter, ketchup, anchovies sandwich.... I don't."
"I don't think I'll be hungry after that graphic description of a 'Maxwell sandwich.' Not very appealing," Heero furrowed his eyebrows.
"You're the one who kisses him," Trowa said in deadpan, gently reminding Heero of certain facts.
"Yes," Heero nodded. "But I always make him brush his teeth."
"I always knew you were a wise man Heero Yuy."
Duo ignored the conversation on his eating habits and happily drank his soda. After a few gulps, he finally set the empty can of coke on the table and smiled at Quatre. "Well, since it seems you're a master in more than a few skills, perhaps you *should* join in the action sometime, Quatre. I don't think Heero would mind if you came to visit at night, you know?" He winked at the blond boy.
"Hey," Trowa perked up really quick. "I might mind."
Duo grinned when he heard Trowa's response. "Well, we can extend the invitation to you as well, Trowa," he called out.
Quatre brushed his hands off on a kitchen towel and looked thoughtful "Hmm... the four of us, screwing our brains out at the same time. I think Wufei would kill us all."
"If we don't manage to get him in bed first," Duo's face lit with a wicked grin.
Quatre stood there, looking thoughtful, then looked at Duo. "So, you're talking a five way here? How the hell are we going to manage that? We'd need to choreograph ourselves."
"Choreography wouldn't be a problem, Quatre. You don't feel up to the challenge? I mean, Trowa is good with choreography. He must be, for all his circus stunts. And I'm a good dancer. If you and Heero are a little...um... stiff, I'm sure Trowa and I could help." Duo smiled seductively, feeling his pants getting a little too tight. He would have said more, but the voice of a newcomer got his attention.
"I heard all that!" Wufei snapped, slamming the front door. He had been standing there with Sally Po all the time, feeling completely embarrassed and unable to make any excuses to justify what the young doctor had just heard.
"Wufei?!" All four boys turned towards the source of the voice, watching as the Chinese boy walked in with the unexpected visitor.
"Yes, it's me!" Wufei glared at them for a moment, his cheeks were burning bright red. "I brought Sally for dinner. I suppose I should have warned you earlier so you would behave!"
Duo laughed, looking a little embarrassed as his eyes met Sally's. "Um... Sally... we were just...um..."
"Shut up, Maxwell! We should have *you* for dinner," Wufei exclaimed. "You're such a turkey!"
Sally smiled, unable to hide her amusement. "This isn't a holiday I celebrate... but happy Thanksgiving, boys!"
The room broke into laughter. It was good to have Sally there with them. With the war going on, a little time of peace and a good dinner was always appreciated. For one night, they could be alive and enjoy each other's friendship. On Thanksgiving night, they could be thankful for many things.
~OWARI~
Laekin and DaMoyre
Please send comments to: seregill@aol.com or damoyre@aol.com