24-Nov-2000
Title: Fall Foibles
Author: Kimmie (JaenKaeGW@hotmail.com)
Archive: GW Addiction
Category: humor
Pairings: None.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I mean no harm, I have no money... Stuff like that. Yeah.
Rating: PG
Warnings: Silliness.
Spoilers: None.
Notes: This was inspired by the fact that I have to do this kind of stuff.
//...// denotes thoughts.
Heero marched over to Quatre's "chore board" with a stiff upper lip. //Please, don't let me get laundry...// The chore board had been a great idea... there was so much to do around the house, especially since Quatre had fired all of his cleaning staff when one maid walked in on him when he'd been playing "Ice Cream Sundae" with Trowa. Rashid posted on the board every three days who would do which chores, as determined by a random lottery. But, Heero thought there might be some conspiracy to it, especially since he always got stuck doing laundry.
With clenched fists, Heero looked at the board. There were more chores than usual up, and everyone had three tasks instead of their usual one. Trowa was in charge of vacuuming, cleaning the basement, and cleaning out the gutters. Quatre was assigned to sweep the hallways, clean the bathrooms, and beat the dust out of all the rugs. Wufei was to dust all of the furniture, clean the kitchen, and clean the attic. Duo had to rake the leaves in the yard, mow the lawn, and fertilize the grass since it was badly in need. Heero took a deep breath and looked at his own name and the list next to it. "Windows, living room, and laundry. Of course. Argh!"
At that moment, Duo walked into the room, yawning. "Oi, Heero, isn't it a beautiful day? Nice and cold." Making a face, Duo sat down on a stool, spinning it slightly.
Heero grunted and turned, then opened the refrigerator, searching for an appropriate breakfast for what was sure to be a horrible day. After a moment's consideration, he choose to reheat the leftovers from last night's pasta dinner. Starches would help lower his want to kill the dreaded white washer and dryer pair, and the sauce would keep him... Oh, hell, it tasted good and that was why. Even a perfect soldier can't rationalize all of his choices.
When Heero turned around, he found Duo eating a toasted bagel with butter and raspberry jam. "Aw, Heero. I know why you're upset. You've got laundry again, don't you?"
Heero nodded. "Yes. But, you've got to be outside all day long. Ha."
Duo smiled. "I bet you I can be done with all of my stuff before you finish one load of laundry."
Calculating Duo's usual rate of work with the size of the yard and the tasks themselves, Heero decided it was a bet he could easily win. "Okay. What would you like to bet?"
"How about a week of chores?"
"I wouldn't have to do laundry for a week?" Heero's eyes lit up at the prospect.
Duo nodded. "Yeah! And, maybe then I'd have some elastic left in my socks. You use too much bleach, Heero."
Though Heero despised laundry, he still took pride in it. "If the socks are falling down, it's because your calf muscles shrank from underusage. Get out there and work. You've got your bet."
Duo smiled and proceeded to purposely make a mess of the kitchen, knowing that Wufei would have the task of cleaning it all. Heero took the time to run off and begin the first load of laundry, just as a precaution.
After loading the first batch of clothing, comprised almost entirely of socks, along with detergent and only *one* cup of bleach, Heero decided to complete his other tasks while the laundry was going. With a determined grin, he marched into the living room and immediately sighed. He'd forgotten that last night had been board game night. Looking around, he spotted pieces for Yahtzee, Clue, Monopoly, LIFE, and bingo. And, they all needed to be picked up and put in their respective boxes. //Oh, man...// Heero sighed again and got to work.
Half an hour later, Heero picked up the last piece of Monopoly and promptly shoved it under the couch with the rest of the stuff. With a satisfied grin, Heero raced to get the window cleaner and a few rolls of paper towels. //Duo probably hasn't even raked yet! And... wait. Is that the lawnmower?//
With a frightened look on his face, Heero looked out the window and sighed. Duo was on the riding lawnmower, racing around the yard. The leaves were all gone, the yard was all mowed, and Duo was now tossing fertilizer behind him, yelling and making odd turns, often making the lawnmower go up on two wheels. With a final zoom around the yard, Duo somehow made the lawnmower do a 180º turn in midair after hitting a small hill. He landed and turned the throttle down, moving rather slowly to the garage to park the mower.
Heero sniffled. //I have to do his chores *and* mine for a week! And, this is fall cleaning week. There's probably stuff to do every day!// Just then, Duo bounded into the house. "Hey, Heero! Got your undies done yet?"
Stiffening, Heero shook his head. "No, Duo. You win. I'll do your chores for a week."
Duo grinned. "Told you, Yuy."
"Hn."
At that moment, Rashid walked out from the kitchen. "Masters Heero and Duo, the list of chores for the next week is up."
Duo grinned more. "Thanks, Rashid!"
Hesitantly, Heero walked into the kitchen and took a look at the chart. Then, he began to laugh maniacally. //Oh, sure, the one time Duo got assigned to do laundry!//
Owari. ^__~
Kimmie
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